White Knight Syndrome
A fairly common condition generally affecting males, White Knight Syndrome encompasses a wide range of behaviour related to "saving a damsel in distress". Almost always found near to or with Attention Whores, men affected by White Knight Syndrome are men who feel the need to protect, provide attention and affection, be viewed as "heroic", boost their ego, and generally feel good about themselves (usually because they have low self-esteem, or a small penis, or both).
Men with White Knight Syndrome are invariably attracted to Attention Whores or Problem Women (a sub-genre of the Attention Whore, the Problem Woman craves male attention and uses her often self-inflicted "problems" to attract the White Knight) because such women can cater to the White Knight's needs and vice versa--very much like the symbiotic relationship of bacteria and fungus in lichen. Men affected with White Knight Syndrome will spend long hours cuddling such women and giving them large amounts of attention and affection, sometimes struggling to hide their erections because the ego-boost feels so great. The male affected with White Knight Syndrome ends up in a position similar to the friend zone, but this does not matter to him--he's being a good guy by offering an Attention Whore more attention.
Men with White Knight Syndrome are invariably attracted to Attention Whores or Problem Women (a sub-genre of the Attention Whore, the Problem Woman craves male attention and uses her often self-inflicted "problems" to attract the White Knight) because such women can cater to the White Knight's needs and vice versa--very much like the symbiotic relationship of bacteria and fungus in lichen. Men affected with White Knight Syndrome will spend long hours cuddling such women and giving them large amounts of attention and affection, sometimes struggling to hide their erections because the ego-boost feels so great. The male affected with White Knight Syndrome ends up in a position similar to the friend zone, but this does not matter to him--he's being a good guy by offering an Attention Whore more attention.
White Knight's girlfriend: "Shall we go out this evening? I worked hard all month so that we could go to that expensive restaurant we've always wanted to visit!"
White Knight: "Oh no! I'm terribly sorry; I was texting Suzie all last night behind your back and she says that she's pregnant again and her boyfriend raped her and her horrible, selfish father refuses to pay for her clit piercing, and she needs me to come over and hug her! I must go to her and comfort her, poor poor thing!"
White Knight's Girlfriend: "Isn't that girl using you as a snot-wipe on legs?"
White Knight: "No, I'm being there for her! I'm her shoulder to cry on! She needs me! I'm such a great guy!"
White Knight's Girlfriend: "What about me?"
White Knight: "Sadly for you, you're a well-balanced lady who doesn't have any problems and doesn't constantly burden me with your need for attention; you're not a damsel in distress and you can't provide me with the ego-boost I need. Go pay our bills, I'll be back in two days."
White Knight's Girlfriend: "Your white knight syndrome is getting out of hand. You know, I love you even if your penis is small."
White Knight: "Oh no! I'm terribly sorry; I was texting Suzie all last night behind your back and she says that she's pregnant again and her boyfriend raped her and her horrible, selfish father refuses to pay for her clit piercing, and she needs me to come over and hug her! I must go to her and comfort her, poor poor thing!"
White Knight's Girlfriend: "Isn't that girl using you as a snot-wipe on legs?"
White Knight: "No, I'm being there for her! I'm her shoulder to cry on! She needs me! I'm such a great guy!"
White Knight's Girlfriend: "What about me?"
White Knight: "Sadly for you, you're a well-balanced lady who doesn't have any problems and doesn't constantly burden me with your need for attention; you're not a damsel in distress and you can't provide me with the ego-boost I need. Go pay our bills, I'll be back in two days."
White Knight's Girlfriend: "Your white knight syndrome is getting out of hand. You know, I love you even if your penis is small."
White Knight Syndrome by SourPuss91 January 14, 2014
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