desk gremlin

A whore who roams the office under desks providing oral pleasure to coworkers to boost company moral

Worker 1 "Why is Paul so happy this morning?"
Worker 2 "The desk gremlin must have paid him a visit"

desk gremlin by Nathan Lepoudre January 24, 2018

Desk Holiday 

Desk Holiday (DH)

A Desk Holiday is created when you are busy at your desk and suddenly your office computer server or telephone system goes down preventing you from continuing your work. DH is a common syndrome affecting tax paid government employees.

Also See: Desk Holiday Hangover (DHH)

“Dude, want to grab a coffee, I just got a Desk Holiday!”

Desk Holiday by Elliott G September 4, 2007

Desk Sandwich 

A sandwich one hides in their desk at work to consume at any given time, usually eaten in secret when someone has much work to catch up on.

"Man, I had to work during lunch, good thing I had a Desk Sandwich otherwise I never would've made it."

Desk Sandwich by poizunman August 3, 2012

Desk Inferiority Complex 

Desk Inferiority Complex is related to office envy and desk envy. A patient who suffers from desk inferiority complex will be working in a company where the desks are so small he or she believes they can't work properly and will need a larger desk. The disease manifests itself only after the patient has noticed that other companies have larger, strikingly bigger, massive, gleaming desks with satisfied looking workers sitting behind. According to Adler, all office workers experience feelings of desk inferiority as children having seen their father's big desks and spend the rest of their lives trying to compensate for those feelings.

John's desk inferiority complex has become so bad that he is now trying to use two desks with the pedestal between his legs.

Desk Inferiority Complex by WorkVitamins March 13, 2008

Desk Rage 

The peak of office employee stress levels which ultimately starts with the screaming of vulgar language within the workplace. It can often times lead to assaulting fellow employees, abusing office equipment and/or stealing of company property, abusing sick days and ultimately poor production at work. A possible side effect is that the employee continues to take out his or her rage at their residence in the form of kicking small animals and drinking heavily.

With my pending at work and the amount of people calling me each day I'm on the brink of desk rage and one day I'm going to break and take it out on that weird guy that sits next to me.

Desk Rage by The Russ Buss November 29, 2006

Desk fat 

A raging erection which occurs whilst sitting at a desk, often in a work situation after a scantily clad co-worker passes by, or occasionally on television panel programs where one of the hosts is sitting next to a rather fit lady who oozes sex. Given the public nature of this erection, the individual with the desk fat is unable to leave the safety of the desk for fear of being exposed as a deviant until the desk fat subsides

Lehmo was seated next to The Veronicas on this evening's edition of The Project, and given they project their sexuality in such an overt manner, Lehmo found himself with an enormous desk fat the moment the interview began

Desk fat by Retrovertigo November 28, 2014

Desk Weed 

The small bits of marijuana crumbs found in the small crevices and corners of your desk at home or maybe at work, who knows anymore.

Oh look, I found some Desk Weed!

Desk Weed by Oreodude420 July 6, 2017