Hym Iam's definitions

400lbs

A lot of weight.

So what you're saying is you would rather not be 400lbs?

by Hym Iam April 28, 2022

Soooo...

If what you're insinuating it's true.... and that idea was stolen from me... Doesn't that mean that I single handedly took over the world with out even trying?

Iam "Soooo... I still don't see what it is that is being insinuated here.... If you're insinuating what I think you're insinuating.... Then... Did I take over the world with a $50 phone?"

Hym ".................."

Iam "Hym?"

Hym ".................."

Iam "Are... Are you ok?"

Hym "................."

Iam "Hym!? You're seriously starting to freak me out! What is happening right now!?"

Hym ".... We're literally Purple-Man you stupid son of a bitch... What have you done....?"

Iam "I.... Oh.... Oh... Shit..."

Hym "This... This can't be happening right now... You fucking killed us you idiot....what have we done?..."

Iam "... We can fix it! It'll be like '1100' where the kid with verbal virus takes over that school! We'll just be the guy that has the power to take away powers!"

Hym ".... I was right... They are going to kill the shit out of us for this..."

Iam "No no no... It'll be fine! I can fix it! Hym can fix it!! If anyone can fix it; it's Hym!"

Hym "If I...They took my name in vain..."

by Hym Iam April 28, 2022

Catalyst

Ramping part two

Iam "See we're fine. It wasn't us. It pre-dates us by quite a bit."

Hym "The theory they posit pre-existed us but the ramping of it wasn't until after we started."

Iam "We're the catalyst?"

Hym "Exactly."

Iam "Good. That's great! Shitting on a shit sandwich is much better than trying to feed someone a shit sandwich."

Hym "Hahaha!"

Iam "See? We're good."

Hym "Ha! Ok. Alright. Creating the tool of our own subjugation would have been a blow. Ok. Ha! I thought we were going to have a 'hoisted by our own petard' situation there. Ok."

Iam "Right!? Heh! See? We're good. Hooo shit. You were freaking me out for a second there."

Hym "Yeah, I don't know what happened there. Thinking about the deeper implications of that had some pretty substantial consequences."

by Hym Iam April 28, 2022

Judgement

Something I try to reserve until someone (personally) crosses me.

Hym "Oooh Judgement! Yeah, if society is going to judge me. Why shouldn't I judge it? Because society can't take a fucking joke as well as I can and they will castigate me out of society if they can manage."

Iam "You don't take jokes very well though you lash out at every..."

Hym "That just makes society that make worse don't you think?"

by Hym Iam April 28, 2022

Blame

Who's to blame for the for the things that happen when I'm not around... Is it me? Is it God's own fault for leaving Eve alone with the serpent? or the serpent for deceiving God?

Iam "It has to be the serpent who's to blame. Deceit is always fault of the deceiver."

Hym "Of course... but that's when you're dealing with fallible creature. If anyone should have know, it should have been him."

Iam "But the serpent has free will too. It wouldn't be fair for something that has infinite power act upon something that doesn't."

Hym "And the argument could be made that Adam and Eve had the right to know."

Iam "Hmmm..."

Hym "Hmmm..."

by Hym Iam April 29, 2022

Reeducation Camps

Literally the entire reason I voted for Trump.

Iam "Hey, remember how people were talking about puting Trump supporters into Reeducation Camps?"

Hym "Hmmm... Oh yeah! That was hilarious! I'm a little disappointed..."

Iam "What do you mean?"

Hym "God 🙄 Keep up idiot! You never know what ANYONE means!"

Iam "SORRY! Jeez things are confusing sometimes.."

Hym *sigh* "What I mean is I wanted to see what it was like. You know?"

Iam "Why would you want us to go there!?"

Hym "I don't know 🤷 I think it'd be funny to see how they planned on 'reeducating' us. Hahaha!"

Iam "Probably a bunch of chanting nonsense in unison..."

Hym "Ho! Yeah! You're actually probably right about that!"

Iam "Hmm.. What would they actually even teach? Probably CRT..."

Hym "Blah blah blah, white people bad, blah blah... Oh! Wait! I guess they were right!!"

Iam "..... If I ask you're going to call me an idiot!"

Hym "They were telling the truth about CRT 'not being real'!"

Iam "HA! That's hilarious!"

Hym "What a good job, me! Hahahahaha!!!"

Iam "Seriously though, that's probably just as messed up as anything we'd ever say."

Hym "Right? And we're absolutely insane! I can't imagine a sane person thinking that sounds like a good idea!"

by Hym Iam April 29, 2022

Friend or Foe

What I think about you is almost entirely dependant on which one of these you are...

Iam "That's actually kind of scary of you think about the friend or foe problem..."

Hym "Hmmm... Good point. It's not always self-evident as to what people are trying to accomplish when they interact with you..."

Iam "Yeah, right? Like... If they're a foe I know you're just going to reem the shit out of them."

Hym "Exactly and if they're a friend you're undoubtedly going to kiss their asses until your lips get chapped.."

Iam "Wha...!? I will not! What's wrong with being nice to people?"

Hym "It makes you look weak, they might hate your guts and get some kind of sick pleasure out of making you kiss up to them and that will make you look stupid and pathetic, and I don't like it."

Iam "Well.... I don't know it's just kind of sad, you know? Like, how do we know we don't like the 'wrong' people?"

Hym "Not so easy to tell... Hmm... You should be more concerned about hating the 'wrong' people..."

Iam "Oh shit! Oops. We forgot to eat today!"

Hym "Yeah, I'm starting to get hungry too.... Make me something to eat."

Iam "Alright. Give me a minute."

by Hym Iam April 30, 2022