Loxi's definitions
The biggest reason for stress in most marriages and the number one cause of divorce in the United States.
by Loxi July 22, 2009
Get the money mug.A deliberate insult said to a person's face by a Southerner who is thought to be giving high praise, but is in fact thoroughly insulting the person. The slam is said in a heavy Southern drawl so as to fool the person into thinking you are stupid.
Example 1:
Upon seeing a woman approach wearing a hideous dress:
Southern Slammer: "Where eva did you get that dress? I simply must know. It takes my breath away!
Loosely translated: "That is the fugliest dress I have ever seen. I want to know where you got it so I can avoid that store like the plague!"
Upon seeing a woman approach wearing a hideous dress:
Southern Slammer: "Where eva did you get that dress? I simply must know. It takes my breath away!
Loosely translated: "That is the fugliest dress I have ever seen. I want to know where you got it so I can avoid that store like the plague!"
by Loxi July 19, 2009
Get the southern slam mug.Refers to a male with unfulfilled dreams of sports stardom who then pressures his children into playing sports in the hope they achieve the stardom he failed to achieve.
The sports jockey is the male equivalent of the stage mom.
The sports jockey is the male equivalent of the stage mom.
Wife 1: (Sighing) My husband enrolled (insert child's name here) in softball, gymnastics, tennis, and track this year at school.
Wife 2: You poor thing. You married a sports jockey too?
Wife 2: You poor thing. You married a sports jockey too?
by Loxi July 17, 2009
Get the sports jockey mug.Short for "lawn martyr". The lawtyr insists on doing the yard maintenance himself (mowing, landscaping, etc.) all the while complaining to everyone within earshot about having to do it -- and acting rather put upon.
The lawtyr is the natural foe of the housewife.
The lawtyr is the natural foe of the housewife.
Neighbor: What's the hubby up to today?
Wife: Ah, nothing much. He's just lawtyring around the house today.
Wife: Ah, nothing much. He's just lawtyring around the house today.
by Loxi July 16, 2009
Get the Lawtyr mug.A matrimonial state as defined by:
1) Females: "Marriage is the opportunity for two souls to be legally bound together so that they can share their innermost thoughts and feelings while creating the most perfect life together."
2) Males: "Wow, a chick to take care of me like my mother used to - but with the added bonus of sex!"
1) Females: "Marriage is the opportunity for two souls to be legally bound together so that they can share their innermost thoughts and feelings while creating the most perfect life together."
2) Males: "Wow, a chick to take care of me like my mother used to - but with the added bonus of sex!"
See marriage definition above.
by Loxi July 19, 2009
Get the marriage mug.An emotionally under-developed, materialistic, thinks-he-knows-it-all child between the ages of 12-20 who pushes his parents' sanity to the limit.
by Loxi July 20, 2009
Get the teenager mug.Refers to a member of the Catholic faith who breaks one or more of the ten commandments in record time (either before or after leaving the Catholic Church).
Examples include:
1. Madonna, entertainer
2. Alberto Cutie, aka "Father Oprah", former priest
3. Kenneth Bianchi, aka "The Hillside Strangler", convicted murderer
Examples include:
1. Madonna, entertainer
2. Alberto Cutie, aka "Father Oprah", former priest
3. Kenneth Bianchi, aka "The Hillside Strangler", convicted murderer
Guy 1: Man, did you see on television that Father Oprah scored him a babe?
Guy 2: Yeah! You got to admire him for catapulpitting himself toward such a hot piece of ass!
Guy 2: Yeah! You got to admire him for catapulpitting himself toward such a hot piece of ass!
by Loxi July 18, 2009
Get the catapulpit mug.