jake's definitions
One who enjoys tatooing dirty homosexual phrases upon the genetalia of their fruity companions. Not be be confused with a mere toatooist tatooing a penis, the cock author does it solely for pleasure and not for profit.
Hans: Were you invited to Bjorn's tatoo party?
Wilhelm: I wouldn't go over there if I were you. He's not a tatooist. He's a freakin cock author.
Hans: Oh shit...
Wilhelm: I wouldn't go over there if I were you. He's not a tatooist. He's a freakin cock author.
Hans: Oh shit...
by JakE May 21, 2007
Get the cock authormug. Player A uses a 'nade on a room killing Players B, C, and D. Player E then proceeds to sneak up on him and brutally rape him with a melee weapon.
by Jake May 7, 2004
Get the n00btacularmug. by jake April 11, 2005
Get the g unit!mug. what you wipe your asshole and your twat with, right before you allow the guy to go down on you (assuming that you did have a bath or shower before the date started)
It was obvious we were going to have sex, I used a fresh Wet Nap for my ass, then another to wipe my pussy, just in case he wanted to go down on me.....Sara
by Jake January 20, 2004
Get the Wet Napmug. a lubricated polyethylene sheath that is inserted into the vagina. A ring grasps the bottom of the cervix. The sheath extends outside the labia. They are expensive, but most guys don't even know they are there unless they explore with fingers. You can buy disposable underpants with these things in place so that the woman can go out on a date all set to fuck "protected".
Susie used a female condom the first time, that way there was no interruption to put on a male condom.
by Jake February 3, 2004
Get the female condommug. We were best of friends, I treated her like the lady she was. One night she decided to offer me her v-unit. That was when I learned she was a virgin.
by Jake January 10, 2004
Get the v-unitmug. A social get-together that involved the auctioning off of boxed lunches prepared by the women. A potential sweetheart might let her man of choice know how she had decorated the box she prepared so that he would try harder to be the one to successfully buy it at auction. This was a way for young women to show off their meal-making skills. He who bought the lunch would share the meal with the one who prepared it.
My grandparents met this way; my grandmother was Amish and my Scottish grandfather paid a HUGE price to purchase her box lunch.
My grandparents met this way; my grandmother was Amish and my Scottish grandfather paid a HUGE price to purchase her box lunch.
Violet decorated her box lunch with daisies so that Milton would know which one to bid on at the box social.
by Jake February 3, 2004
Get the box socialmug.