hoedown

(n.) What a police officer says on his radio after encountering an injured or dead prostitute.

"Unit 3 - we have a hoedown! Clear?"

by Rob Porter January 03, 2009

munching monkey

(v. gerund) A euphemism for eating pussy.

Belinda and Stephanie got together for a 69 and ended up munching monkey all night long.

by Rob Porter December 24, 2007

loogie

(n.) A mass of mucous and saliva that is forcefully ejected from the mouth onto a person or object.

The noun loogie is commonly used in conjunction with the verb 'hock.' See example below:

Lucy: "Ethel! Did you just hock a loogie in my coffee?"

Ethel: "Why, yes, Lucy, don't I always?"

Lucy: "Oh yeah I forgot! My FAVORITE!"

Ethel: "You empty the pot and I'll give you some snot, deal??"

Lucy: "MMMMMMmmmmmm!!! Thanks, Ethel! Jeepers you're the greatest! Gosh I've been hocking loogies in Ricky's coffee for eleven years (sigh). You know how those Cubans are about their boogers..."

"Yes... that fat fucker Fred is the same way. Hmph... MEN!!!

by Rob Porter February 23, 2009

chat sex

(n.) Same as phone sex, except that one must keep both hands on the keyboard. This indicates that one must use one's feet to masturbate, or learn to type with their toes. This leaves both hands free to grope yourself and someone else simultaneously. If fortune prevails, you could use the other hand to perform a rusty trombone or rusty trumpet on your favorite live sex partner while having chat sex with a third party.

STEVE42: Are you there, Bruce?
BRUCE69: Yes.
STEVE42: Let's have chat sex, OK?
BRUCE69: All right, man!
STEVE42: Let me find my big giant dildo, OK?
BRUCE69: OK. I'll just give your grandmother a rusty trumpet to pass the time, OK?
STEVE42: Sounds good.
BRUCE69: All right, my man! We're gonna get naked and nasty tonight!

by Rob Porter January 05, 2009

lemonade launcher

(n.) Slang term used by children, parents and pediatricians, that refers to the urethra of the male penis or the female vagina.

The term 'lemonade launcher' is a preferred euphemism to use when conversing with children about personal hygiene, unlike other nouns considered to be vulgar, like pisshole, pussy juice, dick, cock, cunt, twat, etc. Most parents would prefer that their children not use such 'nasty nouns.'

Natalie, you must remember to wash and clean your lemonade launcher before you get out of the bathtub.

by Rob Porter March 12, 2009

snot grabber

(n.) A nasty euphemism for a handkerchief or a tissue.

Jim: Hey, Jeff, hand me another tissue, please.

Jeff: I just gave you 3 Kleenex... how many snot grabbers do you plan to use, asshole?

by Rob Porter January 04, 2009

cunt finder

1. (n.) A lothario; a man who sexually exploits women;

2. (n.) A pimp;

3. (n.) One who happens upon a woman who turns out to be a total bitch.

1. Benjamin is a habitual cunt finder.

2. If you don't mind paying to get laid, you need to consult a cunt finder.

3. After a few minutes with that slut, he realized that he was about to become a cunt finder.

by Rob Porter November 26, 2007