John Wesley's definitions
by John Wesley February 9, 2008

A person so incredibly stupid that if it were not for the conveniences of modern technology and public safety, they would have been weeded out, starved or eaten way before they reached adulthood. So prominent is the unnatural selection that these people not only survive, they thrive and breed more darwin babies.
Darwin Baby: "I decided to change my own oil just to see if I could but I didnt know it would take so long to refill the new oil down that little tube where the dipstick is."
Casual Observer: "Darwin Baby"
Casual Observer: "Darwin Baby"
by John Wesley February 9, 2008

Honest to God only having a full tank of gas, a half a pack of cigarettes, its night and wearing sunglasses while being at a minimum 106 miles from Chicago or anywhere else. Generally, taking a roadtrip with little or nothing to your name for survival.
by John Wesley February 12, 2008

The guy in the hot tub that, like the Hot Tub Meerkat, can't quite commit to sitting all the way down but, damnit, they are trying, resulting in an act that resembles the Japanese Snow Monkey.
I was heading to the hot tub when i spotted the Hot Tub Snow Monkey and decided it was too fucking weird, I think i'll hit the sauna.
by John Wesley February 9, 2008

Procedure to remove someone from the face of the earth that is over the age of 18 that you know is unwanted, unproductive, a drain to natural resources or otherwise known as someone that you are pretty sure should not have been here in the first place.
by John Wesley February 9, 2008

artistic expression used to describe the latest flood of cookie cutter songs from every current-era female pop musician. Recognizable by the usual accompaniment of pianos or violins, these are the songs that are inducing the collective menstrual cycles of the radio free world. Although usually reserved for female musicians, the term can, in some instances, be applied to the critique of male musicians if the estrogen level is deemed beyond the “Seminal Trappings” term assigned to the same music.
Female: Recently, while watching VH1, I found myself really enjoying the Vaginal Moanings of Sara Bareilles and Taylor Swift.
Male: Recently, while watching VH1, I found myself really enjoying the Vaginal Moanings of James Blunt.
Male: Recently, while watching VH1, I found myself really enjoying the Vaginal Moanings of James Blunt.
by John Wesley February 6, 2008

Someone who sets up a blank phantom page that grants them entry into other peoples MySpace for the sole purpose of being nosey and gleaning peoples personal information without contributing anything back.
1. "How the hell did Kristin find out about last weekend?"
2. "Oh, she's a Myspace Weasel, she probably finger fucked your page for anything useful.
2. "Oh, she's a Myspace Weasel, she probably finger fucked your page for anything useful.
by John Wesley February 11, 2008
