Hifalutin!'s definitions
“Love you Want you Need you,” snivels Patrick in his 14th text message of the day.
“It’s this very bleakiness that turns me off,” sniffs Tinsley. “It’s become an endless drag, a plague – he’s a boiled bullfrog and he’s the last to grasp it.”
“A boiled bullfrog!” says heartthrob Benjamin when notified that Arabella refused to accept his bouquet of Equadorian red roses. "First, the Hanky Panky thongs, which I could return, and now this. I never thought I’d see the day when I would play that croaking fool, but Arabella has had me slaving at her feet for months and I will never be free.”
“It’s this very bleakiness that turns me off,” sniffs Tinsley. “It’s become an endless drag, a plague – he’s a boiled bullfrog and he’s the last to grasp it.”
“A boiled bullfrog!” says heartthrob Benjamin when notified that Arabella refused to accept his bouquet of Equadorian red roses. "First, the Hanky Panky thongs, which I could return, and now this. I never thought I’d see the day when I would play that croaking fool, but Arabella has had me slaving at her feet for months and I will never be free.”
by Hifalutin! February 10, 2022
Get the a boiled bullfrog mug."We think we know the perfect bachelorette gift for solitary Martha," said Penelope, always down with the latest trends. "This dude is a regular jizzmatron. I've already placed the order."
"Covid layoffs left me without a job," said Howie the paralegal. "So I plundered the gig economy for work as a jizzdroid. Pretty sweet all around."
"Covid layoffs left me without a job," said Howie the paralegal. "So I plundered the gig economy for work as a jizzdroid. Pretty sweet all around."
by Hifalutin! January 22, 2022
Get the Jizzmatron mug.“Grrrr,” storms Penelope. “Why does it have to be bRoku right when we’re on the last episode of Sort Of?”
“We’ll have to do Get Back at your place,” I explained lamely. “Our set is bRoku again.”
“We’ll have to do Get Back at your place,” I explained lamely. “Our set is bRoku again.”
by Hifalutin! January 30, 2022
Get the bRoku mug.A supersweet time assassin if you’re down to seeds and stems, laid off, lovelost and unable to get your shoulder rotator pins because of all the Covid creeps taking up hospital beds.
“Please honey,” said Dawna, “won’t you come fit your body in this comfy bed? I have the Astroglide warmed up just the way you like it.”
“No, darlin’, can’t,” is Max’s rejoinder. “My phone just charged. UrbanDictionary.com called, and you know the emotional fallout if I don’t obey.”
“I yelled out in my sleep, but it wasn’t a nightmare,” Miranda said, uncharacteristically calm. “It was an UrbanDictionary.com rabbit hole, and my brain slurped it up like warm potato soup.”
“No, darlin’, can’t,” is Max’s rejoinder. “My phone just charged. UrbanDictionary.com called, and you know the emotional fallout if I don’t obey.”
“I yelled out in my sleep, but it wasn’t a nightmare,” Miranda said, uncharacteristically calm. “It was an UrbanDictionary.com rabbit hole, and my brain slurped it up like warm potato soup.”
by Hifalutin! February 3, 2022
Get the UrbanDictionary.com mug.It was time to quit the Ramble, Panda knew, when the ridickulous combover next to him on the bench cleared his throat, put a hand on The Good One’s Carhartted knee and began to praise the Norway maples. Panda just went there for the birds.
Archie said, "I may be intersex and whatever, but that doesn't mean I appreciated ridickulous purple-tanned Brad in a rainbow speedo bouncing up behind me last summer at Cherries On the Bay."
Archie said, "I may be intersex and whatever, but that doesn't mean I appreciated ridickulous purple-tanned Brad in a rainbow speedo bouncing up behind me last summer at Cherries On the Bay."
by Hifalutin! February 4, 2022
Get the Ridickulous mug.“I was glad I’d done due diligence on the Peloton,” aging Alice grinned as she snugged up her Eileen Fisher trousers. “I wanted the fanny mail I texted The Boss to be taut, and you should have seen that shit.”
“Tracy’s gone over the deep end, gifting fanny mail to all her faves, Drake, Nikky Jam, you name it,” Ike said ruefully. “At least I know the thongs are legit; I ordered smoked lace for her, 3 for 40 bucks from Savage X Fenty, the Valentine’s special.”
“Tracy’s gone over the deep end, gifting fanny mail to all her faves, Drake, Nikky Jam, you name it,” Ike said ruefully. “At least I know the thongs are legit; I ordered smoked lace for her, 3 for 40 bucks from Savage X Fenty, the Valentine’s special.”
by Hifalutin! February 3, 2022
Get the Fanny Mail mug.Detta swung her foomfy pillows over the side and got up to face another day. Robert Crumb watched approvingly, setting the needle down on his morning Elmore James selection (original, not remastered) before padding back to bed. “The Sky Is Crying” was all he had now, that and Detta’s thighs.
“Rad barrels, bro,” says Caleb, shaking droplets from his hair and holding aloft his longboard at Maverick's.
“Later,” says cousin Om, "Can’t hear you.” Eyes glomming onto the wenches ranged across the sand.
“You always were a thigh bloke,” says Caleb. “When will you wake up to good old fashioned T and A?”
“Them’s my father’s trip,” says Om. “I prefer the pillows.”
“Rad barrels, bro,” says Caleb, shaking droplets from his hair and holding aloft his longboard at Maverick's.
“Later,” says cousin Om, "Can’t hear you.” Eyes glomming onto the wenches ranged across the sand.
“You always were a thigh bloke,” says Caleb. “When will you wake up to good old fashioned T and A?”
“Them’s my father’s trip,” says Om. “I prefer the pillows.”
by Hifalutin! February 10, 2022
Get the Pillows mug.