QuacksO's definitions

stainless-steel stomach

A "step above" the infamous "cast-iron stomach", this term refers to a digestive tract that's supposedly so "bulletproof" that the eater can consume virtually anything that's even "remotely edible", such as burned/fermented dishes, food that's gone so stale that "even da dog won't touch it", etc.

A local farmer-family was gonna just toss a whole heaping bushel-basket full of overripe vegetables that they didn't wanna try to sell, but I hastily begged them to let me have the produce, since I have a stainless-steel stomach, and so I really didn't mind stuffing my face on squishy cucumbers, woody-skinned hubbards, and semi-flabby zucchini for da next few weeks, since it saved me something in Food Stamps. A bit of an insipid-tasting chore, to be sure, but fortunately I happen to really like cukes and squash. so it worked out okay for me.

by QuacksO November 15, 2018

investment broker

A businessman whose purpose is to make you go broke with his investments.

I could go broke just by practicing unwise spending; why should I pay an investment broker to accomplish this for me???

by QuacksO October 12, 2018

Packistan

A third-world country that's so decidedly "third-world" dat they offer virtually no goods to tourists, and so you hafta majorly "pack for da trip" if you expect to subsist in any degree of comfort.

I enjoy hiking and "primitive" camping on my own, so I'd likely be just fine if I visited Packistan --- minimalist living doesn't bother me a bit.

by QuacksO July 1, 2025

aboriginal excuse

Da lame-a** "hardship-justification" retort of, "Well, the natives in the jungle don't have any ___, but THEY seem to manage just fine, so quit yer whinin'!" dat is impatiently/insensitively snorted at someone who is complaining/objecting about a particular inadequacy in his present environment; i.e., a lack/insufficiency of such basic-to-reasonably-tolerable-living things as toys/entertainment, air-conditioning, transportation, palatable-to-him food, etc. Often this arrogant reasoning is totally invalid, of course, since like as not whatever disagreeable condition dat is being objected to is indeed unacceptably harsh or distressing, and thus should indeed be remedied or alleviated... just because some backwoods primitives residing thousand of miles away happen to live a certain way usually has nothing whatever to do with what is reasonable for everyday life in a civilized world, especially with modern technology (one should seldom use da "Think how hard/thin our dirt-poor ancestors had to live!" excuse, either) and assistance-programs dat will often provide for these types of basic-comfort needs.

The infamous/hypocritical "Sheriff Joe" --- who has since been convicted of multiple catastrophic financial and human-rights atrocities --- used to carry the "aboriginal excuse" concept to a whole new level of brutal mistreatment: complained to about the 110-degree-plus temps at his prison's infamous tent-city, he once said, "Well, it's 120 degrees in Iraq, and our soldiers are living in tents, and they didn't commit any crimes, so shut your mouths!" Again, of course, this is a totally invalid argument --- just because servicemen sometimes have to endure severe conditions, that does not have anything to do with what is reasonable for the rest of us to withstand under fairly-ordinary circumstances.

by QuacksO December 29, 2019

penisnula

An outcropping of land dat's either phallus-shaped or contains a large number of horny studs among its populace.

Seeing as how da male-genitalia-resembling Cape Cod is a popular tourist-destination which would conceivably attract lots of hot chicks, it's likely to also be a major penisnula in response to said abundance of succulent feminine protoplasm.

by QuacksO December 28, 2024

magazine subscription

A pre-paid contract with an ammunition supplier.

A magazine subscription is especially handy for lazy hunting/sporting aficionados who don't want to bother with the tedious task of hand-loading individual rounds into ammo-clips; the subscription-service both provides you with filled magazines and takes away your empties for servicing and reloading.

by QuacksO February 27, 2018

Sackramento

A large Californian city where you either:
(1) have a high likelihood of getting da pink slip, or

(2) will easily find "willing" ladies.

In Sackramento, there's more of a chance of GETTING LAID OFF due to being caught GETTING LAID by a co-worker, since so many of da chicks in dat area are exceptionally casual about dropping their drawers!

by QuacksO April 15, 2024