hazletard-in-chief's definitions
A swing with accessibility to the rider's genitalia/anus. Supposedly invented in the far east. It could be as simple as a hammock, or as complex as an injection molded custom fit unit upwards of $1500.
me: Let's go down to my sex dungeon, and try out my new Chinese swing. It has thermionic heating and cooling.
some chick: Damn you know how to fuck in luxury.
me: You're making me blush.
some chick: Damn you know how to fuck in luxury.
me: You're making me blush.
by Hazletard-in-Chief October 31, 2011
Get the Chinese swing mug.A form of mutal masturbation, in which a yeast infected woman hangs by her feet, while a man mastubates her. He catches soft yeast falling from her vagina on his penis, and she uses it as lubricant, to masturbate his penis.
pervert: I love your fishy stank all over my cock.
bitch: Hope you enjoy it, I didn't clean my snatch for several weeks.
pervert: The hazleton with cheese is the bomb.
bitch: Hope you enjoy it, I didn't clean my snatch for several weeks.
pervert: The hazleton with cheese is the bomb.
by Hazletard-in-Chief December 11, 2010
Get the hazleton with cheese mug.When a man holds his balls together tightly, and fists a Domincan prostitute's asshole with the balls.
nigga: I would sure like to give you a Hazleton Nut Thrust.
Domincan Ho: (unintelligble Dominican jibbersh)
nigga: Oh yeah. Take it like a white biatch!
Dominican Ho: two dollars.
nigga: Damn your pricey.
Domincan Ho: (unintelligble Dominican jibbersh)
nigga: Oh yeah. Take it like a white biatch!
Dominican Ho: two dollars.
nigga: Damn your pricey.
by Hazletard-in-Chief November 22, 2010
Get the Hazleton Nut Thrust mug.detective 1: I'm out here on Highland Road again, looking at another dead prostitute. What a waste.
detective 2: I know. That bitch could be making money sucking and fucking. At least a couple grand on Friday night, alone. It's a damn shame.
detective 1: I believe they call it Hazletonian cost-benefit analysis. It's a form of nigger logic.
detective 2: I know. That bitch could be making money sucking and fucking. At least a couple grand on Friday night, alone. It's a damn shame.
detective 1: I believe they call it Hazletonian cost-benefit analysis. It's a form of nigger logic.
by Hazletard-in-Chief December 8, 2010
Get the Hazletonian cost-benefit analysis mug.A form of exhibitionism, in which a white female tween pushes her naked rear up to a chain link fence, while two Dominican males separately penetrate the women's anus and vagina, through the fence. Very common in Hazleton, Pennsylvania.
Perez: Check out that bitch with the iCarly backpack, signaling us into a Hazletonian Glory Hole.
Carlos: You get the asshole this time, I am sick of scraping shit out of my foreskin.
Carlos: You get the asshole this time, I am sick of scraping shit out of my foreskin.
by Hazletard-in-Chief December 11, 2010
Get the Hazletonian Glory Hole mug.An unidentified man died in the waiting area of Hazleton General Hospital. He bled to death, because of the wait behind thirty illegal immigrant tweenage bitches checking to see if they were pregnant.
by Hazletard-in-Chief December 10, 2010
Get the Hazleton General Hospital mug.