Platezz's definitions

Night Smear

The act of dragging your ass crack down a person's nose while they sleep. This is best after you get done working out that way you are soggy af. When they wake up they will wonder why everything smells like shit and why their nose is so sticky.

victim: Why the fuck does everything in my damn house smell like shit!
me: Someone at the party gave you a Night Smear last night after you passed out.
victim: I'm going to kill those motherfuckers!

by Platezz January 24, 2018

Abort-miss-tion

When you find you got the bitch pregnant, so you light firecrackers off in her vagina to discard of any traces of life. This will most certainly make you lose your girlfriend unless she's into that. She will also probably be sent to an intensive care unit.

I'm going to be locked up in prison for like 25 years after performing an Abort-miss-tion on my gal.

by Platezz January 25, 2018

Lunar landing

A sexual action that involves a man trust falling onto the back side of a women. As the man is landing he needs to calculate for his penis to enter the anal cavity perfectly. Miscalculation lead to a broken dick. *Not a game for the family to play*

“Bro, I finally pulled off a lunar landing on my girlfriend last night. It only took four painful attempts before I stabbed the moon.”

by Platezz January 25, 2018

Jupiter gas

When an extremely fat person's natural scent is enough to disintegrate any fly within 10 miles. No exaggeration..

Natural habitats these smells can be discovered in:
- found lurking through walmart under a fat scooter drivers ass
-found near bleachers under a 2 ton of fun mans ass that is taking up 3 seats at a sporting event.

Cause of death: was trapped in public bathroom filled with Jupiter gas.

by Platezz January 25, 2018

bona lisa

When a really bland looking chick gives you a boner for a some odd reason. At this point in your life you will really stop and think about how low your standards have become..

Me: Dude I don’t know what it is about our 80 year old librarian woman, but damn she keeps giving me a bona lisa.

Friend: I feel like you need to see a therapist my dude

by Platezz January 25, 2018

adaptive chugging

A term used when people are chugging a liquid (mainly alcohol ) off of random objects into their mouths. It’s very popular on the Do It For State page. This includes drinks being poured down dead animal carcass, through engine blocks, in between titties, down the ass of a cow, down a gutter, out of trash can.. etc

“Hey johnny boy, lets go do some adaptive chugging to the point where I go blind!”

by Platezz January 25, 2018

Rivet the box

This occurs when a man has to take a couple slow inserts into a girl’s vagina before he can lay the wood at a faster pace. A common practice used to ease your way into a Virgin.

“Jacey was a lil tight the first time we had sex so I had to rivet the box before I could pick up my pleasure pace.”

by Platezz January 25, 2018