santa claus

a pedophile who comes into homes looking for children from the ages of 2-9 to molest. He comes down the chimey, eats the cookies and milk the kids leave out, goes upstairs to molest the children, and then leaves a present thanking the little ones for their service.

Mom: "What are you asking Santa Claus for this christmas."

Kid : " A tazer."

Mom: "Why would you ask for that?!"

Kid: "So he can stop coming to our house. He takes off my clothes and makes me do weird things. A tazer could stop him for sure."

Mom: ......

santa claus by Ninja Cullen December 18, 2009

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Santa Claus

A red communist fat ass who doesn't know how to shave and owes me a pogo stick.

Santa Claus: Ho, ho, ho! Merry Christmas!

Me: There is nothing good about who you are or what you do.

Santa Claus by FuckYouSanta August 27, 2013

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Related Words

claustrophobia • claustrophobic • claus • claust • clausania • clausbites • Clauseacumaphobia • Clausemopolitan • clausen • clauser

Ganja Claus

The mythical figure said to visit stoners that have been good in the last Weed Year, leaving them presents on 4/20 eve to reward them for their good behavior.

Ganja Claus is most often pictured as a jolly old rasta with long dredlocks, dressed head to toe in green. Rumours state that he flies through the sky on a lawn chair pulled by 8 giant sloths

dude: "you gonna roll another one?"
other dude: "nah we've only got a ten bag left any dan will need a spliff after work..."
dude: "wow man, that's nice of you. I hope Ganja Claus is watching..."

Ganja Claus by Olly J April 22, 2007

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Yenta Claus

She must be some sort of Golem or my Bubbie dressed up as one. I really like her. She brings Jewish kids, well and anyone who else who believes in her too I guess, really nice toys and stuff just like Santa Claus only she is Jewish!

I saw Zaddie kissing Yenta Claus while she was noshing on latkes!

Yenta Claus by Jason MacBeeSting September 13, 2006