telephony's definitions

lasercide

The intentional murder of a laser -- usually done in the name of science.

That scientist committed first degree lasercide on that poor, defenseless laser just to see how long it would operate at maximum candiosity...er...uh...INTENSITY before it pooped out.

by Telephony November 30, 2010

I've Been Sitting on the Shitbowl

A phoney-bologna fake made-up song, sung to the tune of, "I've Been Working on the Railroad".

♫ I've been sitting on the shitbowl ♫
♫ All the live long day ♫
♫ I've been sitting on the shitbowl ♫
♫ Just to waste my time away ♫
♫ Don't you hear the pisser flushing ♫
♫ Sleep in so late in the morn ♫
♫ Can't you hear the restroom attendant yelling ♫
♫ Quick, get an air horn! ♫

by Telephony August 6, 2015

toilet bowl paper

What a roll of bungwipe becomes when it falls into the toilet and subsequently requires disposal.

{Ed}: Myrna, can you run get me another roll of assiton assimilators please? This roll fell into the can, becoming toilet bowl paper!
{Myrna}: Ed, that's the third time this month that you've made toilet bowl paper! Won't you please fix the TP dispenser?!?

by Telephony September 22, 2014

STP

Simply put: the acronym for Soggy Toliet Paper.
It is *** NOT*** the motor oil additive that makes your car motor run better!

Don't use that end stall!!! It has STP in it!!!

by Telephony June 1, 2015

sawrong

Simply stated, a sarong worn by a woman on which the garment looks just awful on her.
Used exclusively in written or typed text; it is pronounced the same as sarong.

That lady across the street has a sawrong on. How ugly!!! :-(

by Telephony May 22, 2016

piss the bed

The incorrect way to say, "piss in the bed".
After all, you don't say, "piss the toilet" or, "piss the bottle"; you'd say, "piss IN the toilet" or, "piss IN the bottle".

{Mother} : Jimmy, no more Kool Aid tonight or else you might piss the bed.
{Jimmy}: Mommy, don't you mean I might piss in the bed?

by Telephony May 3, 2018

asshole doctor

Plain and simple: a proctologist.

Not this morning Dean, I have an appointment with the asshole doctor at 8:15 so he can take a look at my anal warts!

by Telephony May 16, 2014