20 definitions by Max Biggins
Another clumsy and childish portmanteau word invented by feminists who are too lazy to actually change society for the better in any meaningful way.
Feminist: Excuse me, but I don't like people manterrupting me.
Human: I 'm sorry, but I thought you were just doing an impression of an electrocuted cat.
Human: I 'm sorry, but I thought you were just doing an impression of an electrocuted cat.
by Max Biggins September 28, 2016
Dave; So what is it?
Dr Parenthesis: I think it's likely to be a hybrid creature - a chimaera - part hipster, part emo - a scenester in all but name.. a hipster emo
Dave: How about hipstemo?
Dr Parenthesis: No, too close to epistemology.
Dr Parenthesis: I think it's likely to be a hybrid creature - a chimaera - part hipster, part emo - a scenester in all but name.. a hipster emo
Dave: How about hipstemo?
Dr Parenthesis: No, too close to epistemology.
by Max Biggins September 28, 2016
Not quite midgets, not just short, but arrestingly diminutive (5' -5'5''). alternatively funny/ pathetic when confronted with a tall girl (above 5'8'') in a bar or club.
Frequenters of chain pubs and bars in provinical and coastal city centres.
Frequenters of chain pubs and bars in provinical and coastal city centres.
Sindy: Hey, Babs, look at that little bloke with the popped collar chatting up your sister.
Barbie : he's having trouble looking her in the eye. wait, they're coming over.
Sindy: Don't stand up or you'll make him feel like a right Short Arse.
Barbie : he's having trouble looking her in the eye. wait, they're coming over.
Sindy: Don't stand up or you'll make him feel like a right Short Arse.
by Max Biggins November 18, 2012
A town on the south coast of England that is slowly succumbing to a tide of destitution and urban decay, which is unsual for a town of Bognor's size and location.
Visitors can try drinking in the Wetherspoons before being stabbed, get a celtic band or tribal at the various tattoo parlours, sample processed ham from the discount stores and even try their luck at a bingo hall and job centre.
You can test your local knowledge at a pub quiz on the sea front, where teams of pub employees join in to answer questions about their own pub, and you can witness first hand the summer spectacular of northerners beating up the red coats at Butlins then fighting with eastern europeans over the stuffed macaque they won in the Doner meat-eating contest.
There are retail parks featuring Matalan, Burger King and skulking coal-eyed chavs who only speak in vowels, and some lovely cashpoints at which to have your card cloned, or ripped from your hands by the feral children of a chain-smoking, morbidly obese Jabba with a wispy moustache.
You may also find yourself disorientated by a sudden burst of slavic languages from everyone around you, but this is a reflection of Bognor's multicultural diversity of poor white English and poor white Polish.
Bognor became famous for an appearance in the last episode of Wish You Were Here, in which Judith Chalmers was stalked by a family of Wendigo-people then dismembered and devoured. It was only ever aired on UKTV Gold.
Visitors can try drinking in the Wetherspoons before being stabbed, get a celtic band or tribal at the various tattoo parlours, sample processed ham from the discount stores and even try their luck at a bingo hall and job centre.
You can test your local knowledge at a pub quiz on the sea front, where teams of pub employees join in to answer questions about their own pub, and you can witness first hand the summer spectacular of northerners beating up the red coats at Butlins then fighting with eastern europeans over the stuffed macaque they won in the Doner meat-eating contest.
There are retail parks featuring Matalan, Burger King and skulking coal-eyed chavs who only speak in vowels, and some lovely cashpoints at which to have your card cloned, or ripped from your hands by the feral children of a chain-smoking, morbidly obese Jabba with a wispy moustache.
You may also find yourself disorientated by a sudden burst of slavic languages from everyone around you, but this is a reflection of Bognor's multicultural diversity of poor white English and poor white Polish.
Bognor became famous for an appearance in the last episode of Wish You Were Here, in which Judith Chalmers was stalked by a family of Wendigo-people then dismembered and devoured. It was only ever aired on UKTV Gold.
Geoffrey Palmer: I once won an episode of Catchphrase, and Roy Walker gave me the choice of Bognor Regis or Chernobyl, which was still glowing at the time.
Christopher Timothy: I assume you went with Bognor?
Geoffrey Palmer: Only after I was absolutely convinced Chernobyl was utterly irradiated and swimming with mutants. As it turned out, Bognor wasn't quite as irradiated, but had a higher mutant count. Swings and roundabouts.
Christopher Timothy: I assume you went with Bognor?
Geoffrey Palmer: Only after I was absolutely convinced Chernobyl was utterly irradiated and swimming with mutants. As it turned out, Bognor wasn't quite as irradiated, but had a higher mutant count. Swings and roundabouts.
by Max Biggins November 1, 2012
'Geoffrey, I hear the Royal Society held a capital soiree, with the most exquisite selection of cunt. Not too pungent, or sloppy.'
'Indeed, Cavendish. The blonde niece of Barnabus was a particularly delectable morsel; tidy, clipped and with a dash of salty haddock. Father Roland almost wept.'
'Indeed, Cavendish. The blonde niece of Barnabus was a particularly delectable morsel; tidy, clipped and with a dash of salty haddock. Father Roland almost wept.'
by Max Biggins August 3, 2012
Peter Drury: Now here's Vladimir Putin, the God-Emperor himself. He shoots... and he scores! How did he score from outside the stadium?
Gary Neville: There's never been a better player, even though he's never played football and is usually far too busy leading our civilisation towards an uncertain fate.
Gary Neville: There's never been a better player, even though he's never played football and is usually far too busy leading our civilisation towards an uncertain fate.
by Max Biggins October 9, 2020
a large man (effectively), who adopts the stylings of an emo or nerd (i.e. black rimmed glasses, stripy sweater, sensitive hair).
wan teenage girls with short red hair and shawls will see his gimlet eyes, strong shoulders and thick arms, but sense a betrayal of the small, scared child inside. not only has this man got a physique to protect her from the world, but also the heart of a poet.
wan teenage girls with short red hair and shawls will see his gimlet eyes, strong shoulders and thick arms, but sense a betrayal of the small, scared child inside. not only has this man got a physique to protect her from the world, but also the heart of a poet.
by Max Biggins April 19, 2006