QuacksO's definitions

Curtisy desk

The customer-service counter staffed by Santa’s head elf during the period while Jack Frost had taken over --- and shamelessly commercialized --- the North Pole due to the screwed-up "Santa clause".

Scott Calvin: I tried going to the Curtisy desk to get my Santa status back, but the head elf was totally under Jack Frost's "corporate life" influence, and so he didn't know how to help me; I had to resort to more outrageous measures to regain my rightful "throne".

by QuacksO August 25, 2018

MonteVideo

A large city in Uruguay where VHS tapes are made.

Now dat da general public has largely switched to DVDs, I wonder if da folks in MonteVideo will start making shiny lacquer discs for recording movies onto, rather than magnetic cassettes?

by QuacksO September 10, 2019

reduced-fat milk

Refers to the various "levels" or "degrees" of "milk" (sexual intercourse) that are below the actual "full-fat" kind (hot 'n' heavy copulation with totally bare genitals). These include:

2% milk (where the girl manually/orally "releases the pressure" right beforehand, so that the eager stud will be "freshly emptied" and thus won't be able to cum again for at least a few minutes, and so the girl can safely let him insert his bare cock and thrust inside of her for a while without spurting),

1% milk (where the chick still allows the guy to enter her but insists on his using protection),

Fat-free milk (where the cutie just gives the guy a blowjob or handjob. "Fat-free" milk may often be what is administered by a sympathetic-hearted chick to a second guy --- often while she is simultaneously riding her boyfriend's cock --- as a "cheer-up/courtesy gesture" so that said male bystander won't feel so "left out"; the girl takes pity on the partner-less dude and uses her lips and/or hands to pleasure his cock and let him "vent his pent-up emotions", without actually "giving him any cream" allowing him access between her legs), and

Powdered milk (where the gal lets the guy undress her and caress her all over with his hands and lips, and cuddles naked in bed with him, but does not "pleasure" him orally/manually or permit sexual intercourse of any kind).

Three even-more-austere examples of "less-than-whole cow-juice" are:

Curds and whey (where the gal lets the guy feel her up, but does not let him undress her),

Whey (where the gal allows lots of hugs and kisses, but does not let the guy touch her intimately, and

Plain water (where the gal lets the guy hold hands with her and maybe shares an occasional hug with him, but declines the more "lovey-dovey " gestures).

Horny guy: I love my new girlfriend --- nice personality, hot bod, great cook, and so on. I just wish she would let me truly "go all the way", but she only allows me reduced-fat milk --- makes me wear a rubber if I wanna "do it" between her legs!

by QuacksO June 29, 2023

crittercism

Refers to assorted eyebrows-raising, tongue-clucking, finger-wagging, and other disapproving gestures and verbal actions regarding your liking certain living beings other than humans.

Aside from people's negative emotional responses to your enthusiasm regarding non-homo-sapien friends, da term "crittercism" could also refer to sounds and/or actions dat come from said animals themselves if they are less-than-pleased wif something dat you are doing, such as making them take a bath, removing food-containers from which they were gluttonously over-indulging, and so on.

by QuacksO May 25, 2022

minotonous

How jaded-nerved people who crave constant excitement/entertainment might view living in a certain upstate municipality in North Dakota.

I crave peace and quiet, so I probably wouldn't find living in central Ward County to be particularly minotonous.

by QuacksO August 7, 2025

I'm/he's/she's a Christian, so you can trust me/him/her

All the more reason not to trust the person... if the fact that someone is a "born-aginner" even has to be mentioned, then there must be something less-than-honest/honorable that said supposedly-clean-living person has to hide --- "methinks he doth protest too much"!

I have seldom if ever had any more luck with the honesty/integrity/consistency/reliability/kindness of someone about whom I was solemnly assured that, "I'm/he's/she's a Christian, so you can trust me/him/her"... in fact, if anything, these stuck-up Bible-thunpers often seem to be even BIGGER a**h**es than their "non-believer" counterparts! They think that "God will forgive them" for anything they do, and so they make little true effort to keep their word or otherwise treat their fellow humans with even basic decency.

by QuacksO July 27, 2019

Jbano syndrome

A syndrome of a consumerism-driven "just buy a new one" lifestyle. A major causation factor of the National Debt, instances of this horridly-wasteful debacle can often be solved with as little as a few minutes of simple cleaning/repair-work, or a far-less-expensive used item can be procured. Long live thrift stores!

Jbano syndrome also has a kissing-cousin disorder known as Jbao ("Just buy another one") syndrome, which similarly involves needlessly purchasing one or more additional items, but for an even more pathetically-lame reason --- where the former unwise practice results from an item's being presently unusable due to actual damage, wear, soiling, or malfunction, Jbao syndrome stems from the original item's merely being presently inaccessible, such as from falling into a crack in the floor or behind a piece of furniture, being dropped into shallow water, getting lodged in a tall tree or on the roof of a house, etc. If the item were simply retrieved, it would be immediately usable again, without any cleaning or repair necessary. In some extreme cases, the item in question may not even be out of easy reach, but instead simply requires a slight upgrade or normal routine-maintenance, such as a circular-saw's needing a sharper blade, a lawn mower's needing a new spark plug, etc., not having a whole new appliance purchased.

by QuacksO May 24, 2018