sketch the bed

An exclamation used as a reaction to hearing some information about incredibly sketch behaviour. Derived from the common Bristolian saying "shit the bed".

Jon : "Did you hear about how he bootystepped 10 different people in 2 weeks?"
Chris : "What the fuck? Sketch the bed!"

by wl2009 February 9, 2009

Sleep Humper Bed

A bed mattress with holes that makes masturbation in bed for men easier than ever. A man may lay face down on the mattress so he can insert his penis into a hole that is shaped much like the tunnel of love sex toy. The man will then proceed to hump the bed until he ejaculates as the semen is washed down into a connected sewer line.

Honey, I bought the brand new Sleep Humper Bed so you won't have to worry about sex anymore.

by Kingmaster74 April 12, 2011

White Glove the Bed

Like crime scene investigators, but figuratively, wear 'white gloves' and clean up the bed (the crime scene) after an extra marital or secret sexual affair to get rid of the evidence left behind i.e. semen, cum, etc.

Stephanie and Sam had to white glove the bed after having sex so Sam's boyfriend wouldn't suspect anything.

by NeriumKiss June 24, 2016

empty bed syndrome

Feeling lonely when you're used to sleeping next to somebody but now you have to sleep alone.

Arturo broke up with his girlfriend and now at night he suffers from an acute case of empty bed syndrome.

by misskiki February 19, 2009

Going To Bed

What someone's says when there laying in bed playing on there phone so they don't have to talk

"Last night he said he was going to bed but he liked some bitches pic on instagram"

by wow._.kcb September 11, 2016

apple pie bed

Another term for short-sheeting, a practical joke where the lower sheet is folded back--effectively halving the bed's length--and placed under another blanket to disguise what has been done. The victim, often the joker's roommate, is meant to climb in, find him/herself unable to actually lie down, and look like an idiot.

Frank Zappa (shouting at his roommate after supposedly falling victim to one): This is an apple pie bed too far, Don!

by typacsk January 10, 2009

in bed

Words added to the end of any sentence to make it sound dirty. Works best when no one is expecting it, but always leads to an entertaining conversation. Overuse may cause your friends to pretend they're annoyed, but really they don't know what they'd do without you constantly twisting everything. When used in conjunction with that's what she said it can make class a lot more fun; especially choir because lyrics and vocal excerises are perfect source material. Abbreviated I.B.

Person 1: "She's very talented."
Person 2: "In bed!"

Person 1: "Make it look good!"
Person 2: "In bed!"

...you get the idea

by whohastoknow January 24, 2011