schlomper Share definition Flag 1) noun - Number of semen emissions during an ejaculation. 2) noun - a stupid person or thing. 1)Last night I shot six schlompers while cumming, good work Honey! 2) President Bush is such a Schlomper. schlomper by S.A. Khan August 31, 2004 0 0 Get merch Get the schlomper mug. Buy Now — $32.95 See more merch