36 definitions by GIRTHQUAKE72

What a female loves to feel between her thighs. The right scruff to jawline ratio is a lady killer.

Also known as a 3 to 5 day old rockstar beard.
1. Omg, his Scruff has me dripping wet right now, I want that between my thighs for hours!

2. He is such a sexy rockstar drummer, his scruff is always so on point. He has to be Italian with that scruff and jawline.
by GIRTHQUAKE72 November 24, 2019
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The Guy that your Ex GF ends up with, that helps you fully understand your true value, and instantly validates what you already knew.... that you were always way too good for her.

You don’t dislike this guy, you love him from the second you see his completely absent, zero style....and his creepy, weathered, Opie like features. 90% of his wardrobe comes from either Bass Pro Shop or Cabelas. He dresses like he is, a Junior in high school, yet plays on a way too old man, weekend warrior, softball or OTL (on to losers) league.

His passion and fire in life....is beer, beach, beer, and bro’s. He might combine 2 of them and do something as riveting and spicy as.......Bass Fishing.

Also know as a Downgrade Bro, he has a bad flat bill surf hat, and way too worn, surf tank top, for every occasion. He sleeps in a hat, has sex in a hat, and showers in a hat. He is always making dumb goofy faces or stupid over exaggerated gestures in every pic. This helps off set the ugly, the age and sun weathering, and the severe lack of handsomeness and endowment. (Big lifted truck/small white dick)

Chaaaa brahhh is part of his everyday vocabulary, and being a beach burnout local is his true specialty and prideful talent. Most likely listens to a lot of really bad white boy reggae....(Iration, Dirty Heads, Rome)
1. Dude surfs up at the pier brahhhh, i saw your Ex’s, Downgrade Dude surfing the polluted turd break the other day brahhh! He looked older than her dad, it’s gross !!!

2. Hey are you still dating that one girl that never smiled, was super bitchy, and just read books in her room? (Person 2)......No my man, her lease was up. I Traded in and upgraded to a sleeker, sportier, sexier model, she went with a serious Downgrade Dude.

3. Can I trade in my Lamborghini for that Peugeot over there? Or my Ferrari for that Citron?.....this would best describe my Gf with me, or her choice of a Downgrade Dude.
by GIRTHQUAKE72 November 27, 2019
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A category of easy listening or smooth jazz music that as soon as it is played, the sparkle in ones eyes lights up, (because they know it’s about ( to get steamy). At this same moment, simultaneously, a Jacuzzi is turned on to heat up.

Wine 🍷 is a major part of this music genera, and so is (hot sex) in a jacuzzi! Women can’t resist because 1. They are getting to go in a hot tub and get naked. 2. Because there is wine. 3. Because they know they will be getting sexed up and taking dick in a steamy romance novel style jacuzzi fuck fest. Irresistible set up gentleman use it to your advantage.

Thornton Winery and Humphries at the Bay are venues you might catch jacuzzi jazz cat bands like these playing at.
(Fourplay, The Rippingtons, Rick Braun, Norman Brown)
It never fails, as soon as I opened some wine , and put some jacuzzi jazz on, my good girl date went from uptight prudish, to dripping wet and unlacing my swim trunks and looking at me like I was Fabio!

My Gf was demanding Lana Del Ray, be played while we were in the Jacuzzi, and I Informed her that would surely guarantee me drowning myself while she scrolled T.U.M.B.L.R. being a disconnected bitch. So I popped on some Jacuzzi Jazz and stuffed her with my hard Salami till she couldn’t even walk from the Girthquake she received.
by GIRTHQUAKE72 December 23, 2019
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Similar to the village bike just the hospital edition. This is the work slut that is known from the top floor to bottom floor, but is known best for her work on the gentleman’s floor. If you run into her in the elevator, the code words are “going down?......which floor?” She will show you what floor she’s getting off on.

Everyone needs to ride or use the hospital bike at some point, so from Doctors on down to pharmacy techs, to research study participants, to bed pan boys...they all get a turn to ride the bike.
Hey they always say Doctors know best, well Dr. Sammy told me to try out the hospital bike tonight. I told him that she has a BF and he said.....”hahaha, yeah She tells him she doesn’t know how to ride a bike. Oh she rides, trust me.”

2. Hey has anyone seen the hospital bike, I’m so horny? Check the floor 5 storage room. I saw her crushing on some silver scat daddy earlier up there. That bike Sure gets a lot of use.
by GIRTHQUAKE72 November 21, 2019
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When some who is already a depressed, dark, cold, not fun, introverted drag, with truck loads of baggage stock piled, wakes up with another reason to hate life and bring those down who can smile and enjoy the date on the calendar, or the time of season it is.
1. PSA....My Seasonal DuHpressagain is making me drink these IPA's and making me put on this winter weight. I hate calendars.

2. Hey wanna go to the snow with us and have fun with the ski bunny Sluts? No, i hate winter, and spring, and summer, and fall.......and i hate you too. Thanks but no thanks....my Seasonal DuHpressagain is about to kick in any day now. Where is my Lana Del Ray mix.
by GIRTHQUAKE72 November 13, 2019
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A hot, in shape Daddy, that smells good, and wears an obsessive amount of puma track suits. Usually Italian in heritage, and makes a living fucking hot younger girls brains out, all day every day. Sometimes the track suit jacket is used to choke one of the lucky ladies he is smashing out.
1. OMG, did you hear what that Track Suit Puma Daddy did to Ani, and her roomate? Sign me up Daddy!

2. Yes daddy yessssssssss, choke me with your puma track suit daddy.........omg omg omg omg......im cumming again......
by GIRTHQUAKE72 November 18, 2019
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A person who is an oral slut and has no problem or shame using someone to fill his or her hedonistic desire tank full to the top, with great oral sex. They will use and abuse, whoever they need to achieve their oral pleasure.
1. I licked that pussy so good that when I hit her with the 360 Clit Lick she went Cunnilingus Hedonist on me the rest of the relationship!

2. Bro, my tongue is so tender, and my jaw is sore, from this Cunnilingus Hedonist I’m dating.
by GIRTHQUAKE72 November 12, 2019
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