L.MARTIN's definitions
Something that should be state law in all 50 states.When you consider that fully one third of ALL live births involve a man
other than the man alleged to be the father on the birth certificate...It would appear to serve justice and streamline the legal system if the real father is known from the get-go.
Not so.The state-and the legal industrial complex are just interested in tagging any convenient sucker with the bill.DO NOT be pressured to sign the birth certificate.Even if you "KNOW" that baby is yours...get the little saliva based test kit and BE SURE.Unless of course you don't mind paying for someone else's kid.
other than the man alleged to be the father on the birth certificate...It would appear to serve justice and streamline the legal system if the real father is known from the get-go.
Not so.The state-and the legal industrial complex are just interested in tagging any convenient sucker with the bill.DO NOT be pressured to sign the birth certificate.Even if you "KNOW" that baby is yours...get the little saliva based test kit and BE SURE.Unless of course you don't mind paying for someone else's kid.
HOMIE 1:"Yesterday my girl got pissed at me and said that little RAY RAY ain't mine.What if she's tellin' the truth?"
HOMIE 2:"How long y'all been together?"
HOMIE 1: "Coupla' years."
HOMIE 2:"Can't help 'ya.The law says that's your baby.
Shoulda' PATERNITY TESTED sometime within the first year.Sixteen years left.Have fun."
HOMIE 2:"How long y'all been together?"
HOMIE 1: "Coupla' years."
HOMIE 2:"Can't help 'ya.The law says that's your baby.
Shoulda' PATERNITY TESTED sometime within the first year.Sixteen years left.Have fun."
by L.MARTIN September 3, 2006
Get the PATERNITY TESTmug. Someone who lacks authority or power.When giving orders...or leading people...those you lead are more likely to follow if they respect your ability & competence.Otherwise-you might just as well be wearing something pink.
PROJECT MANAGER:"The schedule has us pouring the foundation tomorrow.Let's get 'er done!"
CONSTRUCTION WORKER:"Has this guy ever ever poured more than a cup of coffee? We're not even done tying the steel."
FOREMAN:"I'll deal with it.He's the Architects' nephew.Tryin' to get some work experience."
WORKER:"Oh great.The arky sends a PINK SWEATER out here to
bark orders.Send his ass to Starbuks."
CONSTRUCTION WORKER:"Has this guy ever ever poured more than a cup of coffee? We're not even done tying the steel."
FOREMAN:"I'll deal with it.He's the Architects' nephew.Tryin' to get some work experience."
WORKER:"Oh great.The arky sends a PINK SWEATER out here to
bark orders.Send his ass to Starbuks."
by L.MARTIN November 17, 2005
Get the PINK SWEATERmug. To deliver a verbal assault that leaves it's intended victim emotionally devastated...much like a gunman with a 9mm clip.Often heard amongst a group of aspiring rappers and
sucka' emcees when trying to deliver the knockout insult.
Also practiced by heartless bitches on men from whom they're about to take HALF!
sucka' emcees when trying to deliver the knockout insult.
Also practiced by heartless bitches on men from whom they're about to take HALF!
(EXAMPLE 1)INSTIGATOR: "Yo dog...homie said your rhymes flow
like shit in a sewer!Don't let that
go.EMPTY THE CLIP in his ass!
(EXAMPLE 2)HEARTLESS BITCH:"Look,you pencil dicked loser...
I've got five years and one baby
outta this marraige.I'm leaving
while I can still get my swerve
on.Attorneys will be in touch.
Ta ta."
MAN:"Oh."
like shit in a sewer!Don't let that
go.EMPTY THE CLIP in his ass!
(EXAMPLE 2)HEARTLESS BITCH:"Look,you pencil dicked loser...
I've got five years and one baby
outta this marraige.I'm leaving
while I can still get my swerve
on.Attorneys will be in touch.
Ta ta."
MAN:"Oh."
by L.MARTIN October 1, 2005
Get the EMPTY THE CLIPmug. by L.MARTIN September 14, 2005
Get the thoatmug. An upscale strip mall on a stretch of P.C.H. sandwiched between NEWPORT BEACH and LAGUNA BEACH.Twelve dollar hamburgers...Two hundred dollar cooking utensils...Day spa's...Hot milfy's pulling up in Escalades and Bentley sedans-kid in tow-for some shopping at the Gap...40/50 something guys in Astons and Ferraris sipping Starbux-and projecting power via horsepower...2-20 million dollar homes in the hills behind the mall...all overlooking the Pacific.In other words...A WHITE RAP VIDEO...only it's real.
NEWPORT COAST RESIDENT WITH BINOCULARS:"Looks like Jim cashed in some Broadcom stock options and bought a FORD GT.Take a look.He just pulled in to CRYSTAL COVE."
NEIGHBOR:"I'm not puttin'up with that! Time to take the cover off the McLAREN...goin' down for a cup of coffee."
N.C.R.W.B-"My VEYRON was just delivered a coupla' days ago.I'm right behind 'ya.He has to be put in check!"
NEIGHBOR:"I'm not puttin'up with that! Time to take the cover off the McLAREN...goin' down for a cup of coffee."
N.C.R.W.B-"My VEYRON was just delivered a coupla' days ago.I'm right behind 'ya.He has to be put in check!"
by L.MARTIN November 17, 2005
Get the CRYSTAL COVEmug. FOR AVERAGE JOE HETEROSEXUAL:The point at which if a woman has'nt decided to do you(Trust me.-She knows.)...END.ALL.CONTACT! Either she's not into you...or worse...she'll continue to let you waste money time and attention on her.Painful as it may be-turn the page.Helpful hint:The wealthier you become...the more the world looks like a catalog.
FOR LESBIANS & GAYS: Shorten this to the "TWO EYEBLINK RULE"
Lucky fux!
FOR LESBIANS & GAYS: Shorten this to the "TWO EYEBLINK RULE"
Lucky fux!
DUDE 1:"So you takin' Mandy out tonite?"
DUDE 2:"Hell no.She talks too much.She keeps reminding me how incredibly smart she is...And to top it off she's maxed out the "TWO DATE RULE".Next.
DUDE 2:"Hell no.She talks too much.She keeps reminding me how incredibly smart she is...And to top it off she's maxed out the "TWO DATE RULE".Next.
by L.MARTIN September 27, 2005
Get the TWO DATE RULEmug. The annoying tendency of our mainstream political/ news/entertainment industrial complex to have it's talking heads deliver thinly veiled messages of class warfare and bigotry.ALL mainstream ideological viewpoints are guilty of this.
When America wants to explore it's ills...social or otherwise...it usually explores it in the context of skin color first...class second...and finally as a problem to be solved-when it's hideously clear that it's EVERYONES problem.(this sometimes takes decades)...But since for better or worse one is unable anymore to flat-out offend/demean/impugn the sensibilities of this or that tribe...words and phrases are used in conjunction with pictures to form or reinforce assumptions of what or who the "problem" is.A coupla' "CODESPEAKS'GREATEST HITS" would include:
"CHILDREN BORN OUT OF WEDLOCK"-For decades the picture in your head was that of a Black welfare mother with no father in sight...probably still is...But when you factor in such things as divorce and White professional females having kids...man be damned...you see that if in fact households without men is a problem...it's everyones problem.
"HIV"-Does'nt make the headlines much anymore unless it relates to Africa or the porn industry...But not too long ago when the disease was a sure death sentence...you never heard a story about HIV that did'nt suggest that this was a disease of "THE INNER CITY"...And without fail-there would be a story every year about some young Black man just outta jail who moves into some suburban/rural White community and starts infecting the local White girls.Suggesting that as long as you were a White heterosexual...and you only fucked other White heterosexuals...you need not worry.Of course someone forgot to tell NASCAR star Tim Richmond this before he went off and infected 250 groupies-uh women with it on his way to that great oval in the sky.(he was white)Of course there were no stories either about the probably thousands of "UPPER-MIDDLE CLASS"
people who've been infected...yet becuase of private health insurance and privacy issues did'nt end up in the stats that are so often repeated.IT'S STILL EVERYONES PROBLEM.
"CRIME"-Are you kidding me?
When America wants to explore it's ills...social or otherwise...it usually explores it in the context of skin color first...class second...and finally as a problem to be solved-when it's hideously clear that it's EVERYONES problem.(this sometimes takes decades)...But since for better or worse one is unable anymore to flat-out offend/demean/impugn the sensibilities of this or that tribe...words and phrases are used in conjunction with pictures to form or reinforce assumptions of what or who the "problem" is.A coupla' "CODESPEAKS'GREATEST HITS" would include:
"CHILDREN BORN OUT OF WEDLOCK"-For decades the picture in your head was that of a Black welfare mother with no father in sight...probably still is...But when you factor in such things as divorce and White professional females having kids...man be damned...you see that if in fact households without men is a problem...it's everyones problem.
"HIV"-Does'nt make the headlines much anymore unless it relates to Africa or the porn industry...But not too long ago when the disease was a sure death sentence...you never heard a story about HIV that did'nt suggest that this was a disease of "THE INNER CITY"...And without fail-there would be a story every year about some young Black man just outta jail who moves into some suburban/rural White community and starts infecting the local White girls.Suggesting that as long as you were a White heterosexual...and you only fucked other White heterosexuals...you need not worry.Of course someone forgot to tell NASCAR star Tim Richmond this before he went off and infected 250 groupies-uh women with it on his way to that great oval in the sky.(he was white)Of course there were no stories either about the probably thousands of "UPPER-MIDDLE CLASS"
people who've been infected...yet becuase of private health insurance and privacy issues did'nt end up in the stats that are so often repeated.IT'S STILL EVERYONES PROBLEM.
"CRIME"-Are you kidding me?
CODESPEAK ANCHORMAN:"In the news today:Low test scores...affirmative action...new golf course!Back after this."
by L.MARTIN October 19, 2005
Get the CODESPEAKmug.