The Main Line is a suburb of Philadelphia for rich, polo-shirt wearing Jewish democrats. You know you live on the Main Line if:
*Your most commonly used phrase is "
Daddy, can I borrow the jag?"
*Your school offers a course on ordering coffee at
Starbucks.
*You know that Merion Country Club is the only appropriate place to play
golf.
*The biggest gossip at the public school is that two members of the graduating class aren't going to
college...well, they technically are, but anything other than Ivy League doesn't count.
*You just love Philly Cheesesteak...but of course yours is made with tofu and is carb and lactose free.
*For vacation you either go to your house on the "shore" or Paris.
*You give thousands of dollars to the Democratic party but really are a closet
Republican.
*You are constantly embarrassed of Narbeth (AKA the crotch of the Main Line).
*When checking accounts
dip below $20,000 you go into "Frugal" mode.
*Frugal mode to you means buying one bracelet at Tiffany's instead of two.
*You don't think Wawa sounds
funny.
*You are surprised that there aren't bus tours of the prep schools in Lower Merion.
*Your favorite hobby is translating the
words "Estate Tax" into Hebrew looking for evidence that they are the sign of the Antichrist.
*Your favorite food is "churry wooder ice" but if anyone asks it's Potatoes Dauphinoise.
*On your 16th
birthday you graduated from doing all your shopping at Bala GC to the much more sophisticated Saks.
*You own at least one of the boathouses on the row.
*You get depressed because you can't afford a new
car until your dividends come in...meaning
people will see you drive that old 2003 Mercedes S Class Sedan around Radnor for another two months.
