What's happening in the other room when you hear very loud moaning coming from your dad's laptop speakers before he frantically turns down the volume.
Brother: Where's dad? He just disappeared...
Sister: I don't know. He's probably having a father fap or something.
Sister: I don't know. He's probably having a father fap or something.
by Jack Atrophy August 09, 2022
Get the father fap mug.The creepy and immoral practice of glancing quickly at another dude's dick while pissing at a urinal.
by Jack Atrophy August 07, 2022
Get the es-pee-onage mug.Often times, plight of hand forces artists to obscure a figure's hands behind objects placed strategically in the foreground of the composition.
by Jack Atrophy August 06, 2022
Get the plight of hand mug.by Jack Atrophy August 07, 2022
Get the pleasure lumps mug.We heard your toilet farts echoing in there. Turning on the shower water didn't hide a thing. Don't believe for one moment that your little act of subturdfuge was successful.
by Jack Atrophy August 09, 2022
Get the subturdfuge mug.All of the factors in a social system that that perpetuate, enable, and incentivize the adoption of identities based in victimhood.
"Why are people listing their ailments in their Twitter bios?"
"Oh, it's a great way to rack up intersectional points and climb up a few tiers in the victim hierarchy."
"Why would they want to do that?"
"Because with victimhood comes a whole bunch of perks. If you are a victim, you always have an excuse to fail. You always have a hypothetical oppressor to blame. You are given license to censure anyone who disagrees with you. You receive an abundance of pity. And best of all, you get to envision yourself as the noble underdog struggling in the next big civil rights movement!"
"That sounds pathological."
"That's because it is... and it is all a product of systemic victimhood."
"Oh, it's a great way to rack up intersectional points and climb up a few tiers in the victim hierarchy."
"Why would they want to do that?"
"Because with victimhood comes a whole bunch of perks. If you are a victim, you always have an excuse to fail. You always have a hypothetical oppressor to blame. You are given license to censure anyone who disagrees with you. You receive an abundance of pity. And best of all, you get to envision yourself as the noble underdog struggling in the next big civil rights movement!"
"That sounds pathological."
"That's because it is... and it is all a product of systemic victimhood."
by Jack Atrophy August 06, 2022
Get the systemic victimhood mug.When your penis suddenly twitches in anticipation of arousal from a stimulus that your eyes prematurely judge as sexy. A perfect example of this is when you’re in the grocery store and you spot a deliciously fat ass waddling down the yogurt aisle. Your prick twitches– but then you realize it’s a grotesque old man!
The other day I was driving past the horse pasture when I got a prick twitch! I looked down and said, “False alarm, buddy.”
by Jack Atrophy August 06, 2022
Get the prick twitch mug.