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Hifalutin!'s definitions

My Nicest Mask

A jet-black KN95 just won’t do for church, travel or mad clubbing at the Gold Room.
“It’s a glitter bomb, what can I say,” tear-streaked Angie apologizes as she steps out of Frank E. Campbell funeral home “– it’s My Nicest Mask.”

“It might only be Spirit,” Guppy explained, “but after postponing this trip for two years I am sure gonna put on My Nicest Mask—and eat any damn in-flight non-GMO peanuts they provide.”
by Hifalutin! February 5, 2022
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Crotchspin

Ice skaters performing lifts grab the best handle available.
“Wow,” Panda says, glued to the ice dancing in Beijing. “Digging the crotchspin.”
“Ahh, Good One,” sneers mama, who loves to abuse Panda’s street name. “The closest you came to a skate was Sugar Pond Warming Hut in 1990.”
Right, daydreams Panda. That bitchin’ Brian Maleski, he knew his way around a crotchspin. The ice was hard too.
by Hifalutin! February 7, 2022
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Casserole

“They’re still working with Leo on his toileting – it’s about time, he’s entering kindeegarden soon!” said Grandmaw, “ – so we were happy when the tike left us a nice casserole in the powder room w.c.”
“I thought I smelled something,” said Kath.
“No, that’s the venison stew,” said Grandmaw. “Soup’s on soon.”

Her homeys consigned Beatrice to the garret of Delta Sigma Theta, which had a private bath. When she protested, she was told that her casseroles were too fragrant for the shared space below.
by Hifalutin! March 6, 2022
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Pretty masks make you sick!

Caution from one citizen to another regarding the insufficient protective qualities of cloth masking.
"Pretty masks make you sick!" said Henry as his ladyfriend Wendy came around the corner, showing off her new daisy-printed hand-sewn cotton mask. "N-95s all the way, dude!"
by Hifalutin! January 13, 2022
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UrbanDictionary.com

A supersweet time assassin if you’re down to seeds and stems, laid off, lovelost and unable to get your shoulder rotator pins because of all the Covid creeps taking up hospital beds.
“Please honey,” said Dawna, “won’t you come fit your body in this comfy bed? I have the Astroglide warmed up just the way you like it.”

“No, darlin’, can’t,” is Max’s rejoinder. “My phone just charged. UrbanDictionary.com called, and you know the emotional fallout if I don’t obey.”

“I yelled out in my sleep, but it wasn’t a nightmare,” Miranda said, uncharacteristically calm. “It was an UrbanDictionary.com rabbit hole, and my brain slurped it up like warm potato soup.”
by Hifalutin! February 3, 2022
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bRoku

The predictable failure of streaming-related technology.
“Grrrr,” storms Penelope. “Why does it have to be bRoku right when we’re on the last episode of Sort Of?”

“We’ll have to do Get Back at your place,” I explained lamely. “Our set is bRoku again.”
by Hifalutin! January 30, 2022
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Ridickulous

Adj., overly forward male suitor.
It was time to quit the Ramble, Panda knew, when the ridickulous combover next to him on the bench cleared his throat, put a hand on The Good One’s Carhartted knee and began to praise the Norway maples. Panda just went there for the birds.

Archie said, "I may be intersex and whatever, but that doesn't mean I appreciated ridickulous purple-tanned Brad in a rainbow speedo bouncing up behind me last summer at Cherries On the Bay."
by Hifalutin! February 4, 2022
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