15 definitions by tariqk
Like “reinventing the wheel”, but for techbros.
More precisely, it is to spend an incredible amount of money, time and mental effort to finally come to a solution that was actually figured out decades or even centuries ago.
Bonus points if you end up making yet another app using the blockchain, so that in order for you to use it, you need to put your SSN on a distributed public ledger so that it can get pwned by Russian hackers.
More precisely, it is to spend an incredible amount of money, time and mental effort to finally come to a solution that was actually figured out decades or even centuries ago.
Bonus points if you end up making yet another app using the blockchain, so that in order for you to use it, you need to put your SSN on a distributed public ledger so that it can get pwned by Russian hackers.
“Ok, pitch it.”
“Ok so like basically we get people to pool their money together into one thing and then invest that thing into Bitcoin and use the profits from that investment to pay everyone involved once a month, and then when someone dies their portion of the investment goes to the other participants.”
“…you just described a tontine.”
“A what?”
“A tontine. The thing you're describing. It's been around since the 17th century. Are you reinventing the bus again?”
“No way, man! This one's different, this one uses JIT-compiled vue.js and blockchain smart contracts to keep track of the system!”
“Brilliant. Here's a million dollars, we're gonna be rich!”
“Ok so like basically we get people to pool their money together into one thing and then invest that thing into Bitcoin and use the profits from that investment to pay everyone involved once a month, and then when someone dies their portion of the investment goes to the other participants.”
“…you just described a tontine.”
“A what?”
“A tontine. The thing you're describing. It's been around since the 17th century. Are you reinventing the bus again?”
“No way, man! This one's different, this one uses JIT-compiled vue.js and blockchain smart contracts to keep track of the system!”
“Brilliant. Here's a million dollars, we're gonna be rich!”
by tariqk November 22, 2022
Roughly but not exactly.
Like, when you say pareto-80 you don't exactly mean 80 percent, you really mean, roughly four out of five. Pareto-20 means one out of five, and saying that a scheme will likely fail at pareto-5 means it'll go okay so long as we don't roll a natural 1.
Like, when you say pareto-80 you don't exactly mean 80 percent, you really mean, roughly four out of five. Pareto-20 means one out of five, and saying that a scheme will likely fail at pareto-5 means it'll go okay so long as we don't roll a natural 1.
So, like, 20 percent of respondents say that—
That's bullshit, you pulled that number out of your ass.
Pareto-20, man. You're right, it's... (checks notes) closer to 18 percent, but that's not much of a difference, is it?
That's bullshit, you pulled that number out of your ass.
Pareto-20, man. You're right, it's... (checks notes) closer to 18 percent, but that's not much of a difference, is it?
by tariqk July 13, 2022
Chief Information Officer. If you read the industry publications, Chief Information Officers are at the vanguard of today's information-centric workplace. In practice, it's basically some poor schlub who's been given a fancier “IT Manager” hat, who's been given the responsibility to fix the dumpster fire that is your IT Systems, by giving “suggestions” that are roundly ignored by the Board while the CEO and CFO pilfer the coffers to buy hookers and blow, and to play the role of fall guy when the whole scam collapses.
by tariqk December 13, 2018
A boundary that forms between what an expert or a genius has every right to say what they like because they are unquestionably an expert about the thing they are talking about, and what they have absolutely no right to comment on because they are so invariably full of shit about it.
Sophopauses may be bound in time — say, for example, after a traumatic or life changing event, after they've smoked a blunt or drank too much alcohol, or may be bound in (metaphorical) space — someone may be completely insightful about certain topics, only to be so fucking stupid in other things.
From the Greek sophía, and the Latin pausa, in the same tradition of English that mashes Greek and Latin words together, because everything is horrible and nothing makes sense.
Sophopauses may be bound in time — say, for example, after a traumatic or life changing event, after they've smoked a blunt or drank too much alcohol, or may be bound in (metaphorical) space — someone may be completely insightful about certain topics, only to be so fucking stupid in other things.
From the Greek sophía, and the Latin pausa, in the same tradition of English that mashes Greek and Latin words together, because everything is horrible and nothing makes sense.
Talking to Dr. Roberts about world politics, race, evolutionary psychology, Bitcoin, or social sciences, while he's drunk? That's a bad move, because you'll cross his sophopause at Mach 3. The man is a brilliant statistician, but hoo boy does he believe in the weirdest conspiracy theories.
by tariqk December 12, 2018
To actually take into account the costs of retaining a Great Man in any organization. Costs include the number of people said Great Man drives out of the organization due to their behavior, the amount of legal fees that they could expose said organization to due to anti-harassment lawsuits made by other members, organizational reputation loss, etc.
Clarence: …and that's why I recommend that the board does not terminate Mr. Stallman's role in our organization.
Kelly: Okay, go back to slide 15…
Clarence: Got you. What's your question, Kelly?
Kelly: I was afraid of that. You forgot to carry the great man. What happens when you do that, Clarence?
Clarence: Oh, right. Let me put that in the spreadsheet… huh. I guess we should fire Mr. Stallman's ass, then.
Kelly: I was afraid so.
Kelly: Okay, go back to slide 15…
Clarence: Got you. What's your question, Kelly?
Kelly: I was afraid of that. You forgot to carry the great man. What happens when you do that, Clarence?
Clarence: Oh, right. Let me put that in the spreadsheet… huh. I guess we should fire Mr. Stallman's ass, then.
Kelly: I was afraid so.
by tariqk December 6, 2021
A terrible word used by early Millenials (born circa early 1980s) to disassociate themselves from those other younger millenials and to tell their Boomer parents and Gen-Xer elder siblings that they aren't like those other young people, they're not cringe, or whatever it is young people use today, they remember what it was like when VCR was king and TVs were made out of cathode tubes and there was no Internet.
Fallen out of disuse when those so-called Xennials realized that it doesn't matter how not-cringe you are, they're still gonna kill you with wage theft, student debt, and all the other tools of generational class war at their disposal.
Fallen out of disuse when those so-called Xennials realized that it doesn't matter how not-cringe you are, they're still gonna kill you with wage theft, student debt, and all the other tools of generational class war at their disposal.
Unlike those other Millenials, I am a Xennial, and I know what it is like to live without smartphones glued to my face every day.
No one cares, Kathy, we're all getting murdered with student debt, just lift your picket sign higher and shout louder.
No one cares, Kathy, we're all getting murdered with student debt, just lift your picket sign higher and shout louder.
by tariqk December 6, 2021
The act of using mathematical models, statistical analyses and data-centric approaches that are used to justify bullshit policies and terrible strategies. Mathwashing can occur in any stage of the analysis — it can be using the wrong kind of data, using the wrong kind of model, or even making the wrong kind of conclusions from the results provided. Whatever the cause, the results are the same — it uses the sanctity and the so-called objectivity of “math”, “data”, and “science” to justify policies and strategies with destructive, tragic and far-ranging effects.
Telling me that John McAfee said that Bitcoin's mathematics make financial bubbles impossible is mathwashing, George — the mathematical guarantees that the blockchain algorithm only guarantee that the whole damn thing works as a tamper-evident repository of data, not that fraud and asset bubbles are fundamentally impossible. Now, get your head out of your ass, and tell me how much of our life savings did you invest in the damn thing.
by tariqk December 13, 2018