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L.MARTIN's definitions

DON KING MOMENT

Many talented people are very smart and good at what they do.Unfortunately they're very dumb about everything else...especially money.Don King knows this about fighters when he walks them into a conference room...has an assistant
open a briefcase with 100grand in it...and tells the fighter it's his as an advance for signing on with him.You've never seen that much money before.Of course-as your career takes off-you begin to realize that his "management fees" make the taxes look small.This does'nt just happen to atheletes.
Bill Gates...or Terry Semel...or Barry Diller...wants to "take a meeting"with you.He offers you 100 million for your company ...and "total control" before you even sit down. You try to avoid choking on your coffee.All those years in your cubicle at 80 grand a year.Of course you bite...and watch helplessly as you find that "total control" means you can leave work early on Friday.His henchmen then take your baby and turn it into a multi-billion dollar market leader...or more likely destroy
it before it destroys them.Classic DON KING MOMENT.
by L.MARTIN February 3, 2006
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ED HARDY

A tragically hip LA Based clothing brand.The brand started the new wave of urban hipster fashion along with CHROME HEARTS,AFFLICTION,JUICY...etc.Has come to signify an ability to overpay for loudly colored clothing.Has become a status signifier amongst BMER/BENZ driving club kids who still live at home.Cougar MILFS can be seen wearing it on bonding trips to the mall with their sociopath offspring. The preferred clothing of the DOUCHEBAG GENERATION.
NEWPORT BEACH/UCI HOTTIE:"My mom's in Aspen...but she just leased me this new C-CLASS-and left me the Amex for some shopping."

MUSCULAR TATTED OUT ACTOR WANNABE LOSER BOYFRIEND WITH HIDEOUSLY SPIKED HAIR:"Kewl! let's go down on Melrose.
I need a new ED HARDY tee."
by L.MARTIN December 29, 2007
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PINK SWEATER

Someone who lacks authority or power.When giving orders...or leading people...those you lead are more likely to follow if they respect your ability & competence.Otherwise-you might just as well be wearing something pink.
PROJECT MANAGER:"The schedule has us pouring the foundation tomorrow.Let's get 'er done!"

CONSTRUCTION WORKER:"Has this guy ever ever poured more than a cup of coffee? We're not even done tying the steel."

FOREMAN:"I'll deal with it.He's the Architects' nephew.Tryin' to get some work experience."

WORKER:"Oh great.The arky sends a PINK SWEATER out here to
bark orders.Send his ass to Starbuks."
by L.MARTIN November 17, 2005
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BARN FIND

The fantasy of collectors everywhere-(mostly automotive)-that they'll stumble upon a mint condition vintage 'Benz or Ferrari
in a barn or airplane hangar somewhere between N.Y/L.A....owned by someone just happy to get rid of it.Uh-huh.
COLLECTOR:"My 300SL Roadster was a BARN FIND from an estate sale on a river town in Southern Indiana.Family was just happy to be rid of the thing at 90k.Imagine that!"

COLLECTOR 2:"Enough with your fish stories!Even in desperation
nobody let's that rig go for less than 300K.There's photos of you at Barrett Jackson last month anyway."
by L.MARTIN October 14, 2005
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PAGE 10 MOMENT

A defining moment when you realize the gods are aligned against you in pursuit of a goal...That and the realization that your handlers/advisors are either stupid or covertly sabotaging you.In either case they should all be fired.
ANCHORMAN:"Subsequent candidates looking to challenge SENATOR CLINTON have all suffered a PAGE 10 MOMENT. Leaving her little choice but to polish her acceptance speech."
by L.MARTIN December 7, 2005
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MARRIAGE

1)The root cause of divorce.
2)The most successful wealth transfer scheme ever invented.
3)A contract-that if presented to you by an agent/lawyer-would
be sufficient grounds for a legal malpractice suit.
4)One sure way that the state can stay involved in your
life.FOREVER.
5)The point at which regular good sex stops...and infrequent
sex for procreation,manipulation,and/or passive-aggressive
destruction begins.
6)An institution that should be scrapped in favor of 1-3-5
year contracts...Not that you'll be any happier.
Marriage is wonderful.I can see why gay couples want to share in the experience.
by L.MARTIN July 5, 2006
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SEX-BASED ECONOMY

The reality that the modern American female does'nt have sex unless there is money involved.Such economy has always existed...but has been made more widely available to more women of varying degrees of savvy by that great class-leveling tool called:THE INTERNET.
If a woman is even barely attractive("6" or higher) she's:
1)Acting a/o directing a/o producing a/o selling porn.
2)Has a website(s) to that effect.
3)Is on numerous "modeling" sites.
4)Is on numerous "escort" sites.
5)Is on a coupla' porn casting agency sites.
6)Owns the casting agency.
7)Is stripping.
8)Earning money doing anything from "hot bod-bikini contests"...to repping for a liqour company at local bars...to being a spokesmodel for online gaming companies...to being the calendar/booth girl for import-tuner aftermarket car companies.
9)Got some guy(s) paying for anything from dinner...to rent
...to college...to cars...to real estate in her name...to
whatever the market will bear.
The maximum effective age band is between 18 and 35...much like a pro-ballplayer. Such gamesmanshp is no longer the province of the usual suspects...THEY'RE ALL DOING IT...because they can.
This new economic paradigm dovetails perfectly with the NEO-FEMINIST concept that as long as the money ends up in a womans pocket...anything goes.Women now define,re-define,and profit from their sexuality."WHORE" is no more an insult than two brothas' callin' each other "nigga"...And is usually delivered as a back-handed compliment from one woman to another in envy at ones ability to "game it" better.
This economy also weaves perfectly into the "traditional" legal/governmental set-up...in that even a most casual glance at the legal system finds women attorneys,judges,and politicians in abundance...Thus providing the institutional basis for protecting & bolstering this "new" economy.Yes,we are truly ... "a nation of laws and not of men."
BLIND IDIOT:"My woman and I relate to each other on a level
of love I've never known."

HONEST DRINKIN' BUDDY:"You're gonna make me puke!Check the scoreboard...She's 32...an ex-model who's been gaming the SEX-BASED ECONOMY since she was 16.She's toasted through her stamps...and you are happier n' a fly in shit to have her.
What's it like being a caddie?"
by L.MARTIN October 19, 2005
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