John Wesley's definitions

Terry Weed

Central Alabama marijuana so strong, one toke can take down an entire boat crew. Characterized by foul odor, foul taste, hydroponically grown with magic frog urine and laced with cat tranquilizers. Typically found in the "Skeeter Leg".

When everyone came up missing, I went to the back of the boat and found them all passed out from smoking Terry Weed.

by John Wesley February 9, 2008

Cat Eyes

The untanned area directly under a girls ass cheeks that resemble cat eyes when bent over. Resulting from neither the suns nor the tanning beds ability to shine there.

Shelly bent over and it looked like a giant pair of cat eyes staring back at me.

by John Wesley February 11, 2008

Crack Ho Skinny Diet

Diet so severe and lacking in nutrition, the person on it either has the goal of looking like a crack whore or trying to get back down to their birth weight. Composed of "nibbling" instead of eating, even buffet plates of food look like appetizers. Food items such as tacos and burritos are comprised of a few small pieces of rinsed turkey meat and a single sliver of cheese (if they splurge). The avid dieter even orders small waters to go with their salads to avoid the calories ice contains.

Customer: "i'll have the 3 inch turkey club sandwich with the turkey meat dragged across the bread, a pickle with no juice and a small water."
Subway: "you must be on the crack ho skinny diet."

Dieter: "I like to put lemon juice on my baked potatoe as a butter substitute, tastes just like it"
Observer: "you dumb bitch, lemon makes anything taste like LEMON!"

by John Wesley February 12, 2008

Vollie

Volunteer Firefighter. Characterized by their custom maltese cross back window sticker and general disregard for driving safety while using their "flashers". Can also be spotted easily "off duty" (wal-mart, sonic, dollar general) wearing parts of their on-duty clothes and overtly apparent pagers. Most have a wallet badge and emergency trauma bag in their back seat containing just enough shit to get them in a slightly worse situation than they already are.

I had a fender bender and 2 Vollies stopped and held c-spine on me. Needless to say, I didn't panic and "felt" like I would be OK, mostly because they told me I would.

by John Wesley February 9, 2008

Dildopotamus

A dildo so large, one could find easier ways of inserting a hippo instead. Usually a gag gift, but you know if they make it somebody can sure the hell use it. As a derogatory remark, something (person, animal, thing, etc.) may be called a Dildopotamus in reference to the fact that besides looking like a dick, otherwise, they are useless.

I ordered some sex toys off the internet and they left this giant dildopotamus on my doorstep.

If you dont quit calling things a dildopotamus in front of the baby, shes going to wind up saying it.

by John Wesley February 13, 2008

Cot Jockey

Ambulance driver. Usually characterized by their NREMT patch and window decal. Can also be spotted easily "off duty" (wal-mart, sonic, dollar general) wearing parts of their on-duty clothes and overtly apparent pager.

It took 2 crews of cot jockeys to load their fat ass in that ambulance.

by John Wesley February 9, 2008

Transmissional Homosexuality

A condition where the more professional a person tries to sound on a two-way radio, the gayer it comes out.

Transmissional Homosexuality: Engine Company is on the scene
Dispatch: FABULOUS!!

by John Wesley February 9, 2008