7 definitions by clem
by clem November 13, 2003
"Hip" abbreviation of "London Metropolitan University" recently adopted under its new image change drive. A byword for crippling bureaucracy as well as a focal point for no talent 'Meeja' student wannabes with Ipods and ironic t-shirts talking crap about Marxism while playing with their greasy ponytails.
I tried to take a crap at LondonMet but had to fill this form out in triplicate and get it stamped by Jesus. I should expect my toilet validation smartcard in 6 to eight weeks, at least thats what the guy with the crap ponytail in a Magic Roundabout t-shirt said while trying to get me to buy a copy of "The Socialist Worker"...
by clem February 23, 2005
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Ireland is at the western-most edge of Europe, and a rather wonderful edge it is. Its people, along with the Americans and Asians have salvaged the English language as an artistic force. Unfortunately Ireland harbours a peculier condition whereby everything North American, regardless of its stupidity, is considered exceptionally 'grand'.
Coupled with this Ireland has a tendency for its less educated, yet more vocal 10% of the population to bleat nonsense about 'Black and Tans' and generally deride the English, this is regardless of the fact that during WW2, the joint would have become Hitler's private golfing resort without them.
It is a site of:
Unmatched art and culture
Willful ignorance, hypocricy and begrudgery
A technically perfect quasi-socialist Government
High rural suicide rates
Inflatable tri-colour hammers
Heaney
Yeats
Shaw
Friel
Bogs
Casual racism
Cultural openness
Challenging, maddening, gorgeous women
Rampant alcoholism
Men with square heads
Ginger children
People called Seamus
Passports with harps on them
Crap roads
Introspection
Bosco the puppet
Stereotypically superior potatos
Coupled with this Ireland has a tendency for its less educated, yet more vocal 10% of the population to bleat nonsense about 'Black and Tans' and generally deride the English, this is regardless of the fact that during WW2, the joint would have become Hitler's private golfing resort without them.
It is a site of:
Unmatched art and culture
Willful ignorance, hypocricy and begrudgery
A technically perfect quasi-socialist Government
High rural suicide rates
Inflatable tri-colour hammers
Heaney
Yeats
Shaw
Friel
Bogs
Casual racism
Cultural openness
Challenging, maddening, gorgeous women
Rampant alcoholism
Men with square heads
Ginger children
People called Seamus
Passports with harps on them
Crap roads
Introspection
Bosco the puppet
Stereotypically superior potatos
Ireland generally is confused, self-contradictory, flawed and possibly the most honestly human place on Earth because of it. Thank fuck for that...
by clem November 21, 2005
God: Thou shalt button up thine fly or I shall become wroth with thee!
Guy: Uhhh, nay(?)
<KAZAMM>
Child: Wah, scream, crap, cash drain etc...
Guy: Oh crud
God: I told thee...
Chick: Wheres my 75% share of your salary?
Guy: Oh crud
God: DONT say I didnt tell thee...
Guy: Uhhh, nay(?)
<KAZAMM>
Child: Wah, scream, crap, cash drain etc...
Guy: Oh crud
God: I told thee...
Chick: Wheres my 75% share of your salary?
Guy: Oh crud
God: DONT say I didnt tell thee...
by clem February 21, 2005
by clem March 16, 2005
An individual so singularly dedicated to pussy ingestion that pussy becomes the main component of said individuals diet...
That Martin is such a cuntivore, last time he sneezed a tampon was blasted from his left nostril travelling almost 40 yards at speeds approaching 74 mph..
by clem February 12, 2005