Port Alberni

A bumbling little hick town full of evolutionary throwbacks of all creeds and cultures, the only place in the world to develop the H (Hillbilly) chromosome through a combination of constant inbreeding and the fallout that blew in from the chernobyl accident. These H chromosome victims get together in contrived little groups and gossip and talk about subjects totally devoid of any meaning or sense, they just like to vibrate their vocal chords. The are smells like human waste due to their inability and lack of consideration to treat their own sewage, the bumbling yokels would prefer to "sleep where they shit" like pigs. Infested with crackheads, gold diggers, white trash and every other color of trash under the sun, it is a disgusting little pock mark on the planet. It simultaneously burning to the ground and sinking into the ocean would only beautify the surrounding nature, the only tragedy is there would be no more clam bucket, that place is the only place that makes a decent burger.

"Port alberni? Isn't that just another word for incestuous anal rape??"

by giggidygiggidybitches May 6, 2009

Alberta

Alberta's the best person to be around. She makes you smile and laugh for so long you'll forget what started you laughing in the first place. The greatest smile of anyone one you know but she is very insecure and has no self confidence or self esteem which brings her down. Has beautiful eyes and a very warm heart. Loves Loves Loves animals, has heaps of pets and remembers every single one. If you have an Alberta cherish her

I wish I could be like Alberta, she's so confident and stunning

by _TeenyTinyTunker_ November 28, 2018

Yellow Alert

A warning issued when a co-worker has been observed not washing his or her hands after urinating.

Bob: Don't eat the candies next to Ed's desk.

Rob: Why not?

Bob: Al put the yellow alert on him.

Rob: Ah dude... that's gross!

by vmx December 11, 2009

life-alert

a really old lady

"granny next door is a total life-alert."

by nateeeboo December 31, 2009

Herp Alert

A female, primarily in her late teens to early twenties, that has been with so many dudes that you know she has herpes just by looking at her. There are also undefined smells that come along with these looks that further verify the outbreak.

Man, she was totally on herp alert, I smelled her getting undressed

by hanofx May 18, 2011

sammich alert

"Bitch needs a sammich alert!"

a warning typically used on news sites such as fark to indicate that a celebrity has gone off the deep end with their diet

dude1: dude did you see those pictures of lohan on fark?
dude2: no is she teh nekkit?
dude1: no man, *shows pictures of anorexic LL*
dude2: *wretch* OMG SAMMICH ALERT
dude1: fo sho

by neoconraisedliberal May 31, 2005

Alberto Mudslide

Alberto Mudslide defines a type of feces. It is thick and sticky.

When you take a shit and you have to wipe 10 times because it is so thick and sticky you have a bad case of the Alberto Mudslides.

by Erik Dye December 14, 2005