Person 1: I bet that secretary is good at dick-tation.
Person 2: That porn star was actually a good actress. She had really good dick-tion.
Person 3: A friend of mine went downtown to hire a male prostitute. I guess he wanted an Urban Dick-tionary.
Person 4 (the mature one who has had enough): Will you all stop with the Dict Jokes?
Person 2: That porn star was actually a good actress. She had really good dick-tion.
Person 3: A friend of mine went downtown to hire a male prostitute. I guess he wanted an Urban Dick-tionary.
Person 4 (the mature one who has had enough): Will you all stop with the Dict Jokes?
by Jfman August 09, 2018
I had to throw away someone else’s K-Cup and fill the reservoir, just to get a cup of coffee. But that’s OK, I don’t mind showing some Keurig Courtesy.
by Jfman August 30, 2018
Person 1 - Where's Matt?
Person 2 - He's home looking at the JCPenney site for a new coupon. He has FOMO YOLO BOGO.
Person 2 - He's home looking at the JCPenney site for a new coupon. He has FOMO YOLO BOGO.
by Jfman June 27, 2018
The unfortunate horizontal marking across a woman’s abdomen when she wears ridiculously tight yoga pants while simultaneously wearing a panty liner.
by Jfman November 16, 2018
I really have to pee. But I don’t want to get out of bed. I wonder if I can make it through the night without having an accident? Is it really that bad to have an accident? No one will know. I probably need to change the sheets anyway. Maybe I should just go ahead and get up to pee now since I’m awake after going through this pee flow tree.
by Jfman August 30, 2018
Me: I still think “Fumbling Towards Ecstasy” is one of the greatest albums ever made.
Millennial: You mean, Sarah McLachlan, I thought she just wrote songs about abused animals.
Millennial: You mean, Sarah McLachlan, I thought she just wrote songs about abused animals.
by Jfman December 25, 2018
Damnit, we’re out of cookies. All we have is an 8-year old box of Nilla Wafers in the back of the pantry.
by Jfman August 09, 2018