QuacksO's definitions

neighborhood

A community of horses. Mighty noisy at feeding time.

Mr. Rogers' friendly peaceable neighborhood is comprised of kind helpful interesting humans; I'd be more than happy to be his neighbor. Mr. Ed, on the other hand --- or rather, on the other HOOF --- has his own "neigh"-borhood which I'm sure is equally pleasant and cheerful, but it's entirely made up of "equine" citizens, and as mayor, "The Big E" is obliged to haul the ponderous creaky ol' hay-'n'-oats cart around to each and every house three times a day to deliver his four-legged friends' breakfast, lunch, and supper rations. A real **drag** (pun intended), but somebody's gotta do it.

by QuacksO July 30, 2017

Free Willy

A mockumentary that derisively details the sordid happenings of the infamous Clinton/Lewinsky scandal which involved "Free Willie" (as in, Clinton's disgracefully-uninhibited sexual behavior implied that he selfishly considered himself to be a "free man" {unattached bachelor}, since he was not honoring his wedding vows of monogamy to Hillary), and how he was being "free" (bold and brashly unrestrained, and not just with Monica, but with goodness knows HOW many other ladies --- think, the "Honk if you **haven't** slept with Clinton" bumper sticker) with his "willy" (defining explanation unnecessary :P). He was never known to charge anything for his "services", either, and so access to his "willy" was "free" for all of the ladies.

As many women as Free Willy has done da ol' bouncy-bouncy with, there could be a movie-history-making number of sequels (Free Willy 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, etc.).

by QuacksO July 29, 2017

shaken but not stirred

Not to be confused with how Pierce Brosnan's famous character prefers his martinis, this phrase refers to the status of a guy's totally limp lulu after an extended interval of either drinking or intercourse; it remains droopy/lifeless and therefore does not "stir" (i.e., become aroused) at all, no matter what the activity (i.e., being fondled or "shaken" to try to get it up) or surroundings (i.e., having one or more attractive nymphos nearby who are eager for sex).

Hot sex-hungry chick: My boyfriend and I "did it" for two hours straight till I finally wore him out, and then his ordinarily-perpetually-boned schlong remained shaken but not stirred no matter what I did. We hadda wait till late the next morning before he was able to get it up again.

by QuacksO July 29, 2017

go-to guy

An ultra-forgiving and soft-hearted dude --- often a clean-living fellow who is financially-solvent and caring/respectful to everyone, but who seldom is able to "hang on to" a lady for more than a month or two because he is somewhat naive/awkward and/or he simply lacks "hot hunk" appeal --- whom a selfish/irresponsible lady views as merely a "spare tire" --- she keeps "running back to him" over and over again each time her successive brief flings with other guys go sour... like many of the other gals who have briefly dated him, she actually gets along okay with this one particular dude most of the time --- he always treats her with kindness and respect, and he's "always there for her" and helps her out with stuff in her life. But then whenever she meets someone new, she gets all starry-eyed and flippantly brushes off the clueless guy in her eager reckless headlong dash for seemingly greener pastures, but then when the new dude gets fed up with her mindlessly-consumptive ways and/or shallow attitude and goes off in a huff again, she immediately comes bawling and blubbering back to her "original" guy in floods of penitent tears --- "How could I have ever even DREAMED of leaving you? How utterly STUPID of me... you are indeed the best thing that ever happened to me!" (Yeah, sure --- just until she meets somebody else, that is, and then here we go all over again!)

Clueless dude with his heart on his sleeve: I hate being a go-to guy for a lot of the gals I meet... I wanna be one of the "regular tires" on their car, not just the spare donut to rattle around in their trunk and then briefly slap on whenever one of their "regular tires" blows out, and then get casually tossed back into the trunk as soon as another "regular tire" comes along!

by QuacksO August 4, 2017

weedless prop

A.k.a. "weed-free prop". Refers to any fake or "just for show" object (i.e., "Hugs not drugs" t-shirt, "Just say no" bumper sticker, etc.) that one prominently displays in an attempt to fool others into believing that he or she "shuns the Mary Jane" ("weed"), when in reality the person enjoys a good joint or bowl just as much as the rest of 'em do, and so the flashy personal-virtue-proclaiming object is merely a "prop", and is therefore just about as legitimate (NOT!) as the identically-named and moderately-pricey boating-accessory's often-grossly-exaggerated claim to consistently shrug off tangles with aquatic vegetation --- generally speaking, those much-hyped devices still get all gloobered up with milfoil and lily-tendrils just about as much/often as the standard "screws" do, and so the item's purchaser gets "screwed", as well!

Ever since pot use has become more widespread --- and even legal --- in many areas, the sales of weedless prop items has skyrocketed... what a sham!

by QuacksO August 12, 2017

contradicktion/contradicktory

Where a dude claims to just like how a gal looks overall and/or just want a platonic friendship, but his massive bulging hard-on sends a totally different message.

Well-hung dude: I used to unintentionally scare off the ladies with my major contradicktion/contradicktory crotch-appearance until I learned to "relieve the pressure" just shortly before I went to meet the gal, so that Lulu would be too limp and exhausted to "jump to attention" at the first sight of the "luscious looker".

by QuacksO April 18, 2018

Urine big trouble

Ur unenviable status if u pee anywhere other than in da bowl. And it works like baseball, as well --- da first time u "miss", **urine** big trouble. Da second time you errantly tinkle, **uron** probation, and da third time, "urout", which iz da opposite of "urine".

It's often grounds for ur not being invited back to someone's home if u clumsily mis-direct da "golden shower" elsewhere from its intended "target" while using the neighbor's WC --- usually urine big trouble for your errant tinkling, unless of course u can prove extenuating circumstances (being startled by a sudden/loud noise while peeing, having someone turn off da bathroom light, etc.) while u were taking said whiz and thus acceptably/legitimately shift da "aim blame" somewhere else, in which case, "uroff" da hook on dat occasion.

by QuacksO August 14, 2017