545 definitions by telephony

synthetic finger popping

The sound of somebody popping their fingers, created solely by synthesizer hardware or computer software synthesis -- not all unlike how synthetic clapping, synthetic cans, synthetic car horns, etc. are produced.

Kat McSnatch's song, "I Don't Like You" is terrific, but it would be even better if it had synthetic finger popping it instead of real finger popping.

by telephony April 29, 2015

piss-littering

The act of throwing plastic jugs of urine out of a vehicle window and into the roadside ditch or weeds / bushes.
Piss-littering is usually performed by long-haul truckers as a matter of convenience.

It's the problem that's threatening to turn Oregon into a 97,052-square-mile Honey Bucket: roadside urine dumping. Today, to fight the epidemic of plastic jugs of urine being tossed from cars onto the roadside, the Oregon House Transportation Committee endorsed House Bill 3530, which would make improper disposal of human waste punishable by fines of up to $2,500. The Seattle P-I reports that the bill would target all urine-tossing motorists, but would specify harsher penalties for commercial drivers; in addition to pricey fines, pro truckers found guilty of piss-littering could face license suspension. State officials blame the boom in abandoned jugs on increased competition in the trucking industry, which deters truckers from stopping for pee breaks, but Oregon trucking associations are crying foul and playing innocent. "I don't think there's any evidence it's the trucking industry," said trucker lobbyist Robert Russell, adding, "Whoever's doing it shouldn't be doing it." Bill 3530 now goes to the Oregon Senate Transportation Committee.

by telephony August 8, 2020

Hammermaker Schlemmner

What some people call Hammacher Schlemmer -- the catalogue of somewhat unusual (and usually quite expen$ive) products that's been around since 1848.

Hey Dean! I just got the Holiday 2016 copy of the Hammermaker Schlemmner catalogue, and they have a self-heating bathrobe in it! I think I'll get on the blower and order one right now!

by telephony November 24, 2016

Twenty Stick-Broken-Sticks

This is simply the year 2014; when viewed from above, the, "4" looks like some broken sticks.

From a BBS about wheelchairs & scooters:

New Year's Day (0-01-14) {or "2014 01 Jan.", or even "Jan. 01, Twenty Stick-Broken-Sticks if you prefer}. Just making my daily check-in from Juneau AK. USA...my people (who live in Nicaragua) we have but one bunghole...er...uh...I mean, "I only have a sodding singular update to my website today: it is an update to my Foto(s) del Día" web page with...well, what else could it be?

by telephony December 30, 2014

fudgepacking

What somebody might call, "packing" for a move when they're forced to move frequently.

{From the side of a MeHaul moving box}:

ME-HAUL BOXES ARE SPECIFICALLY SIZED TO MAKE FUDGEPACKING
AND UNLOADING HARDER FOR THE DON'T-IT-YOURSELF F46607.

by telephony July 4, 2014

didgeridon't

People who hate the sound that a didgeridoo makes call it a didgeridon't.

I fucking hate that cocksucking didgeridon't being "played" by the dock! Sounds like a motherfucking wounded elephant trying to give birth!!! :-(

by telephony September 12, 2016

pee IN the toliet, not ON the toliet!

An admonish men given to males with bad aim while passing micturition.

I just had cataract surgery; now I can pee IN the toliet, not ON the toliet!

by telephony June 15, 2014