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Lawtyr

Short for "lawn martyr". The lawtyr insists on doing the yard maintenance himself (mowing, landscaping, etc.) all the while complaining to everyone within earshot about having to do it -- and acting rather put upon.

The lawtyr is the natural foe of the housewife.
Neighbor: What's the hubby up to today?

Wife: Ah, nothing much. He's just lawtyring around the house today.
by Loxi July 16, 2009
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Police Scanner Perv

A citizen who listens intently to a police scanner all day and night so that he will know of all of the fires, murders, robberies, assaults, etc. that occur in his town. The PSP then gleefully informs his friends the next day of the gory details.

The PSP differs from the local policeman, fireman, or EMT with a scanner in that he has a pervy interest in listening to the scanner, not a professional interest.
Dispatcher on Scanner: We have a 10-59 on 25th and Maple; a house is burning, a trauma team and a fire control team are en route.

Police Scanner Perv: Ssh, honey. I am trying to hear the scanner. I think your mother's house may be on fire!
by Loxi July 18, 2009
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starving kids in Africa

Phrase used by Catholic priests or nuns to guilt parochial students into eating vegetables that are good for them or donating money to yet another Catholic charity.
Example 1:

Sr. Mary: Eat your brussels sprouts, Susie.

Susie: But, I don't like them, sister. They're yucky!

Sr. Mary: I can't believe you are wasting food. Why, there are starving kids in Africa who would give anything to have those brussel sprouts. So, you eat them, you hear? They're part of God's bountiful harvest.

Susie: (Looking guilty) Yes, sister.

Example 2:

Sr. Mary: (To class) As part of our Lenten service project, I am asking that each of you donate your lunch money today to the Feed the Children organization. In return, you will receive one cracker and a bowl of watered-down chicken broth for lunch - just like the starving kids in Africa eat every day.

Susie: (Looking longingly at her lunch money) Yes, sister.
by Loxi July 18, 2009
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catholicked

Definition 1: A student who received corporal punishment at parochial school via a monster-sized paddle that was kept in the principals office.

Definition 2: Oral technique that parochial school cheerleaders used on every boy they came in contact with.
I know of many people who were Catholicked during my 12 years in parochial school.
by Loxi July 19, 2009
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evasive maneuver

Action taken by a person who spys another person approaching whom he would like to avoid.

Evasive maneuvers include:

1. Ducking down an aisle or into a cubicle to avoid the person.

2. Turning around mid-stride and walking away from the person before he spys you.

3. Making up an elaborate (yet plausible) excuse to get away from the person, i. e. "I really want to chat, but I am late picking up my kids from daycare. It was good seeing you!"

4. Pretending to be engaged in some important act (i.e. a telephone call) so the person is forced to leave your presence.
Upon seeing the office gossip approach, the clerk begins the evasive maneuver of grabbing a stack of folders and heading toward the file room.
by Loxi July 17, 2009
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Yankton

A small town in southeast South Dakota whose claim to fame includes the following:

1. Home to Tom Brokaw, former anchor of the NBC Nightly News.

2. Football player Lyle Alzado attended Yankton College there.

3. Convicted murder of Wild Bill Hickok, Jack McCall, is buried there.
Employee: You live in Yankton?

Co-worker: (Smiling) Yep!
by Loxi July 17, 2009
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salary

Money paid to an employee for regular work performed that is supposed to reflect the true value of the employee to the company, but more often resembles a bad joke.
My salary is laughable.
by Loxi July 21, 2009
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