Definitions by hazletard-in-chief
Hazletonmobile
The primary mode of transportation in Hazleton, PA, seen outside of every home: A stolen shopping cart!
hazletard 1: Got any WD-40, my ride needs a tune up.
hazletard 2: Ditch that bitch. I got this fly Hazletonmobile, from GIANT Food. No I can go Hazleton drifting, this afternoon.
hazletard 2: Ditch that bitch. I got this fly Hazletonmobile, from GIANT Food. No I can go Hazleton drifting, this afternoon.
Hazletonmobile by Hazletard-in-Chief December 11, 2010
hazleton with cheese
A form of mutal masturbation, in which a yeast infected woman hangs by her feet, while a man mastubates her. He catches soft yeast falling from her vagina on his penis, and she uses it as lubricant, to masturbate his penis.
pervert: I love your fishy stank all over my cock.
bitch: Hope you enjoy it, I didn't clean my snatch for several weeks.
pervert: The hazleton with cheese is the bomb.
bitch: Hope you enjoy it, I didn't clean my snatch for several weeks.
pervert: The hazleton with cheese is the bomb.
hazleton with cheese by Hazletard-in-Chief December 11, 2010
hazleton
A style of mutual masturbation, in which a woman hangs upside-down, while her male partner stands rightside up.
man: This hazleton, is the bomb. We got to do it more often.
woman: Shut the fuck up, and work my clit!
woman: Shut the fuck up, and work my clit!
hazleton by Hazletard-in-Chief December 11, 2010
Hazleton Hot Pocket
A necrophilia and coprophilia based sex act, in which a hazletard removes a corpse's head, defecates in the esophagus, and has sex with the esophagus.
hazletard: Nothing like visting the morgue at Hazleton General Hospital, and pulling off a Hazleton Hot Pocket!
Hazleton Hot Pocket by Hazletard-in-Chief December 10, 2010
Hazleton General Hospital
An unidentified man died in the waiting area of Hazleton General Hospital. He bled to death, because of the wait behind thirty illegal immigrant tweenage bitches checking to see if they were pregnant.
Hazleton General Hospital by Hazletard-in-Chief December 10, 2010
Hazletonian cost-benefit analysis
detective 1: I'm out here on Highland Road again, looking at another dead prostitute. What a waste.
detective 2: I know. That bitch could be making money sucking and fucking. At least a couple grand on Friday night, alone. It's a damn shame.
detective 1: I believe they call it Hazletonian cost-benefit analysis. It's a form of nigger logic.
detective 2: I know. That bitch could be making money sucking and fucking. At least a couple grand on Friday night, alone. It's a damn shame.
detective 1: I believe they call it Hazletonian cost-benefit analysis. It's a form of nigger logic.
Hazletonian cost-benefit analysis by Hazletard-in-Chief December 8, 2010
Berwick Lights
The nickname for "The Berwick, Pennsylvania Jaycees' Christmas Boulevard" annual display. The display claims to be "over a mile of lights", meaning it utilizes upwards of a mile of strung lights, not that the display is actually a mile long. The display is located on the Market Street median directly in front of Berwick City Hall/The Jackson Mansion. It is actually quite popular in Northeastern Pennsylvania.
Berwick Lights by Hazletard-in-Chief December 5, 2010