The Bible

A book written by a bunch of hippies, about 2000 years ago, who were smoking some serious hash at the time. Never actually figured for their text to be taken seriously.
"Hey, Josh, dude, let's put some shit in their about a guy, right?"

"Yeah, rad man, and he can be like... uh, tossed overboard into the, uh, like ocean, right?"

"Cool, and then, like... a giant fish, just like, comes up and swallows him, man."

"AWWWWH, far out man!"

"And he could then, like, chill in the fish for a few days, before it like... spits him back out, you know?"

"Chilled man."

"What should we call this book, yo?"

"How about, like, someting that sounds like Babel."

"Yeah, like the town."

"Only, bib... Bibe.... oh, The Bible!"

"Holy shit man!"
by Degree7 July 09, 2009
Get the The Bible mug.

The Bible

The most famous fantasy novel in human history.
The Bible isn't even that good, LOTR is a much better fantasy novel. The Bible is quite stupid and contradicts itself a lot. I think a retard wrote it.
by Bloodbath 87 March 06, 2009
Get the The Bible mug.

The Bible

A book used to control the masses with a false threat and reward system.
See: George W. Bush, mind control
Do what your told like the bible teaches.
by The Kryptonian April 07, 2005
Get the The Bible mug.

The Bible

A book of complete horse shit. It makes no fucking sense and explains nothing!
The Bible is a waste of time!
by the last name meadows is gay August 14, 2011
Get the The Bible mug.

The Bible

An egotistical autobiography people put in the fiction section at times.
Church: "Did You Read The Bible"
Priest: "No"
Church: "Get The Hell Out Then"
by ThyOfThee January 25, 2021
Get the The Bible mug.

The Bible

The Bible comes in handy when you have run out of
a.) Toilet paper
b.) Kindling
c.) Spitball ammunition
d.) Coffee filters
e.) Paper towels
f.) Diapers
g.) Maxi pads
h.) A surface from which to snort your cocaine

...Among other things.
by Rev_elation April 03, 2008
Get the The Bible mug.

The Bible

A book of fairy tales that religous fanatics use as an excuse to breed hate.
Gay marriage and drugs are amoral and therefore wrong according to The Bible so ill have my senator make them illegal. FUCK THIS BOOK!
by arizonabay January 06, 2010
Get the The Bible mug.