L.MARTIN's definitions
The biological certainty that your wife,heavy-duty girlfriend,significant other-will guiltlessly fuck someone wealthier and/or more famous than you...should the opportunity
present itself.Remember:She thinks she coulda' done better.
present itself.Remember:She thinks she coulda' done better.
WIFE:"Honey...is'nt that Derek Jeter over there at the table in the corner?"
HUSBAND:"Sure is!Go Yankees!"
WIFE:"Gotta go to the ladies room."
HUSBAND OF SECOND COUPLE IN DINING FOURSOME:"While you're in there...tuck your GROUPIE GENE back in.It's showing!"
WIFE OF SECOND COUPLE IN DINING FOURSOME:"I'll go check on her."
HUSBAND:"Sure is!Go Yankees!"
WIFE:"Gotta go to the ladies room."
HUSBAND OF SECOND COUPLE IN DINING FOURSOME:"While you're in there...tuck your GROUPIE GENE back in.It's showing!"
WIFE OF SECOND COUPLE IN DINING FOURSOME:"I'll go check on her."
by L.MARTIN October 14, 2005
Get the GROUPIE GENE mug.The fantasy of collectors everywhere-(mostly automotive)-that they'll stumble upon a mint condition vintage 'Benz or Ferrari
in a barn or airplane hangar somewhere between N.Y/L.A....owned by someone just happy to get rid of it.Uh-huh.
in a barn or airplane hangar somewhere between N.Y/L.A....owned by someone just happy to get rid of it.Uh-huh.
COLLECTOR:"My 300SL Roadster was a BARN FIND from an estate sale on a river town in Southern Indiana.Family was just happy to be rid of the thing at 90k.Imagine that!"
COLLECTOR 2:"Enough with your fish stories!Even in desperation
nobody let's that rig go for less than 300K.There's photos of you at Barrett Jackson last month anyway."
COLLECTOR 2:"Enough with your fish stories!Even in desperation
nobody let's that rig go for less than 300K.There's photos of you at Barrett Jackson last month anyway."
by L.MARTIN October 14, 2005
Get the BARN FIND mug.ONE PHONE CALL: If she/he can't decide to get together after one phone call...it was'nt meant to be.Either they're not into you or worse...they're indecisive.
TWO DATES:If he/she is'nt in the bed of your choosing after two dates-(They know if they want you)-end all contact.Either they're not into you,or worse...they're indecisive attention whores.
THREE FUCKS:Get past the first two? Got him/her in bed? Good.Make it enjoyable for all involved...but at about that third session...someone will want to be involved more deeply.Time to bounce.Who's on deck?
TWO DATES:If he/she is'nt in the bed of your choosing after two dates-(They know if they want you)-end all contact.Either they're not into you,or worse...they're indecisive attention whores.
THREE FUCKS:Get past the first two? Got him/her in bed? Good.Make it enjoyable for all involved...but at about that third session...someone will want to be involved more deeply.Time to bounce.Who's on deck?
DUDE 1:"Gina is hot...but whatever happened to Josie?"
DUDE 2:"She wanted commitment.I got a RULE OF 123 I tend to follow.Just was'nt in the cards."
DUDE 2:"She wanted commitment.I got a RULE OF 123 I tend to follow.Just was'nt in the cards."
by L.MARTIN October 3, 2005
Get the RULE OF 123 mug.IF YOU'RE A STRAIGHT MAN:
1)Out and about with one woman...RESPECT.
2)Out and about with two women...MUCH RESPECT.
(Quick note:This scenario was more likely to happen
in days gone by.(the 70's)Nowadays...to have two
women out for fun...then back to the pad for more
fun...is exceedingly rare.Unless they're "proffessionals".
Which by the way is not a bad thing in itself.
3)Out and about with three women...YOU'RE FEMME GAY.
Nothing wrong with that...but if you're not...one can
assume the worst case scenario...that you are deemed
SAFE and NON-THREATENING.
1)Out and about with one woman...RESPECT.
2)Out and about with two women...MUCH RESPECT.
(Quick note:This scenario was more likely to happen
in days gone by.(the 70's)Nowadays...to have two
women out for fun...then back to the pad for more
fun...is exceedingly rare.Unless they're "proffessionals".
Which by the way is not a bad thing in itself.
3)Out and about with three women...YOU'RE FEMME GAY.
Nothing wrong with that...but if you're not...one can
assume the worst case scenario...that you are deemed
SAFE and NON-THREATENING.
GUY 1:"Hey..check out that guy over there walking into the Victoria's Secret with those three hotties."
Guy 2:"No love.He's at the ass end of the the RULE OF 123.
Guy 2:"No love.He's at the ass end of the the RULE OF 123.
by L.MARTIN October 3, 2005
Get the RULE OF 123 mug.To deliver a verbal assault that leaves it's intended victim emotionally devastated...much like a gunman with a 9mm clip.Often heard amongst a group of aspiring rappers and
sucka' emcees when trying to deliver the knockout insult.
Also practiced by heartless bitches on men from whom they're about to take HALF!
sucka' emcees when trying to deliver the knockout insult.
Also practiced by heartless bitches on men from whom they're about to take HALF!
(EXAMPLE 1)INSTIGATOR: "Yo dog...homie said your rhymes flow
like shit in a sewer!Don't let that
go.EMPTY THE CLIP in his ass!
(EXAMPLE 2)HEARTLESS BITCH:"Look,you pencil dicked loser...
I've got five years and one baby
outta this marraige.I'm leaving
while I can still get my swerve
on.Attorneys will be in touch.
Ta ta."
MAN:"Oh."
like shit in a sewer!Don't let that
go.EMPTY THE CLIP in his ass!
(EXAMPLE 2)HEARTLESS BITCH:"Look,you pencil dicked loser...
I've got five years and one baby
outta this marraige.I'm leaving
while I can still get my swerve
on.Attorneys will be in touch.
Ta ta."
MAN:"Oh."
by L.MARTIN October 1, 2005
Get the EMPTY THE CLIP mug.FOR AVERAGE JOE HETEROSEXUAL:The point at which if a woman has'nt decided to do you(Trust me.-She knows.)...END.ALL.CONTACT! Either she's not into you...or worse...she'll continue to let you waste money time and attention on her.Painful as it may be-turn the page.Helpful hint:The wealthier you become...the more the world looks like a catalog.
FOR LESBIANS & GAYS: Shorten this to the "TWO EYEBLINK RULE"
Lucky fux!
FOR LESBIANS & GAYS: Shorten this to the "TWO EYEBLINK RULE"
Lucky fux!
DUDE 1:"So you takin' Mandy out tonite?"
DUDE 2:"Hell no.She talks too much.She keeps reminding me how incredibly smart she is...And to top it off she's maxed out the "TWO DATE RULE".Next.
DUDE 2:"Hell no.She talks too much.She keeps reminding me how incredibly smart she is...And to top it off she's maxed out the "TWO DATE RULE".Next.
by L.MARTIN September 27, 2005
Get the TWO DATE RULE mug.CARPENTER 1:"Say fella...would you step back n' take a look at
n'see how this door fits?"
CARPENTER 2:"Hmmm...'bout a coupla RED CUNT HAIRS off the
bottom oughta' do it.Break out the sander."
n'see how this door fits?"
CARPENTER 2:"Hmmm...'bout a coupla RED CUNT HAIRS off the
bottom oughta' do it.Break out the sander."
by L.MARTIN September 27, 2005
Get the RED CUNT HAIR mug.