The style of football (soccer) made popular by the Barcelona squad and Spanish national sides. This style of football is marked by a teams OCD-like need to pass the ball as many times as possible during a match; even if the pass serves no other purpose than to pad the player's stats and serve the manager's delusion that whoever passes the ball the most wins the game. This includes 1-yard sideways passes in your own half while under no pressure, passing while staring at an open net inside the box and the 40-yard backwards pass to the goalkeeper.

Person 1: Are you a Barcelona fan?

Person 2: Hell yeah. I basically bust a nut while watching that team not try and score, but instead just pass the ball around. How about you?

Person 1: Nah, I'm not a huge fan of passturbation. I like teams that can actually fuck; like Baryen Munich, for instance. Hey, didn't those two teams play each other recently?

Person 2: Uhh...Messi was hurt that day...both days....

Passturbation by fatgunnersaurus November 21, 2013

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plansturbating

To over-complicate a situation through excessive or unnecessary planning, to the point that progress or enjoyment is hindered

1. We would already be halfway through with this project if the business would stop plansturbating and just let us work.
2. Family vacations are more work than fun because of all of Mom's plansturbating.

plansturbating by The Marmoset King March 5, 2017

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plasturbation

To massage your own worldview by rejecting facts or other information that conflicts with it. To condemn the expression of opinions that differ from your own. To deny the validity of all worldviews other than your own. See plasturbate.

"He refuses to listen to what other people have to say; he just plasturbates."

"Don't bother talking to her unless you like hearing plasturbation."

plasturbation by JohnnyReb87 February 12, 2009

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