Definitions by hazletard-in-chief
scamotz
1. a confectionery mixture made of: one part low grade Mozzarella cheese, one part American cheese and three parts hydrogenated vegetable oil. Found on cheap pizza and other Italian influenced American foods. 2. semen
Maria: I almost choked to death on some scamotz, last night.
Jennifer: The cheap Italian stuff, or the testicle gravy?
Maria: Both, actually.
Jennifer: The cheap Italian stuff, or the testicle gravy?
Maria: Both, actually.
scamotz by Hazletard-in-Chief December 11, 2010
Nationwide Thugs
The nonexistent gang, all the the wiggers in Hazleton claim to be a member of. Sometimes shortened to "Nationwide."
hazletard: I'm in da Nationwide Thugs, yo. I'll cap your ass.
human: Does the Aryan Brotherhood, now except wiggers? That's the prison gang that runs the white section in state prison. That's were crackers like you go, when you keep this act up into adulthood.
hazletard: Watch your mouth fool. Nationwide will fuck you up.
human: Thanks, for all the footage of your terroristic threats, for my new cellphone. Enjoy prison, biznitch!
hazletard: I'm sorry. Don't call the police. I just act like this, because I'm a loser.
human: Does the Aryan Brotherhood, now except wiggers? That's the prison gang that runs the white section in state prison. That's were crackers like you go, when you keep this act up into adulthood.
hazletard: Watch your mouth fool. Nationwide will fuck you up.
human: Thanks, for all the footage of your terroristic threats, for my new cellphone. Enjoy prison, biznitch!
hazletard: I'm sorry. Don't call the police. I just act like this, because I'm a loser.
Nationwide Thugs by Hazletard-in-Chief December 11, 2010
Gallagher Sledge-O-Matic
1. The signature sketch of prop comic Gallagher, in which he smashes miscellaneous items with a large mallet not an actual sledgehammer. Apparently, a sledgehammer is too heterosexual. 2. A potent strain of methamphetamine, named after the above prop comic. Originating from around Hazleton, Pennsylvania. Taken orally, intravenously, anally, vaginally, nasally and smoked. The original lab was raided at the dawn of 2010, but is back in operation.
1. douche bag: I brought the clear plastic tarp for Gallagher's show. Hope he brings the Gallagher Sledge-O-Matic. Hee hee hee.
2. hazletard: I need a quarter hit of some Gallagher Sledge-O-Matic, bad. So I can suck truck driver cock for enough cash for a full hit, no homo.
2. hazletard: I need a quarter hit of some Gallagher Sledge-O-Matic, bad. So I can suck truck driver cock for enough cash for a full hit, no homo.
Gallagher Sledge-O-Matic by Hazletard-in-Chief December 11, 2010
Hazletonian Glory Hole
A form of exhibitionism, in which a white female tween pushes her naked rear up to a chain link fence, while two Dominican males separately penetrate the women's anus and vagina, through the fence. Very common in Hazleton, Pennsylvania.
Perez: Check out that bitch with the iCarly backpack, signaling us into a Hazletonian Glory Hole.
Carlos: You get the asshole this time, I am sick of scraping shit out of my foreskin.
Carlos: You get the asshole this time, I am sick of scraping shit out of my foreskin.
Hazletonian Glory Hole by Hazletard-in-Chief December 11, 2010
Highland Road
nigga 1: We need to dump this ho's body somewhere, she's getting ripe.
nigga 2: I know a place where I dumped an old couch, refrigerator and dead ho last week. I found it, while geocaching.
nigga 1: Geocaching?! We need to blacken you up. It' bad enough your a registered Republican, but fucking geocaching. Nigga Please!
nigga 2: Fuck you. Here we are... Highland Road biatch!
nigga 2: I know a place where I dumped an old couch, refrigerator and dead ho last week. I found it, while geocaching.
nigga 1: Geocaching?! We need to blacken you up. It' bad enough your a registered Republican, but fucking geocaching. Nigga Please!
nigga 2: Fuck you. Here we are... Highland Road biatch!
Highland Road by Hazletard-in-Chief December 11, 2010
Hazleton drifting
A form of racing, in which a shopping cart is forced into a over-steer. Popular in Hazleton, PA, because cars and gasoline aren't covered by food stamps.
Hazleton drifting by Hazletard-in-Chief December 11, 2010
bloody hazleton
A form of mutual masturbation, in which heavily menstruating woman hangs upside-down while her male partner masturbates her. He catches any falling menstrual blood with his penis, which his partner uses as lubricant to masturbate him.
bloody hazleton by Hazletard-in-Chief December 11, 2010