tariqk's definitions
To actually take into account the costs of retaining a Great Man in any organization. Costs include the number of people said Great Man drives out of the organization due to their behavior, the amount of legal fees that they could expose said organization to due to anti-harassment lawsuits made by other members, organizational reputation loss, etc.
Clarence: …and that's why I recommend that the board does not terminate Mr. Stallman's role in our organization.
Kelly: Okay, go back to slide 15…
Clarence: Got you. What's your question, Kelly?
Kelly: I was afraid of that. You forgot to carry the great man. What happens when you do that, Clarence?
Clarence: Oh, right. Let me put that in the spreadsheet… huh. I guess we should fire Mr. Stallman's ass, then.
Kelly: I was afraid so.
Kelly: Okay, go back to slide 15…
Clarence: Got you. What's your question, Kelly?
Kelly: I was afraid of that. You forgot to carry the great man. What happens when you do that, Clarence?
Clarence: Oh, right. Let me put that in the spreadsheet… huh. I guess we should fire Mr. Stallman's ass, then.
Kelly: I was afraid so.
by tariqk December 5, 2021
Get the Carry the Great Manmug. A term used in software engineering to define a period of time before a promised feature or bugfix will be released. The period of time is usually, “Never.”
We'd like to thank all or users for their patience and forbearance during really difficult time, and we'd like to announce that all the feature requests and critical bugfixes will be released Real Soon Now™.
by tariqk December 5, 2021
Get the Real Soon Now™mug. Like “reinventing the wheel”, but for techbros.
More precisely, it is to spend an incredible amount of money, time and mental effort to finally come to a solution that was actually figured out decades or even centuries ago.
Bonus points if you end up making yet another app using the blockchain, so that in order for you to use it, you need to put your SSN on a distributed public ledger so that it can get pwned by Russian hackers.
More precisely, it is to spend an incredible amount of money, time and mental effort to finally come to a solution that was actually figured out decades or even centuries ago.
Bonus points if you end up making yet another app using the blockchain, so that in order for you to use it, you need to put your SSN on a distributed public ledger so that it can get pwned by Russian hackers.
“Ok, pitch it.”
“Ok so like basically we get people to pool their money together into one thing and then invest that thing into Bitcoin and use the profits from that investment to pay everyone involved once a month, and then when someone dies their portion of the investment goes to the other participants.”
“…you just described a tontine.”
“A what?”
“A tontine. The thing you're describing. It's been around since the 17th century. Are you reinventing the bus again?”
“No way, man! This one's different, this one uses JIT-compiled vue.js and blockchain smart contracts to keep track of the system!”
“Brilliant. Here's a million dollars, we're gonna be rich!”
“Ok so like basically we get people to pool their money together into one thing and then invest that thing into Bitcoin and use the profits from that investment to pay everyone involved once a month, and then when someone dies their portion of the investment goes to the other participants.”
“…you just described a tontine.”
“A what?”
“A tontine. The thing you're describing. It's been around since the 17th century. Are you reinventing the bus again?”
“No way, man! This one's different, this one uses JIT-compiled vue.js and blockchain smart contracts to keep track of the system!”
“Brilliant. Here's a million dollars, we're gonna be rich!”
by tariqk November 21, 2022
Get the reinventing the busmug. Chief Information Officer. If you read the industry publications, Chief Information Officers are at the vanguard of today's information-centric workplace. In practice, it's basically some poor schlub who's been given a fancier “IT Manager” hat, who's been given the responsibility to fix the dumpster fire that is your IT Systems, by giving “suggestions” that are roundly ignored by the Board while the CEO and CFO pilfer the coffers to buy hookers and blow, and to play the role of fall guy when the whole scam collapses.
by tariqk December 12, 2018
Get the CIOmug. A boundary that forms between what an expert or a genius has every right to say what they like because they are unquestionably an expert about the thing they are talking about, and what they have absolutely no right to comment on because they are so invariably full of shit about it.
Sophopauses may be bound in time — say, for example, after a traumatic or life changing event, after they've smoked a blunt or drank too much alcohol, or may be bound in (metaphorical) space — someone may be completely insightful about certain topics, only to be so fucking stupid in other things.
From the Greek sophía, and the Latin pausa, in the same tradition of English that mashes Greek and Latin words together, because everything is horrible and nothing makes sense.
Sophopauses may be bound in time — say, for example, after a traumatic or life changing event, after they've smoked a blunt or drank too much alcohol, or may be bound in (metaphorical) space — someone may be completely insightful about certain topics, only to be so fucking stupid in other things.
From the Greek sophía, and the Latin pausa, in the same tradition of English that mashes Greek and Latin words together, because everything is horrible and nothing makes sense.
Talking to Dr. Roberts about world politics, race, evolutionary psychology, Bitcoin, or social sciences, while he's drunk? That's a bad move, because you'll cross his sophopause at Mach 3. The man is a brilliant statistician, but hoo boy does he believe in the weirdest conspiracy theories.
by tariqk December 11, 2018
Get the sophopausemug. The act of using mathematical models, statistical analyses and data-centric approaches that are used to justify bullshit policies and terrible strategies. Mathwashing can occur in any stage of the analysis — it can be using the wrong kind of data, using the wrong kind of model, or even making the wrong kind of conclusions from the results provided. Whatever the cause, the results are the same — it uses the sanctity and the so-called objectivity of “math”, “data”, and “science” to justify policies and strategies with destructive, tragic and far-ranging effects.
Telling me that John McAfee said that Bitcoin's mathematics make financial bubbles impossible is mathwashing, George — the mathematical guarantees that the blockchain algorithm only guarantee that the whole damn thing works as a tamper-evident repository of data, not that fraud and asset bubbles are fundamentally impossible. Now, get your head out of your ass, and tell me how much of our life savings did you invest in the damn thing.
by tariqk December 12, 2018
Get the mathwashingmug. Political compass meme term for people who identify with the bottom left corner of the political compass (the "ibertarian-left”), who often proudly tell everyone within earshot that Mahatma Gandhi, Nelson Mandela, Gertrude Stein and Karl Marx are in “their” team, but often ignoring the fact that Mahatma Gandhi was an anti-Semitic proto-Hindutva fundamentalist with weird ideas about women who got killed by another proto-Hindutva fundamentalist for not being fundamentalist enough, Nelson Mandela barely lasted a Presidential term because he was too left for his (arguably, kleptocratic neoliberal) compatriots after being in jail for over 30 years, Gertrude Stein was a cryto-TERF, and no one's been able to effectively implement Karl Marx's ideas for the 140+ years since he died.
In short, political non-entities whose only argument for their “ideology” is that they don't have, by sheer coincidence, genocidal maniacs on their corner of the political compass, mostly because the bar is so low that it excludes coercive state action from their list of acceptable policies.
They have Kropotkin though. Kropotkin's cool.
But still not enough to base an entire political identity on.
In short, political non-entities whose only argument for their “ideology” is that they don't have, by sheer coincidence, genocidal maniacs on their corner of the political compass, mostly because the bar is so low that it excludes coercive state action from their list of acceptable policies.
They have Kropotkin though. Kropotkin's cool.
But still not enough to base an entire political identity on.
Telling me to support your policy proposal “because I'm a libleft uwu” is a terrible idea, Stuart, saying that is the oatmeal of political statements, it just means that you're against coercive state action against anyone, not that you're against with exploitation or structural discrimination, or that your brain is grounded in, you know, actual material circumstances.
by tariqk December 5, 2021
Get the Libleftmug.