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malarky2020's definitions

fool's mate

A woman not needing the requisite 7 hours of contact prior to sleeping with a man for whom she has just met. This term originates within the PUA community.
Jake - See that blonde over there? I just banged her out in the bathroom.

Marshall - So what, she's a fool's mate. You need to raise your standards if you want to be an mPUA.
by malarky2020 October 5, 2009
mugGet the fool's matemug.

nasal tampon

A small wad of toilet paper or tissue jammed up one's nose in order to prevent the nose from dripping. Often used against a running nose during a cold or flu, or against a bleeding nose. The nasal tampon protected the nose from damage by eliminating the need for repeated wiping.

Nasal tampons are left in all day, or until full, and are often used inconspicuously, just like the real thing.
Doctor Acula - Well, Andrew, your prostrate is clean, but I need to talk to you about something. Sit down.

Andrew - Oh no, what's up?

Doctor Acula - There seems to be some kind of growth in your nose; we think it might be cancerous. Here, take a look at this X-Ray.

Andrew - Oh, that. That's just my nasal tampon. My nose kept dripping onto my xbox controller.

Doctor Acula - Get out of my office.
by malarky2020 March 29, 2010
mugGet the nasal tamponmug.

Back to the Future Day

Celebrated each November 5th, Back to the Future Day is our opportunity to recognize Doc Brown's discovery of the Flux Capacitor, the device that makes time travel possible. Back to the Future Day is celebrated by wishing everyone a Happy Back to the Future Day, and updating your social media networks statuses accordingly.

On November 5th, 1955, Dr. Emmet Lathrop Brown (Doc Brown to his friends), was attempting to hang a clock in his bathroom. As he reached over, he lost his footing , slipped from the toilet that he was standing on, and struck his head against the side of the sink.

Unconscious, Doc had a vision. And that vision was that of a Flux Capacitor — the device that makes time travel possible.

Requiring 1.21 gigawatts of electrical power and to be moving at a speed of 88 mph (142 km/h) the Flux Capacitor allows one to move forward or backwards in time.

Dr. Emmet Brown, on this day in history, we salute you, and remember your red letter date in the history of science!
Back to the Future Day: The Origin Story
Dr. Emmett Brown: Then tell me, "Future Boy", who's President in the United States in 1985?
Marty McFly: Ronald Reagan.
Dr. Emmett Brown: Ronald Reagan? The actor? Then who's VICE-President? Jerry Lewis? I suppose Jane Wyman is the First Lady!
Marty McFly: Whoa! Wait! Doc!
Dr. Emmett Brown: And Jack Benny is Secretary of the Treasury.
Marty McFly: Doc, you gotta listen to me.
Dr. Emmett Brown: I've had enough practical jokes for one evening. Good night, Future Boy!
Marty McFly: No, wait! Doc. Doc. The-the-the bruise - the bruise on your head. I know how that happened! You told me the whole story. You were standing on your toilet, and you were hanging a clock, and you fell, and you hit your head on the sink. And that's when you came up with the idea for the Flux Capacitor... Which... is what makes time travel possible....
by malarky2020 November 5, 2009
mugGet the Back to the Future Daymug.

pylon

A motorist that drives at the posted speed limit or very close to it.

If we consider an observational reference frame at the posted speed limit, these motorists traveling at the posted speed limit are effectively stationary.

On larger roads, these "pylons" can be easily navigated around by any real drivers (motorists that travel safely while well above the posted speed limit).
On the road, there are two types of people:
Drivers, and pylons.
by malarky2020 December 14, 2009
mugGet the pylonmug.

flood

(v.) to fill an entire bar, form, or part with kick drum, played rapidly and without variation.

Power Metal as a genre often uses songs entirely composed of flooding.

While flooding can be interesting when used in moderation, it is often relied upon by less skilled drummers to make their playing sound either heavier or faster.
Zack - I think we might need to fire Kevin. We write really great parts, but he has a propensity to just flood through them all.

Marty - You should have figured, I mean your drummer is just an orangutan you stole from the zoo and taught to play drums.

Zack - Where else would we find a drummer that looks like Animal from the Muppets?
by malarky2020 December 17, 2009
mugGet the floodmug.

g-bomb

Rebuffing a woman's advances by discussing details of your life that include your girlfriend (or significant other), in order to tactlessly let her know that you are in a committed relationship.

Each specific mention of the girlfriend (or significant other) is known as "dropping the g-bomb"
Cameron - Man those those hot bitches were all over us last night. The triplets kept begging me to take them home.

Gary - No kidding holmes; you were dropping the g-bomb like every 10 seconds. Yo you need to lose that dog-ass ball and chain and all her baggage; get in the game son.

Cameron - My daughter has Down syndrome Gary, and Sarah is an excellent provider. If you talk about either of them that way again, I'll rip your throat out.
by malarky2020 October 5, 2009
mugGet the g-bombmug.

acquisitionist

A media & software hoarder. A person who's bandwidth, storage space, and desire to acquire intellectual property greatly exceed their ability or availability to enjoy even a small percentage of it.

Not to be confused with the typical obsessive collector: the acquisitionist distinguishes his or herself by having enough media to require several human lifetimes to even watch / play / listen to it all.
Maxwell: Hey Jorge, want to come over to my house and hang out? I just bought five new terabyte drives and I've already loaded them up with 1000 new movies, the entire N64, PS1, PS2 and Game Cube catalogs, the Virgin music catalog, and 10,000 hours of porn.

Jorge: Ok, I guess that might be alright. Hey how's your daughter doing? I hear she's started walking?

Maxwell: I wouldn't actually know; I'm an acquisitionist now; I tend to spend every waking hour downloading.

Jorge: Look, I've got to be somewhere.
by malarky2020 October 19, 2009
mugGet the acquisitionistmug.

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