bob beeflips's definitions

bark fight

When two or more dogs in a neighborhood engage in a seemingly endless vocal argument.

Pug: arf!
Peke: rarf! rarf!
German Shepherd: WOOF! WOOF! WOOF!
(pause)
Pug: arf!
(translation)
Pug: My master is best!
Peke: You're wrong - my master is best!
German Shepherd: MINE! MINE! MINE!
(pause)
Pug: I have won the bark fight.

by bob beeflips September 2, 2009

Nothing but flush

The ability for a guy to accurately aim his stream of pee without hitting the pee pond, thereby avoiding awkward splashing.

Guy: whew! I feel 10 pounds lighter.

Girl: what? What did you do?
Guy: took a giant piss.

Girl: I didn't hear a thing.

Guy: nothing but flush.

by bob beeflips September 11, 2014

Death to my enemies!

Originally the battle cry raised when all three opponents in the card game hearts take points and you take none, the phrase used when you generally own everyone in a verbal argument.

Kukla: God cannot exist.
Fran: Obviously. An all-powerful God cannot be reconciled with an evil world.
Ollie: Two words: Free will.

(stunned silence) Death to my enemies!

by bob beeflips June 25, 2009

lap nap

A power nap taken on a plane, bus or train where you use your knees as pillows.

Tori was so tired on the flight to New Orleans that she took a lap nap.

by bob beeflips September 29, 2010

rent an ear

The act of pulling a single ear bud out, so that you can continue to listen to your music while starting a relatively unimportant conversation. Based on the Shakespeare quote, "Friends, Romans, countrymen, lend me your ears."

T: Here comes that annoying JW.
B (listening to ipod): What?
T: Jesse White is coming. She's always talking about her stupid vegetarian phase.
B: I'm in the middle of "The Nazz," by Lord Buckley, but I guess I'll rent an ear.

by bob beeflips May 11, 2010

mano-womano

A verbal clash between male and female. Pronounced like the Spanish/Italian phrase "mano-a-mano."

T: Did you see Nicole and and Jared last night? I thought they were going to come to blows over Oregon versus Big Train chai.
B: Yep, that was epic mano-womano.

by bob beeflips October 19, 2009

potty mail

Smart phone emails sent while on the toilet. Not to be confused with "pot-email," which is email sent while in Washington state.

Fern: I just got your email, but I also just saw you come out of the john.
Jones: I had the time and inclination - I sent you a potty mail.

by bob beeflips October 4, 2012