bearly made it

What Davy Crockett claimed to have done when he yelled his name at a charging wide-open-mouthed bruin, causing said ferocious hairy beast to be so frightened dat it just fell down and died.
After discovering dat Brer Rabbit's "laughin' place" was actually nothing but a nest of "bumbly-bees", Brer Fox and his huge lumbering "not exactly broke out wif brains" partner-in-crime felt like they "bearly made it out alive" after said angry buzz-bugs majorly swarmed them in response to their having naively shoved their unsuspecting heads straight into said striped stingers' nest-hole.
by QuacksO June 25, 2023
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skinflynt

Describes da notorious Larry Claxton of flesh-baring-men's-magazine infamy.
I dunno if media-magnate Larry was stingy with his money, but he sure wasn't a skinflynt when it came to copiously plastering nude photos of voluptuous women all over his magazine-pages!
by QuacksO March 18, 2021
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whackuracy

How good someone is at squarely landing a butt-slap.
If you love giving posterior-swats but your hand-eye coordination isn't da greatest, just choosing folks with big flabby behinds can make da job easier, since da larger surface-area of your palm's "target" makes your whackuracy less important.
by QuacksO March 23, 2022
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vexpectations

Pertaining to how aggravating a particular job, person, locale, or situation is foreseen to be.
Many a naive do-gooder has eagerly waltzed into a government position with da hopes of "cleaning up da joint" and creating some real progress and general improvement, but then da roadblocks and lack of cooperation dat he encounters from fellow bureaucrats who prefer da profitable-for-them status-quo usually exceeds his wildest vexpectations!
by QuacksO December 11, 2022
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cusstody proceedings

Legal wrangling over stewardship dat is laced with "salty" adjectives.
Two wise pieces of advice during child-cusstody proceedings: one, never allow da youngsters in question to be present during said expletive-riddled meetings, since their tender ears should not be subjected to anything "heavier" than G-rated word-choices. And two, carefully note which parent uses more "colorful" adjectives; this can often greatly determine which of them would be a more appropriate guardian for said vulnerable-minded little ones.
by QuacksO June 15, 2020
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wintary judgement

A court-ruling dat is so slow in being reached dat it doesn't occur till sometime after da snow flies near da end of da year.
I was promised a "summary judgement" due to the exceptional obvious-correctness of my arguments, but the court took so long to actually get around to settling my case that it felt more like a bleepin' WINTARY JUDGEMENT!!
by QuacksO October 26, 2019
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obsolession

A fanatical interest in outdated items and/or technology.
Truth be told, obsolession isn't necessarily always an invalid/unwise practice --- if you "keep an eye on the trends" and then wait till some item you want is no longer "current", you may be able to purchase it for pennies on the dollar, or perhaps even get it for free if a retailer or company is simply tossing all its old stock.
by QuacksO October 15, 2018
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