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Total Station

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A surveying instrument that is a combined theodolite and distomat resulting in a single unit cabable of measuring both distance and angle.
Boss: Hey, use that total station and set out the kerbline for the new road.
Surveyor: No. I prefer using it to spy on the girls changing room.
Boss: Let me see!!
by Digitalnonsense November 11, 2006
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Joe Mangled

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A Scottish term used to describe the state of a person after heavy consumption of alcohol, drugs or both.
Taken from the Ramsey Street character Joe Mangle in the Australian soap opera Neighbours.
Sir Sean Connery: So, did you end up going out last night?
Clubber: Too right I did! I ended up in The Arches and I was pure Joe Mangled! What a night!
Sir Sean Connery: You are the reason I don't live in Scotland.
Clubber: Really? Well double o this ya cunt! *headbuts Sir Sean*
by Digitalnonsense November 11, 2006
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Wheelbarrowing

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A popular pastime enjoyed by young and old alike.
You must first pick your animal or person to wheel barrow then pour lighter fluid on its face. Set this alight and then raise the animals back legs up, insert your hard cock, and run as far along a rural (or motorway for those city slickers)road as you can before the animal dies, stops running on its front legs and starts to turn into mince as you push it along the road.

Sheep are often used due to their accomodating height and durable build. You can get five times further along the road wheelbarroing a sheep as compared to a sheep dog.
Tourist: (Driving along an unlight country road with his family in his people carrier) Honey, what the hell is that coming towards us?
Honey: It...it..it seems to be a man wheelbarrowing a sheep?!
Tourist: Get your camera ready kids!
Honey: I'm gay. I want a divorce.
by Digitalnonsense November 11, 2006
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A controversial 1991 novel written by American author Bret Easton Ellis.
Set in the boom and bust 1980's, the book centres around 26 year old Wall Street businessman Patrick Bateman and his dark psychotic journey of mental unstability as he tries to solve the conflict between his need to fit in and his battle against anonymity.

The novel features some exceptionally graphic violence, often of a sexual nature, and leaves the reader unsure of whether the violence is only in Bateman's head or is in fact happening.

An excellent book and movie but one that should maybe be avoided on first dates....unless you want your date to know you plan to smash their head in with a well polished axe.

The book was made into a Holywood film in 2000 and starred Christian Bale.
Quotes:

"Then, turning her over again, her body weak with fear, I cut all the flesh off around her mouth and using the power drill with a detachable, massive head I widen that hole while she shakes, protesting, and once I'm satisfied with the size of the hole I've created, her mouth open as wide as possible, a reddish black tunnel of twisted tongue and loosened teeth, I force my hand down, deep in her throat, until it dissappears up to my wrist"

American Psycho makes for excellent childrens bed time reading!
by Digitalnonsense November 11, 2006
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Square Of Death

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A drinking game played by those in the know, Ninjas and visionaries.

The game requires several players, alcohol and a pack of cards.
After the initial "initiation" rounds, the players are left with four dealt cards and then enter The Square Of Death - which is ALWAYS marked by all players making an outline of a square with both hands then mimicking the cutting of their own throats.

The square of death is made of a 4 x 4 square of cards and each card carries a differing level of drink penalty or nomination.

There are no winners....just very drunken players.
Legend has it that Elvis, George Best, Ollie Reed and Jimi Hendrix are actually still locked in a game of Square of Death and have not actually died at all.

JFK's head exploded when he thought back to the game of Square of Death he had played the previous night.

Pilot: Hey, our flight is pushed back 2 hours...whuddya wanna do?
Co-Pilot: Square of Death?
Pilot: Good call.
by Digitalnonsense November 11, 2006
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Spin wank

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The act of male masturbation known as wanking, but with a crowd pleasing climax. The wankee takes centre stage in a circle of wankers and tugs hard on his genitals until they near climax. At this point the wankee then starts to spin creating a spunk loaded version of russian roulette as their sticky load will soon be spurting on a random circle wanker. This recipient of the man-cream soaking then has to take their place in the centre of the circle.
This takes place until at least one person collapses due to fatigue or the police are called.
There are no winners. Just wankers.
Mother: Frank, why is your t-shirt all stained?
Frank: Coz I was with the guys spin wanking all day!
Mother: What's a spin wank?
Frank: (Starts tugging and spinning) Ahhhh take that you hot bitch!
by Digitalnonsense November 10, 2006
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roman shower

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Hardcore oral sex whereby a man (or strap-on wearing woman) enjoys receiving oral sex and, in a bid to appeal to their darker side, then stimulates the vomit inducing throat triger areas resulting in their partner throwing up on their cock.
Term takes it's name from the Ancient Roman act of gorging on too much food then heading to the vomitorium to make some more room....hence roman shower!
He: What did you have for dinner, Darling?
She: Far too much Honey. I feel queasy.
He: Great....barf on this ya bitch and give me a Roman Shower!
She: Gobble gobble blurrrggh
He: Thats gross, but sexy, but gross.
by Digitalnonsense November 9, 2006
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