mastastic

adj.

When something is so good you could jank to it.

Also, a really amazing masterbatory session.
Christ, you see that short skirt? Bitch be mastastic son!

I know, I had a mastastic jank sess to her the other night, I'm still sore!
by jimmy patrick February 19, 2008
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jerk jacket

A special rain slicker worn while masterbating to deter any errant cum strands.

Also refers to a condom worn only to jerk off into.
Whoa, whoa, hold your horses there tiger, lemme get my jerk jacket on first!
by jimmy patrick February 19, 2008
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ouch!

What people always say when I stick my huge cock in them.
Ouch! I was expecting the length, but not the girth!
by jimmy patrick March 03, 2008
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shit prints

The muddy foot prints left on toilet seats by whatever nasty bastard still hasn’t learned how to navigate a modern bathroom.
Gross, I went to use the bathroom right after some dude from India, and there were shit prints all over the toilet seat! I guess I'll hold it.
by Jimmy Patrick February 26, 2008
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volkmann

volk-man
n.
1.
a. Disorder in which the testicles become intertwined, as caused by tight undergarments or tying with string or rubberbands, often leading to strangulation and/or death of one or both testes.

b. A wrestling hold in which one opponent tugs or twists the testes of another.

c. A sharp pain in the testicals or scrotum.

2.
n. (American Slang)
a. A person, usually female, who is known for being especially rough with her partners' genitals.

b. An annoying bitch who is nothing but a pain in the balls.
Long story short, I slept in my whitey tighties and developed a wicked volkmann, so they had to amputate my left nut.
by Jimmy Patrick December 28, 2007
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chape

when you rape someone and cheat on your partner at the same time.
Damn, that bitch was so fine I just HAD to chape her! I hope my girl don't find out!
by jimmy patrick February 14, 2008
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blood

Blood is the best lube ever!
by jimmy patrick February 21, 2008
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