Jump Bear - Jum-p Bear
Formally known to be a myth, but according to eyewitness accounts, the "Jump Bear", also known as the "Jumpu Bear-o" in Japanese is a small, furry creatures with dark-greasy grey matted hair, with a round flat nose with white ears and possess a set of fairly sharp-claws and teeth. Closely related to that of the Australian Koala, it eats primarily Gum Leaves and small children and makes for an excellent swimmer.
However, be warned that unlike its cute Koala cousins, the Jump Bears have a tendency to face hug an unsuspecting intruder when defending its hive. According to eyewitnesses account, the Jump Bear will build a large crane like structure made purely from digested leaves and meat, where it would creep over homes, office buildings and even Aeroplanes to latch onto its victim, These creatures live in very large communities, ranging from between 10-50 of them and during mating seasons, the males have a tendency to hunt down and latch onto any unsuspecting victim, often traveling hundrend's of kilometres and fearless of civilisation's hold, where it would continue to extend the family line of its species.
Formally known to be a myth, but according to eyewitness accounts, the "Jump Bear", also known as the "Jumpu Bear-o" in Japanese is a small, furry creatures with dark-greasy grey matted hair, with a round flat nose with white ears and possess a set of fairly sharp-claws and teeth. Closely related to that of the Australian Koala, it eats primarily Gum Leaves and small children and makes for an excellent swimmer.
However, be warned that unlike its cute Koala cousins, the Jump Bears have a tendency to face hug an unsuspecting intruder when defending its hive. According to eyewitnesses account, the Jump Bear will build a large crane like structure made purely from digested leaves and meat, where it would creep over homes, office buildings and even Aeroplanes to latch onto its victim, These creatures live in very large communities, ranging from between 10-50 of them and during mating seasons, the males have a tendency to hunt down and latch onto any unsuspecting victim, often traveling hundrend's of kilometres and fearless of civilisation's hold, where it would continue to extend the family line of its species.
This is an article from the daily bullshit
Bugbears, Werebears, Winne the Poo, but Jump Bears?!
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The eyewitness account of the jump bear epidemic in North Victoria during the 1950's have caused a majority of public figures such as WWF, Ani-care and Red-head Pauline "I don't like it" to come out and speak for the preservation of Australian Wild-life, Pauline was quoted for saying "The Tasmanian Tiger has been extinct for many years now and the Jump Bear epidemic of 1954 just causes me to say I don't like it" After WWF struck out that the animal should be taken captive and breed, they warned all local bush-walkers and metropolitan workers to wear safety gear when walking outside "You will never know when you'll be face hugged" WWF Spokesperson Jeff said.
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Bugbears, Werebears, Winne the Poo, but Jump Bears?!
--
The eyewitness account of the jump bear epidemic in North Victoria during the 1950's have caused a majority of public figures such as WWF, Ani-care and Red-head Pauline "I don't like it" to come out and speak for the preservation of Australian Wild-life, Pauline was quoted for saying "The Tasmanian Tiger has been extinct for many years now and the Jump Bear epidemic of 1954 just causes me to say I don't like it" After WWF struck out that the animal should be taken captive and breed, they warned all local bush-walkers and metropolitan workers to wear safety gear when walking outside "You will never know when you'll be face hugged" WWF Spokesperson Jeff said.
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by Randall Low December 9, 2008
Get the Jump Bearmug. A phrase referring to a person of african american descent. The term is not meant to be used in a racist way, but rather a secretive one. It is a revolutionary and confusing strategy used to discretely identify black people. Woogie bears are very dangerous and will most likely react poorly if discovered. If attacked play dead. Fortunately for you, woogies tend to feed on chicken and grape soda.
Kanye West says, "George Bush does not care about woogie bears!"
I feel like the only cracker among a sea full of woogie bears
Get a job woogie bear!
I feel like the only cracker among a sea full of woogie bears
Get a job woogie bear!
by WoggiesRus March 30, 2009
Get the Woogie Bearmug. Person A: "Wow he came with the force of a thousands monsoons..."
Person B: "That man is a sexual bear."
Person B: "That man is a sexual bear."
by St. Martin May 17, 2010
Get the Sexual Bearmug. The most amazing guy in the world! Sexy, smart, funny as hell & amazing in bed!! Every girl needs their own!!
by Pookerson August 26, 2011
Get the Jonah Bearmug. by Swallymallly12 April 18, 2018
Get the Baby Bearmug. by Ms. Downer May 20, 2009
Get the bitter bearmug. noun: a new market term that describes an argument or action that directly affects the market price positively.
A successful bear toss this morning by a new ASIC developer brought bitcoin's market price up 20%.
Before leaving Wikileaks, Julian Assange made a failed attempt at a bear toss by claiming that the US government was supporting bitcoin.
Before leaving Wikileaks, Julian Assange made a failed attempt at a bear toss by claiming that the US government was supporting bitcoin.
by Franklin D. Rosevelt May 7, 2013
Get the Bear tossmug.