L.MARTIN's definitions

DIAMOND COMMERCIAL

When a man does something stupid a/o embarrasing a/o frivolous
for the "LOVE" of a woman.

OIL TRADER:..."So we're walking through the park...and we drop a blanket on the grass at the amphitheater...and as I
poured wine for us,I had JEFFREY OSBOURNE come out on stage and sing LOVE BALLAD...at which point I presented her with a 4ct. rock.-and a proposal.Cool,yeah?"

ARMS DEALER:"That is so fucking DIAMOND COMMERCIAL.Don't repeat it to anyone else.Congratulations."

by L.MARTIN December 5, 2005

PRE-NUP

A useless legal document easily voided by even the most average of divorce attorneys.What she does'nt get in alimony
or property settlement...she will more than get in CHILD SUPPORT.Why do you think she had them?

DIVORCEE'- "What are we gonna do? I stupidly signed that damn
pre-nup eight years ago.'The fuck was I thinking?"

ATTORNEY- "We're good.Courts care about the welfare of the
child over anything.Did I mention they don't
make you document where...or how you spend child
support payments? Little Emily is worth about
20 grand a month based on his present income.
The judge is a woman.I'll probably get you 25."

DIVORCEE'-"I think I love you."

ATTORNEY-"After this is over we'll do a weekend down in
St.Bartts.Bring your pill."

by L.MARTIN September 3, 2006

Diamond Cutter

PORN SLANG FOR A MALE PERFORMER WHO IS ABLE TO MAINTAIN A HARD ERECTION THROUGH THE ENTIRE SCENE.

"LEX WHIPPED OUT THE BIG DIAMOND CUTTER ON LITTLE BRIANNA.SHE GOT WIT' IT.GOOD FOOTAGE.PUT HER EYE OUT WITH THE MONEY SHOT."

by L.MARTIN September 15, 2005

PINK SWEATER

Someone who lacks authority or power.When giving orders...or leading people...those you lead are more likely to follow if they respect your ability & competence.Otherwise-you might just as well be wearing something pink.

PROJECT MANAGER:"The schedule has us pouring the foundation tomorrow.Let's get 'er done!"

CONSTRUCTION WORKER:"Has this guy ever ever poured more than a cup of coffee? We're not even done tying the steel."

FOREMAN:"I'll deal with it.He's the Architects' nephew.Tryin' to get some work experience."

WORKER:"Oh great.The arky sends a PINK SWEATER out here to
bark orders.Send his ass to Starbuks."

by L.MARTIN November 17, 2005

DON KING MOMENT

Many talented people are very smart and good at what they do.Unfortunately they're very dumb about everything else...especially money.Don King knows this about fighters when he walks them into a conference room...has an assistant
open a briefcase with 100grand in it...and tells the fighter it's his as an advance for signing on with him.You've never seen that much money before.Of course-as your career takes off-you begin to realize that his "management fees" make the taxes look small.This does'nt just happen to atheletes.

Bill Gates...or Terry Semel...or Barry Diller...wants to "take a meeting"with you.He offers you 100 million for your company ...and "total control" before you even sit down. You try to avoid choking on your coffee.All those years in your cubicle at 80 grand a year.Of course you bite...and watch helplessly as you find that "total control" means you can leave work early on Friday.His henchmen then take your baby and turn it into a multi-billion dollar market leader...or more likely destroy
it before it destroys them.Classic DON KING MOMENT.

by L.MARTIN February 3, 2006

BARN FIND

The fantasy of collectors everywhere-(mostly automotive)-that they'll stumble upon a mint condition vintage 'Benz or Ferrari
in a barn or airplane hangar somewhere between N.Y/L.A....owned by someone just happy to get rid of it.Uh-huh.

COLLECTOR:"My 300SL Roadster was a BARN FIND from an estate sale on a river town in Southern Indiana.Family was just happy to be rid of the thing at 90k.Imagine that!"

COLLECTOR 2:"Enough with your fish stories!Even in desperation
nobody let's that rig go for less than 300K.There's photos of you at Barrett Jackson last month anyway."

by L.MARTIN October 14, 2005

ED HARDY

A tragically hip LA Based clothing brand.The brand started the new wave of urban hipster fashion along with CHROME HEARTS,AFFLICTION,JUICY...etc.Has come to signify an ability to overpay for loudly colored clothing.Has become a status signifier amongst BMER/BENZ driving club kids who still live at home.Cougar MILFS can be seen wearing it on bonding trips to the mall with their sociopath offspring. The preferred clothing of the DOUCHEBAG GENERATION.

NEWPORT BEACH/UCI HOTTIE:"My mom's in Aspen...but she just leased me this new C-CLASS-and left me the Amex for some shopping."

MUSCULAR TATTED OUT ACTOR WANNABE LOSER BOYFRIEND WITH HIDEOUSLY SPIKED HAIR:"Kewl! let's go down on Melrose.
I need a new ED HARDY tee."

by L.MARTIN December 29, 2007