mike oxhard's definitions

Texas Tard

Nickname for George W. Bush, who was actually born in Connecticut. Not used in direct address because no one ever told him what "retard" means or that he is one.

The Texas Tard thinks he can invade Iran without starting World War III.

by Mike Oxhard July 10, 2006

dilbert

1. someone who works in a cubicle at a mind-numbing job.

2. a job that is good practice for being dead or in a coma.

Don't ask him about his job, he's a dilbert.

by Mike Oxhard July 13, 2006

republican

The American political party that protects the interests of the very wealthy and corporations by lowering their tax and regulatory burden, and making it easier for businesses to get cheap labor and cheap natural resources both at home and abroad.

Since the natural constituency for this agenda is very small, the party panders to religious zealots, racists, and the marginally retarded. Fortunately for the Republicans, the issues that activate this base usually cost nothing and have almost no overlap with their actual economic agenda.

Among wealthy: We need a Republican congress to get rid of that dreadful inheritance tax.

Among stupid: It was the Republicans what said we gonna git a flag burning amendment.

by Mike Oxhard August 15, 2006

cottage cheese diet

1. the habit of only having sex with women so obese they have severe cellulite (origin: the cottage cheese appearance of cellulite.

2. anything a woman who has severe cellulite eats .

1. She's too skinny for him, he's on a cottage cheese diet.

2. Damn, women on a cottage cheese diet shouldn't wear bikinis!

by Mike Oxhard July 12, 2006

near queer

Not quite openly gay or consciously aware of being gay.

He said he's not gay, but he's sure as hell near queer.

by Mike Oxhard July 11, 2006

bunghole fever

An obsession to try anal sex.

Ever since he saw that porno, he's had bunghole fever.

by Mike Oxhard July 11, 2006

whegro

A white person who acts like a caricature of a ghetto black. Whegro is generally used by those uncomfortable saying whigger because it is derived from nigger. See also whafrican American

That whegro needs to pull up his pants and get a job.

by Mike Oxhard July 10, 2006