telephony's definitions

synthetic car horns

The sound of automobile horns created entirely by hardware or software synthesis.
No real car horns are harmed when synthetic car horns are used.

Most frequently found in synthesizer music and computer demo zax.

The demo program for the Apple Mac titled, "Chevrolet" by the computer demo group Nooon has synthetic car horns in it. Howl kewl!!!

by Telephony April 4, 2015

I Need to Hit the Head

A fake, phoney-bologna totally fictional jingle one might sing when they have to use the toilet or urinal.

{Sung to the tune of the nursery rhyme, "The Farmer in the Dell"}:

♫ I need to hit the head, ♫

♫ I need to hit the head, ♫
♫ Don't piss in the stereo ♫
♫ I need to hit the head! ♫

by Telephony April 6, 2017

flying penis

What some people call a Boeing CH-47 Chinook helicopter (the kind with no tailboom and two sets of main rotor blades located on the upper side of the fuselage both fore & aft; sometimes called a tandem helicopter) because it looks like a big ding-a-ling flying through the sky.

Hey Dennis, check out the flying penis near those buildings over there!!!

by Telephony September 28, 2013

cannoñata

From the now-defunct TV series, "Viva Piñata": The cannoñata (pronounced as though it were spelled, "cannonada") is a fictional device designed to shoot piñatas to piñata parties from its location (Piñata Central aka. Party Central, in very close proximity to the candiosity meter) on picturesque Piñata Island.

{Langston Lickatoad}: Get over here Fergy, time to get your candiosity checked and get you loaded into the cannoñata!

by Telephony October 31, 2014

Sonic Z

The opposite of Sonic X -- that is, Sonic the Hedgehog that moves extremely slowly.

{The Sonic X theme song but with torpedoed lyrics}

♪ Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop ♪
♪ Gotta stop slow, gotta stop slow, ♪
♪ Gotta stop slower, slower, slower, slower, slower ♪
♪ Movin' at speed of dark (make tracks) ♪
♪ Slowest hedgehog it barks ♪
♪ Got ourselves a situation, stuck in a new location, ♪
♪ Without any explanation, no double relaxation! ♪
♪ Don't, don't, don't, don't, don't think, don't stink, ♪
♪ Just stop, stop, stop, stop, s-s-s-s-stop, stop! ♪
♪ Gotta avoid the ♪
♪ Bam Slam Gadget! ♪
♪ Sonic, he's not the hero! ♪
♪ Sonic, he's number zero! ♪
♪ Sonic, he's coming whee!, ♪
♪ So watch out... For Sonic Z! ♪
♪ Gotta stop slow (Sonic!), gotta stop slow (Sonic!), ♪
♪ Gotta stop slower, slower, slower, slower, slower! ♪
♪ Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop! ♪
♪ So... (Sonic) nic... (Sonic) Z, ♪
♪ Gotta stop slow! ♪
♪ Gotta stop slow! ♪
♪ Gotta stop slower, slower, slower, slower, ♪
♪ Sonic Z! ♪ :-)

by Telephony July 8, 2019

hamster mouth

What presidential-elect Donald Trump had when he was campaigning.

If you looked at his cocksucker when he was talking, his lips would very frequently become pursed and it looked as though he were a hamster -- or even a fish at times.

Hey Carolyn!ain,trail
Trump is having this TV debate with Hillary -- you've just got to see his hamster mouth, hahaha!!!

by Telephony January 15, 2017