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Wm. Wallace The Freedom Fighter's definitions

prosecution

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1. Another word for The Man. Gets you busted for possession of marijuana, copying DVDs, and other "crimes". Never ever in a Gogolplexian years does the prosecution do a good thing for yourself.

2. What you'll be on the receiving end of if you screw up.
1. In Heaven the prosecution is spiritually incapable of winning ever.
2. Violators subject to prosecution.
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elven

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Of the elves or having to do with elves, the fairytale creature. Usually not used when referring to short Santa's elves.
I know a girl who has elven pointy ears.
An elven lifespan is very long.
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William Wallace

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The real one: Wears A Kilt. Rolls in the mud with said kilt on. Has a two-handed Claymore sword. Chops off people's legs with said sword. Fought against the warriors of Edward The Longshanks.

The faerytale William Wallace: fights Longshanks to the death, Longshank's blood dripping down Wallace's face while he does a sword dance around his bloody claymore. He then slits open Longshank's wife's chest and removes her guts.
1. William Wallace was the bravest Scotsman to ever exist.

2. William Wallace was the goriest Scotsman to not exist.
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percentometer

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The progress bar that fills up as a file downloads/program installs, etc. So called because it usually has some numbers in percent. Pronounced Percent-oh-meter.
A:How much longer do you have to download that pr0n?
B:The percentometer says about 69 percent done.
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What a human has done who thinks the only meaning of life is to make more life. Often has 6 or more children, wants to get free paychecks, has many spouses (consecutively or concurrently), wants time off from work, and doesn't believe in either condoms or abstinence.
Heather's grandmother bred like a nymphomaniac rabbit on Viagra. She had 17 children, each and every one a body mass index of 40.
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LQI

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Lower Quality Individual. Someone who has at least two of the following traits:
1. Abuses controlled substances.
2. Breeds so much that they can't take care of their children and instead calls up the politicians to force a nanny-state to do the parenting for them.
3. Has been convicted of more than a traffic violation and has been in trouble of the law.
4. Steals from family and stores.
5. Borrows money from you and borrows more the very next day with no intention of paying it back.
6. Anyone with an ego problem/small penis who acts more macho than they should.
7. Someone who had premarital sex.
8. Someone who was married, and isn't married anymore, and death had no part in it.
9. Drinks alcohol to extreme and may have killed someone and got away with premeditated murder.
Don't go to that town, it's full of LQI's.

I know a LQI in my neighborhood.
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A public restroom missing so much as ONE of these 21st century features:
1. Infrared automatic faucets that stay on as long as you are moving your hands
2. Automatic hand dryer and/or automatic paper towels
3. Self flushing toilet/urinal
4. Automatic soap
Don't go in that McDonalds down the street if you have 7 year diarrhea, they only have a twentieth century bathroom.
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