joe995's definitions

Bachelor Cart

The small, narrow shopping carts at grocery stores and supermarkets. So called due the nature of the cart - it lacks the seat, leg openings and seatbelt found on larger shopping carts, where a little kid can sit. Doesn't hold much groceries, but the botton shelf is perfect for a case of beer. Often used by single people who have no kids, like a Bachelor for example.

Bob had no kids and is single, so he doesn't need a full sized cart because he's not getting much groceries . A Bachelor Cart will do.

by joe995 August 3, 2025

Driven Through Ukraine

To describe a particularly bad experience while driving anywhere. Bonus points for damage to the car and some mental trauma.

God damn, that was a horrible commute in that heavy traffic during that storm! I might as well have Driven Through Ukraine!

by joe995 August 1, 2025

Yokel Stoplight

A stoplight (traffic light) located at the intersection of a VERY busy highway - and a local road in a tiny little town in the middle of nowhere, where the highway passes through. The stoplight has EQUAL time at "red" (stop) on both the highway and the road. As a result, at rush hour, the highway traffic is backed up for miles, while there is few, if any vehicles on the local road. The locals don't care, but the traffic slowdown effects businesses, livelihoods and sanity in the bigger cities at either end of the highway.

(Driving to work) Aw man! There seems to be a traffic jam up ahead - oh wait...(looks at Google Maps)...it's just a Yokel Stoplight on this route. Should've took the interstate instead.

by joe995 April 19, 2025

Ukraine Insane

When the level of insanity and/or madness in a situation gets to a point where a war is started, and there is international outcry.

"Dude, the party we had last weekend was so crazy, there was a big brawl between the girls, that they still keep hot to this day, and the foreign exchange student, who was there, wrote an angry comment about it on Reddit. The whole thing was Ukraine Insane!"

by joe995 April 11, 2025

J. D. Vance

To have sex with a couch.

"I got so high last night, I did a J. D. Vance with my sofa, and left a few love stains."

by joe995 January 14, 2025

Fairy Dance

When a girl jerks, shakes and jolts her legs while having a particularly strong orgasm.

Jenny played with he new vibrator. Her legs were shaking so much, so was doing the Fairy Dance!

by joe995 October 22, 2024

Horse Race Enthusiasts

The Media, in their coverage of just about every election since the founding of our country.

Person watching news: "Wow! The candidates are running neck and neck!"

Other person: "Don't be silly - that's just a bunch of Horse Race Enthusiasts, twisting the polls for ratings. Ignore them - and just go out and VOTE!"

by joe995 October 21, 2024