LiberaceHudson's definitions

lickel shpickel

The name given to oral sex between 2 elderly Jewish spinsters.

"Edith, how would you like to chow down on my lickel shpickel?"
"No thanks Sarah as I've just taken my teeth out for the night."

by LiberaceHudson October 6, 2017

Kazoo

A kazoo is a small, simple musical instrument consisting of a hollow pipe with a hole in it, over which is a thin covering that vibrates and adds a buzzing sound when the player sings or hums into the pipe.

Kenny had to admit that he was musically talentless. Even the Autoharp was beyond his limited capabilities. He knew then he had to persevere with the kazoo because it was his last chance to impress the ladies and perhaps lose his virginity before his 52nd birthday.

by LiberaceHudson September 24, 2017

Dicktionary

This is the term given to any dictionary that is usually only read by assholes. Very popular in Congress.

Look, there's that Congressman reading the dicktionary again. He's always got his nose in that.

by LiberaceHudson October 10, 2017

Queef

An explosive sound emanating from the female front bottom similar to flatus but without the rancid smell.

Barry grew up in a very open household, his parents regularly walking about naked in front of him. One day he was talking with his friend Emily on the telephone when his mother walked past him without a stitch on. Without warning, she let out a very aggressive sounding queef which shook him to the core. It was not unlike the sound that is made when a rubber bath mat is pulled forcibly up from the inside of a bathtub. Barry suddenly felt quite nauseous and dry-heaved. Emily asked what was wrong. Barry couldn't say. Barry's mother was by now in the next room banging Barry's dad who was none the wiser.

by LiberaceHudson September 22, 2017

polliwogs

A polliwog is a tadpole.

"Hey, look at those polliwogs over there."
"Oi! I'm offended by the term you used there. Say 'tadpole' or I will shop you to the thought police.
"Sorry Mr. Lammy, our mistake."

by LiberaceHudson September 25, 2017

Mormon pancake

A Mormon pancake is the term given to any flat food served up that contains male ejaculate added in there as a joke.

Myra is 99 years of age and a virgin. Imagine her surprise then to discover that her nephew Kevin has just served her up a good old-fashioned Mormon pancake. I bet she even asks for seconds.

by LiberaceHudson October 6, 2017

Code 8

Code 8 is the term given on a tannoy system to alert the store manager and assistant manager (if he's on duty) to the presence of a very hot woman in the store. Not to be confused with a Code 19 (otherwise known as Dragonwatch) which is an ugly woman. As you can imagine, Code 19's supersede Code 8's by a significant amount.

Debbie walked into the store. Her ass was magnificent and looked great in her denim cut-off shorts. her tits were heavenly and she moved like she'd just been on the receiving end of an almighty walloping. In fact, maybe the walloping to end all wallopings. She was sex on a stick and the employees knew it. Shireen the sweaty fat bird hated her. Harry quickly dialled up a Code 8 on the tannoy phone and in a matter of seconds Robert the store manager was pretending to adjust the shelves in the aisle Debbie was standing in. Ever the professional he asked if there was anything he could assist her with. Debbie said that she was fine but thanked him all the same. She made no mention of the soldier standing to attention in his pants.

by LiberaceHudson September 24, 2017