The Right

Exercise your rights or you are just another norm
We all have the right to:

1. Make our own choices.
2. Not be controlled by those who believe they are superior to us because they earn the money and pay the bills.
3. Be in control of our destinies (although we must listen to the universe when she calls).
4. Privacy, even from those we believe love us (When someone loves you they respect your privacy).
5. To dream, to hope for a better future for ourselves and for those that we love.
6. Forgive and be forgiven (true love does not require forgiveness).
7. Be understood and to understand ourselves (to understand ourselves we must first be honest with ourselves - Refer: Choice
8. To be happy (Refer: point 2)
9. To be able to tell the one you love that you love her while you are making love to her without fearing that she will never speak to you again.
10. To not be stoned everytime she is willing to love you.
11. To be able to hold her in your arms after sharing so much.
12. Give of ourselves freely; to not be told to follow the rules of Bogans.
13. Be respected; to be helped to find ourselves again when we are lost. (those who love you, will sacrifice everything to help you. Those who only say they love you, do not care enough to show you the respect that you deserve.
14. Follow our hearts and not our minds.
15. Take a risk even when there never was one.
16. Not be blackmailed by those we have become dependant on. - example: When you come home after an amazing day and they are sitting on the edge of the bed with their suitcases packed telling you they are going to leave - that is blackmail. It also suggests that they are willing to risk losing you.
That they do not respect your intelligence and are more than willing to exploit your gullibility.
Just in case you are wondering - if they were going to leave, they would have already left.
The dilemma for you in this situation is that you do not have time to make a choice even if you tell the one who really loves you, that you did have to make a choice.
17. Love and be loved.
by Luke warm October 16, 2008
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The Stares

When one becomes vacant during an activity and appears to be staring off into space

The stares occur due to a lack of interest in the local environment, activity or people due to too much self interest and the attention span of a stoned butterfly that flunked out of butterfly primary school in the 3rd grade for licking bus windows instead of innuendo laden flower parts.
NotaBogan: ...It means a lot to me; I cant even begin to tell you how much of a difference this could make ...are you even listening?

ABogan4sure: Umm, what?, sorry Bogan I must have had the stares

NotaBogan: Well thank you for making me feel less than random yet again

ABogan4sure: Oh harden the fuck up and stop being a bogan

NotaBogan: I am so sorry that you have done something to hurt me again and blamed me for it. How could I be so thoughtless as to have feelings.

ABogan4sure: I dont have the energy for this any more

NotaBogan: You are truly the most Awesome friend

The example above may appear a tad random and ‘NotaBogan’ may also appear to be over-reacting somewhat; however, repeated episodes of the stares do tend to add up and become rather annoying (refer: Tracey Smiff)

Wednesday 05/11/2008
by Luke Warm December 22, 2008
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Random Bogan

Random:
1. Someone of little significance
2. Everyone that you don't know and some that you do

Bogan:
1. Trailer trash
2. Your mother
3. see above
4. Look around, they are everywhere. Can often be found at Safeway or exploring Woolly bush while wearing a flannelette shirt, black acca-dacca t-shirt or wife basher singlet as well as tight black jeans and desert boots (DB's).
There are three main keys to correctly identifying a Bogan:

1. The obligatory packet of wini-blues rolled up in the sleeve to draw attention to the guns that they have developed from years of being a wanker;

2. The stubby or can of Victoria Bitter (VB); which also proves how little taste and class Bogans possess; and

3. The 'Mullet' the haircut with its own motto:
'Business at the front, party at the back'
in some circles also referred to as:
'Party at the back, business at the front'
Either way it is still a shit haircut

Random Bogan:
Look in the mirror; tell me what you see
I wish these Random Bogans would just get out of my way

There are so many Random Bogans here; it is not hot. I would go so far as to say that it is so Luke warm here right now

So little air, so many Random Bogans

Your mother is a Random Bogan.
That makes your father a 'Random Bogan Mother Fucker'.
Guess that must really suck for you; good thing that as you are also a Random Bogan, no-one really gives a fuck

Harden the fuck up; stop being a Random Bogan
by Luke Warm August 03, 2008
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Bogan

Australian or New Zealander who possesses no class at all

Refer: white trash, red-neck, trailer trash, alcoholic, breeder, simpleton, Victorian, Geelong, Prahran, Shepparton
The traditional Bogan:

Identification key for the male of the species:
Black desert boots, tight black jeans, blue singlet or black t-shirt (AC-DC etc), blue chequered flannelette (flanny) long sleeved shirt.
Mullet haircut (Short at the front, long at the back – refer: Billy Ray Cyrus The haircut with its own motto: 'Business at the front, party at the back' in some circles also referred to as: 'Party at the back, business at the front' Either way it is still a shit haircut.
Smokes ‘winfield blues’, these are generally located rolled up in the sleeve of the ‘flanny’
Drinks Victoria Bitter (VB)
Drives a generally loud V8 Holden or Ford with a stupid sticker on the back taking the piss out of the make of car that they do not drive; or simply stating the make/model of car that they do drive, just in case they forget.

Identification key for the female of the species:
Loud whore with way too many snotty brats, horrible shrill voice, shocking accent, really stupid (no analogy available), shops at Safeway, also possesses all of the traits of the male of the species.

Social activities include: going down the pub, drinking, arguing, violence, breeding, prejudice of all varieties, watching the footy, watching Big Brother, watching Greys anatomy, watching today tonight and A current affair to see what their relatives are up to, watching the cricket, ten-pin bowling, doing burnouts and bog laps (bogan laps = driving around town just because), filling the front yard up with cars thereby further devaluing the neighbourhood, bbq’s and referring to everyone else as bogans (no I am not a bogan; don’t be a smart-arse lol)

The contemporary Bogan:

White trash with a severe American influence on their language, social skills and lack of fashion sense.

Friday 26/12/2008
by Luke Warm January 05, 2009
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Tool

1. Something that is used to assist with the modification of an object or situation.

2. Something that is used to create or destroy.

3. Slang synonym for the males sexual reproduction whatsit.

4. Someone who does seemingly silly things; often used as a term of endearment, but not always!
I am a tool because I have been used to:
Improve someones ego;
Distract them from the mediocrity of their own existance;
Make someone else jealous;
To improve someones elses relationship (how bizarre);
To get them a valentines day present (this year)

For love.
For happiness.
For laughter.

To do everything for them, and in return:
To accept all of the guilt.
To hold all of the pain.
To take all of the blame.
(It was never a game).

A good tradesman respects his tools!!


A Hammer is a tool both used to create and to destroy.

My penis is a somewhat rusty tool I must admit (only from lack of use!!).

I hit my penis with a hammer while making pancakes (as you do)
That sure modified the fuck out of both the objects involved and the situation:
I created a lot of pain
I destroyed the pancake batter (all over the floor), and my willy - must admit i chipped a bit off of the hammer handle too!!

I hit my tool with a tool; I am such a tool

I do not regret being a tool - my penis however has a somewhat different (slanted) view on the subject

Sunday 02/11/2008
by Luke Warm December 22, 2008
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What the fuck?

An expression used to convey various reactions to events. ‘What the fuck?’ may be used in an attempt to explain any one or combination of the reactions/emotions listed below and then some.

A: Confusion
B: Incredulous confusion
C: Surprise
D: Disappointment
E: Hurt
F: Anger
G: Ironically
What the fuck?’ Is rarely used as a positive statement; however it may be used ironically to convey such is life (refer ex G)


A: Confusion
Why would someone use someone else who is in love with them?

B: Incredulous confusion
How could you use me to make him jealous?, to get yourself a valentines day present?, to add some excitement to your life?, to distract you?, to improve your ego?, to do most of your study?, to improve your sex life?

C: Surprise
It is a surprise to me that people can even think that way, can lie so much even to themselves, can take pleasure from causing others pain, can actually be proud of themselves for being a total arsehole

D: Disappointment
It disappoints me that even now you cannot tell the truth; that you can forget so much so easily; that it was all a lie, all just a game to you

E: Hurt
Guess what? – when you think you can feel no more pain, there is always more. To be lied to and used by someone that you have given yourself to is more hurt than anyone should have to feel

F: Anger
I am angry at myself for being a tool; I sometimes feel anger towards Tracey for being a bogan

G: Ironically
Everything I do even now, benefits you in your little game and hurts me even more. Every chance I give you just allows you to tell more lies; I am sick of Tracey time. I will talk to him, the truth will by known one way or the other. This is between us three; if he will not speak to me, I will speak to others. I have given more than enough opportunities for the truth to be told. This cannot continue. You will always be a Victorian

Tuesday 11/11/2008
by Luke Warm December 23, 2008
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Jade

Jade is a generally green semi precious gemstone and as well as being a colour (Hex: 558A84 RGB: 85,138,132.) It is also the best name for a female (of any species) The name Jade is best suited to someone with dark hair and tends to conjure up an oriental feel (mmm... sounds hot)
The love of my life,
My reason for existence;
All my dreams come true,
I offer no resistance.

Bad poetry will I write,
far past the end of time;
my drink of choice is vodka,
with soda, lemon and lime.

Life is hard, I must admit my despair
I am in love, all should be so sweet
What is so right cannot be wrong
I love you

Note: it is the authors opinion that poetry does not have to rhyme. This point is especially valid when the poetry in question is of such a poor standard as is the case above.

However; this is of no importance as
I love Jade and I will continue to regardless of everything

Jade is Sweetness
Tracey is a Bogan
I am and have always been The lowest priority
by Luke Warm December 23, 2008
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