Marcy was scrolling the internet and came across a news item about Trump being in-debt to Saudi Arabia, which showed a pic of TFG holding a glowing ball. She called to her roommate, Diane, to come over. "Di, WTF? that looks like a seance!" and Di replied, "no, hon. that's Orb Fondling." they both laughed and went to lunch.
by Uncle Joosie April 06, 2022
Bob was having trouble peeing and, after a physical showed high PSA levels, his doc broke the news. “you have prostate cancer but it’s very treatable.” Bob went home and told wife Barb about his faulty walnut.
by Uncle Joosie March 23, 2022
Travis the 6-year-old finished up bath time and got out. Bob, his dad, said “do the Dalmatian Shake!” and Travis shook off the bath water just like a Dalmatian who just came out of the lake
by Uncle Joosie March 20, 2025
Bob finished a bubble bath and his partner Karla was brushing her teeth. After he got out, Karla told him to "do the Dalmatian Shake!" and Bob rolled his eyes
by Uncle Joosie March 27, 2025
repressed stuck-up Christian Mike Pence—JC Penney catalog-idea of almost-handsome—debated Kamala Harris and had a house fly land on his head. When the fly's regurgitation interacted with Pence's hairspray he instantly transformed into Fly Girl Pence; filed for divorce from Karen; and admitted being in a long-term affair with a fella named Eduardo.
by Uncle Joosie October 08, 2020
after exchanging niceties and compliments with his new match, Bartholomew saw the dreaded "What brings you on?" pop up in his Tinder chat with Beatrice. "my fucking god," he thought, "why do people ask that dumb fucking question? what brings me on? I used my fingers swiping an app that probably sells my location data. fuck off, lady" and he immediately unmatched
by Uncle Joosie May 02, 2022
Lunatic right-wing assholes' favorite pastime is blaming others for their own shortcomings. Red States are banning Drag Queen Story Hour and conflating drag with being Transgender, which are, of course, not the same. Either way, #NotADragQueen gets to trending on Birdapp when some RW dingus gets arrested for sexually assaulting minors; general sex-trafficking; or any other violent, illegal offense they blame drag queens for.
by Uncle Joosie April 01, 2023