antique roadshow 

Grannie giving grandpa road head

you can put a dollar value on the antique roadshow but you can't put a dollar value on geriatric road head. An oldie buta goodie

antique roadshow by Sunshine9838 February 4, 2010

antique scrode show 

A PBS series surrounding the examination, valuation, and fraud identification of really old ball sacks.

"Git yer ass down here, the Antique Scrode Show live from Naples, Florida is about to start!"

antique scrode show by teej October 16, 2003

Antique Sofa 

In reference to terms such as 'cougar', 'puma', and 'snow leopard', meaning older women whom one would want to pursue intercourse with. The 'antique sofa' is the older woman who, despite initial appearances, turns out to be creaky, dried out, and uncomfortable to sleep on; an anti-cougar.

Lyndsay: Yo, I heard you banged our English teacher last night. That's awesome.
Greg: No, it wasn't. Looks like a cougar, fucks like an antique sofa.
Lyndsay: NO! Fail.
Greg: Epic.

Antique Sofa by Dookaleechy December 3, 2010

Antique Wood 

an errection of a man over the age of sixty-five.

"That old fuck has a mad case of antique wood"

Antique Wood by The swagenator April 18, 2008

antique farming eqipment 

an old black man sitting at an bar, cotton picker slave

hey tony look at that antique farming eqipment sitting at the bar.

antique farming eqipment by swap donkey November 21, 2011

Antique Chandelier 

A variation on the act referred to as the 'antique' method where tea-bagging is added mid throw so that the extra 'baggage' resembles an antique chandelier on the friends face.

" Woah dude, you just totally antique chandelier that dude... with your nuts."

"We should Antique Chandelier the Cro-Mag."

Antique Chandelier by Deadly Jerm January 21, 2009

Antique Magician 

Verb; The act of emmiting one's load, or money shot, on a female's face and proceeding by throwing a handful of flour in the air and disappearing by the time it settles.

I performed the antique magician on your girlfriend last night.

Antique Magician by BAWB04 March 6, 2011