9 definitions by Johnny hates NOVA

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A southern suburb of Washington, DC that is located in the rolling hills of northern Virginia. This community of "trust fund babies" and selfish, shallow "richers" will not allow economic growth or an actual working "blue collar" sect of people into it's town. Populated by rich coke heads that have old English style names such as "Chadwick Dunston Elffson Watley III", Middleburg is known for it's anti-gun, anti-religion, pro-abortion liberalism as well as it's talent to look down upon actual working people, because of all the "Old Money" floating around. "Fox Hunting", "Steeple Chase" as well as other wealthy English sports are the main attraction in this shallow place to live. If you don't have money, and your ancestors weren't Protestants from the Mayflower, don't bother going near this town. They'll chase you out with their Land-Rovers, Mercedes, and Cadillac Escalades.
If you're poor, don't bother visiting Middleburg, Virginia.
by Johnny Hates NOVA August 04, 2005
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This "Steel Belt" area of the northern Midwest is another example of a dying breed in America that has become all too common in the last 20 years. Lake County is known for it's past historical achievements in gaining government contracts throughout 2 World Wars and the "Reaganomics" stockpiling of arms throughout the 1980's. The area prides itself on being one of the centers of steel and Industrial production along the "Steel Belt" from Erie, Pa up to Green Bay, Wi. However, in the last 15 years, the area continues to inflict misery upon it's inhabitants with it's increasing inflation of pricing in everything from rent ceilings to the subsidy of local unions, who hold politicians at a "gunpoint business" stance so as to continue their stranglehold upon the area's economy. Murder rates have continued to skyrocket in Lake County's cities such as Gary, Hammond and Merrillville, and the oversensitive Black community seems all to eager to pull out their freshly minted "race cards" to bait their way into local jobs and housing markets they intend to later destroy with drugs, gangbangers and lack of work ethic. Long past are the ghosts of "the American Dream" in this area, because quite frankly, a person CANNOT attain a decent job that adequately pays the high taxes and will allow that person to ascend their socio-economic ladder individually. In Lake County, labor unions hold basically all decent waged jobs and have established a vicious "glass ceiling" of hegemony over politics and society at large. Unskilled part time workers are victimized in terms of job availibility to biased companies that wish to hire insincere, lazy minorities to meet their "equal opportunity diversity status quo". This broken economy coupled with physically overcrowded, filthy, crime riddled streets makes this quite possibly the worst choice for a young person wishing to make something of themselves while trying to raise a family.
Welcome to Lake County, Indiana, owned by NIPSCO.
by Johnny Hates NOVA March 20, 2006
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Quite possibly may be the biggest reason for the economic success of the New York Yankees. The Yankees fans pride themselves on being "hardcore" and virulently support the "Evil Empire" year after year, wearing the hats and buying the jerseys. The one problem with Yankees fans is the fact that every single gang-banger in the United States supports this "business" of a baseball team by buying their hats or placing them in the back of their Cadillac Escalade/Buick Regal/generic hood ride. One other problem with Yankees fans is that worldwide they are known to be a group of yuppies that honestly get behind a team that always wins because of it's tactics at buying its championships. Generic sounding rappers and DJ's also fit into the sub category of Yankees' followers. When one turns on BET, one sees the same style of video with former-future gangbanger-drug slinger trying to dodge bullets/dance wearing a black/red/white Yankees hat. Completely void of originality is a typical Yankees fan, relying on the "frontrunning" that probably 80% of Yankees fans do.
Yankees Fans wouldn't show up if the Yankees sucked, but that's not going to happen, if $teinbrenner and Ca$hman keep buying their Series for their fellow "Noo Yawkaz"
by Johnny hates NOVA May 08, 2006
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Established as a "satellite campus" of the main campus in West Lafayette, Indiana, Purdue University Calumet was founded as full time university in the northwestern corner of Indiana. Purdue Calumet prides itself on maintaining good standards while at the same preparing its students for the economy and world beyond the borders of Democratic dominated Lake County. Having accomplished a great victory in borrowing the Purdue name, Purdue Calumet then decided to implement a typical Lake County tradition: Overcharge the students, and make introductory course work seemingly impossible in the non-liberal arts departments so as to continue the gouging. Purdue Calumet prefers to charge its students insane tuition and other "non-deferential" charges so as to turn over large profits yearly. Of course with all the Democratic "Chicago Machine" government and infleunce in the way, it's telltale that the IRS would never really come after Purdue Calumet, after all, as long as prominent local goverment leaders are driving to work in a brand new Mercedes Benz, the IRS and the rest of the outside world won't know any better. Although Purdue Calumet is a state funded school, and by law NOT supposed to adapt to any particular poltical stance or party, Purdue Calumet just loves to make shoe polish out of shit. Instead of looking at an issue in a different light, Purdue Calumet's teachers and many students are quick to hop on the "anti-everything" bandwagon, even though at time, facts may not be clear and concise. This school makes it a seemingly serious offense to be conservative and actually believe in something if it's not on Ted Kennedy's or Jesse Jackson's camera chasing agenda. Take the War in Iraq as example. Rather than tell unwashed, uninformed, and clearly biased protestors to just stay at home or take their protesting elsewhere, the school invites them in and gives them podium time allowing them to piss and moan about how evil the US government is. Purdue Calumet is known for their gift at alienating certain groups of people. The school is quick to give concessions based on race to blacks, but not the same treatment to white or hispanic students, and the school harbors deep resentment towards ex-military and War Veterans in general, often times treating them with a paternalistic, second hand attitude.
Purdue Calumet: Enroll today to get ripped off.

Yeah, they make the basic science and math courses harder than need be, so Liberal Arts majors will fail and have to pay more money. It's a typical Lake County scam.
by Johnny hates NOVA May 08, 2006
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Having immigrated to the United States, whether it be legally or illegally, many Mexican youths become "Vatos" and "Esse's" to find solidarity and common bond within street gangs. These uneducated, Spanish slurring "drains on society" have no real life value at all, and further hinder the United States' "free lunch" social systems in terms of healthcare and housing. Like gangs of the past times and centuries, Mexican Gang Bangers identify themselves with stereotypical fashion statements and indemnifying traits, such as "murder tattoos". Most murder tattoos for these bottom feeders are tear drops down the corner of the eye, or crucifixes. Their fashion usually consists of Dickies worker pants, shaved heads, goateed facial hair, wife beater undershirts and flannel shirts, buttoned one at the top. Mexican Gang Bangers usually start their day with eating a healthy breakfast of methamphetamines or marijuana, then their day usually consists of sitting around mama's house, drinking 40 oz malt liquor and possibly a trip to the corner outside to try and hassle a white person out of their wallet or purse by means of gunpoint threats. Like gangs before, Mexican Gang Bangers drain a society of it's resources, because in the United States, "Something for Nothing" just doesn't work at all. Instead of attaining a job and putting into society through taxes, insurance, and labor, these greasers use free healthcare provided in low-income neighborhoods ar free clinics, and then spread HIV and other diseases through their use of drugs and sexual practices on children. Rather than get an education and learn to speak English, "Vatos" would rather use the age-old "Hispanic excuse" of "culture" as a means to justify their ignorance and uselessness in society as a whole subdivision of illiterate Mexican immigrants.
Mexican Gang Bangers like to sling crack and methamphetamines to naive people in their own community.

I saw a couple of Mexican Gang Bangers on the corner the other day, trying to intimidate middle class families walking by.

Mexican Gang Bangers don't learn to speak english, their "culture" caters to them and they don't have to.
by Johnny Hates Nova April 10, 2006
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Out of the thousands of female soldiers and marines that have served combat tours in Iraq (notice how I DON'T include recognition of the two "taxi services" Air Force/Navy, that's for a reason for Iraq Veterans to know), many have served with remarkable distinction, overcoming tremendous odds in a military that is still primarily shifted towards the stronger and more suitable male sex. Many females have done their tour amidst personal choices and immense pressure not only on the streets of Iraq, but on the homefront as well. Then there are those females that use their limited status and limited population numbers to advantageous victories previously unheard of. Facing reality, there are far fewer females in the deployed combat forces of the Army and Marines, and many young, testosterone fueled males abjectively make regular, "plain jane" women into "Iraqi Cinderellas". Once considered average and not having any male attention at all on the shores of America, these females attract attention not even through their sheer will power or charm but by default of population and male libido. These females are normally called "mopeds" or even "fugly" back here in "the World" but become princesses in Iraq, and valued at a high price, use their pathetic bodies in such a way as to have services, bills, sexual favors, everyday tasks, and even financial support doled out in front of them by pathetic males looking for a cure to the "blue balls syndrome" that a mostly male environment brings. The all true formula of the Cinderella tale works in perfect the fact that at the end of a combat tour, these Iraqi Cinderellas turn back into hideous halflings, wondering why upon return to normal American society why men, even good looking men won't lay down in front of them at their beck and call.
Many times over "Iraqi Cinderellas" will sleep with upper level non-commissioned officers and commissioned officers so as to gain rank and personal favor.

Iraqi Cinderellas are constantly worried by the 11th month of the tour about the clock striking midnight, and that inevitable return to uglydom and normalcy that a redepolyment back to the United States will bring.

If you pay attention, many port o shitters in transient camps such as Camp Virginia contain the phrase "be ready Cinderellas, the pumpkin carriage is about to shrivel" or "Look out Cinderella, the clock is about to strike midnight!"
by Johnny HATES nova June 04, 2006
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Located in Miami, Florida, the Marlins were a franchise that began it's genesis in the early 1990's during the end of Major Leage Baseball's expansion boom. After settling in the former Don Shula stadium, the team was welcomed by a typical fiery fanbase that prides itself on being a "multi-cultural" society. Soon though the welcoming applause fell out the window, and the fans soon realized that like most expansion teams, this one sure did suck. After many mediocre to ill-failed seasons, the Marlins finally found success in 1996 after beating the Cleveland Indians in the Fall Classic. Fortunately for "Tribe Fans" it was actually a good thing that a worthless, economic failure had beaten their beloved original early twentieth century founded team, because the fanbase simply walked away after the Marlins failed and failed again in the next few seasons to close out the century looking like a true feces stain on Bud Selig's trousers. Of course, the fanbase would repeat their history again, by walking away from their team again, that they had so virulently supported during the 2003 World Series, when they defeated a very deserving Chicago Cubs squad to make it to the worst World Series ever to beat the undeserving "Evil Empire" Yankees. The Marlin fans are an odd sort, taking pride in investing their earned money on a team that wins terrible and forgettable 'Series. Of course, this just amounts to a group of truly uninterested and undevoted "Fairweather fans" that just show up IF their low scoring Marlins actually make it to the playoffs. The Marlins are once again finding the low point of the charts, as their forgettable players, fairweather fans and eyesore place in history books drift off into the Gulf of Worthlessness.
The Marlins only sell out when they are in the playoffs.

Yeah, the Marlins and the White Sox have won 3 of the worst World Series championships ever.
by Johnny Hates NOVA April 28, 2006
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